Thursday, October 16, 2014

Project Runway 10/16/14--"Finale Part 1" summary

Previously on Project Runway: something about “street chic” and then everyone tried to make boring mall clothes, and then they had to remake a losing outfit. Mysteriously Korina got paired with Char, but she said she didn’t want to be there and she wouldn’t be any help anyway so she was allowed to leave. In the end no one actually won anything, and Emily was eliminated. Like they would eliminate Char. (click for more)

So the final four are greeted on the runway by Heidi and Tim, who pretend they are the only ones showing at Fashion Week. They will have $9000 to create a 10 look collection. In five weeks. Remember when they had months? Five damn weeks …sigh. Also some woman from Best Western. That’s the best you can do? One step up from Motel 6? Anyway, after a commercial for this dumb hotel, they tell the designers they’re going to Rome. Do they really have time for that? I’m gonna say no. Three days in Rome, which has to inspire their Fashion Week collection. They can’t be inspired by whatever they want? It has to be inspired by “the ancient city of Rome”? I mean…not like they tend to have inspirations that make any sense anyway, but still. I’m annoyed for them.

Also they got new luggage. Woo. They don’t even get suites at the Best Western. Tim has picked out sites for them to visit. It’s all the classics, so everyone gushes about how great Rome is and how beautiful and they’re really there at whatever famous buildings. You get the idea. Everyone takes pictures and Tim gives history lessons. The designers and Tim hang out and discuss where they’re going to work. Sean has to set up his whole studio. Char hasn’t won a challenge yet, so I guess she’ll win this week. Right? That’s how it works? Sean says Char should play the lotto after the show because she’s been really lucky. Ha. See Korina, that’s how you throw shade. Day two involves more inspiring sites and they also have to sketch. Kini loves how everything is still standing. Timeless. Amanda talks about high fashion. This would be the ultimate redemption. Sean has to keep the excitement through the whole show. Char has to be herself. Then she asks Tim why he saved her, and he says he believed in her and her voice, which he says hasn’t been fully heard. *eye roll* Look, Tim can use his Save however he wants, I’m just really cynical.

Now they get to spend a bunch of money at a fabric store. They don’t have to actually buy anything, but they can if they want. Sean is super confused, because he doesn’t even have a sketch ready. Amanda buys three yards of a brown silk (I think) for a total of $294. Char finds a really cool yellow and green and black print and Tim pressures her into buying some. They all go back to the hotel and have a champagne toast before they leave.

Tim heads to Hawaii which is so nice. I love Hawaii. It is “three weeks later” so that means two weeks until Fashion Week right? Kini had a block so he does not have a million things done. He is not done yet and everyone is shocked! Well, Tim. Tim is shocked. But he has lots of details. His inspiration is some Park Avenue girl who goes to Rome on vacation I guess. Plenty of denim, of course. There’s a cool white jacket with horizontal pleats. It’s totally Kini. His family loves and supports him, of course, and they have a luau in the backyard. Then they try to teach Tim to hula which is possibly better than him riding a tandem bike.

Detroit to see Char. She’s hanging out on the riverfront which is nice. Her grandfather, stepmother, and stepbrother are there. They just sit at a table hanging out and talking. Every family visit has to have family members talking about how wonderful they are and how they totally support their dreams and they’re special. It’s cute but also repetitive. Her clothes have a ton of color. She spent fully $1000 on that fabric in Rome. She was inspired by how everything was small. Sure. There’s a column dress in a dark gray that has electric blue ruffles from the knee down. No.

Nashville to see Amanda. 10 days left. She took pictures of art deco details, which doesn’t seem to qualify as “ancient city” but whatever. Bohemian and mod. That doesn’t make sense. Nothing is finished. She wants to silk-screen some stuff, and she has fringe that won’t work right, and jewelry. She is totally Gretchen. Tim tells her not to try too hard. They go to her house, I guess, which is really old but they just sit on the porch which is not exciting. Yeah nothing really happened there.

Sean has his studio up and he Skypes his parents. Aww, cute. One week left. He’s in New York? Sure. Listen, this show is almost over and I just want to be done. The home visits are a nice break but nothing actually happens so they are not holding my attention. Sean has decided to be inspired by the trail of Caesar. Sure. He does seem to have a detailed story and an order for his garments. Also fringe. Tim has a concern: do you have two collections here? The non-fringe stuff is too ready-to-wear and doesn’t go with the fringe stuff. So maybe he will have to scrap at least one outfit that he’s already made, because it won’t fit into what he’s doing with the others.

So when you’re in the states and not at a Best Western you get a two story hotel suite. It’s bigger than my apartment. Everyone is happy to see each other, which is both really nice and also boring. Heidi and Tim left them champagne. Kini gets an interview about wanting to win which just smacks of editing. I feel like he’s going to lose. Sad.

The workroom has photos of everyone somehow. Sean decided to go with the fringe. At least it’s not boring. Every piece has fringe. Amanda shows everyone her stuff, and Sean is impressed at least. Char thinks she is outside the box, but Kini thinks Char is too disjointed. Tim shows up to give a gather ‘round. Do you have a lot of work to do? Too bad! Makeup consults and makeup fittings will be today, as well as Tim Time. Sean has to untangle fringe. Kini has more than ten looks, of course. Random makeup guy. I mean, unless the makeup and styling is super ugly we won’t hear about it. Kini is embellishing for no reason because he’s bored.

Tim Time! He says the judges would like a preview of three looks and this will be happening two hours from now. Ha ha suckers! Really you should expect something like this. Char and Amanda freak out because they have the most to do. So is there a danger of elimination? Tim didn’t say. As the models come in, Tim is also wandering around giving advice. Sean says something is on purpose and Tim says to make sure the judges know that. Char has a bright blue dress that looks REALLY close to some of Leanne’s work. It’s a tight dress with strips of fabric attached at the ends, and twisted between. So it looks like Leanne’s noodles. But there’s some problem with it so Tim says not to show it now. Hot makeup guy Scott.

Heidi immediately announces no one is getting eliminated today. So then who cares what happens? This is just an excuse for giving some people a ton of help. Tim reported back to you about everyone’s looks, or someone did, and you decided the person you wanted to win did a terrible job. So now the “judges” want a “preview” but they won’t eliminate anyone, so they can tell everyone how much they suck and give really specific advice. And then penalize everyone for not listening, just like they did with Mondo. This is such a waste of my time, and your time. Just tell Tim what to tell your favorite and we could have saved an episode. Amanda: long skirt with some color blocking, in light and dark brown, and a crop top in white with a black print. The print is just squiggly lines and the top is really wide at the shoulders. Like, it might fall off the model. I think some of the brown is the expensive stuff from Rome. Second look is a maxi dress with a deep V in the print. Last is a black gown with royal blue at the boatneck and hem, with some of her copper jewelry that looks like triangles. At first I thought it was velvet because of how the blue looked compared to the black in the light. This is boring. I mean it’s not like this wouldn’t sell but it’s boring.

Sean: long white gown in satin, with some draping. There’s a strip hanging from the front of the dress, like a long bib, and then the fabric in the back is draped back around to the front, so her hips are wider than they should be. In the back he’s hung some long orange fringe like a ponytail. Second look is black leggings and a top with a deep V, and more black fringe. Not enough to be a skirt, though. Last look is a skirt that is all fringe, with a longer layer in white and a short orange layer on top. This is with a white short sleeved button down top, only underneath her boobs the shirt flares out so it doesn’t meet over her stomach. The back has volume too so it isn’t fitted tight to her torso.

Char: hot pants and a loose blouse in the Rome print, which is a geometric black print with yellow and green. It’s very busy but it also looks like there is very small detailing that smooths out into just color when you are far away. Anyway, the top has a high crew neck and big sleeves, but is open in the back. Second, tight pencil skirt in a black and white print that is almost a pinstripe, so it just reads as gray from a distance. The top is tulle that is gathered over one shoulder, but opaque across her boobs. Third look is a black and white striped dress with a zipper that runs all the way down. It’s pretty shapeless and the sleeves are big and I’m not impressed. Think of the silhouette of a down parka. These things do not go together.

Kini: full black skirt that is stiff with volume, so it’s probably waxed denim or something, and a white top that looks like it’s been put on backwards on purpose. The sleeves are tight to the elbow and then huge bells. Second look is a pencil skirt and a crop top with like, shredded denim. You know how the hem of your jeans looks when they’re old and you’ve been dragging the hem on the ground forever so it’s all frayed? Like that. Eh. Last look is a black shirt dress, with a deep V and lapels. The top has really wide shoulders, like big shoulder pads, and then a capelet. Like a trench coat? Eh.

I’m not watching “Project Runway: Kids”. I barely want to watch All-Stars and that’s only because of Chris March and strangely Patricia. Patricia was crazy but at least she was consistently crazy and nice to everyone.

Sean talks about how his collection starts out white and innocent but then gets darker and then there is orange. For the blood. Not red, that would be too cliché. Heidi thinks it’s fresh and young. She just likes the fringe, I bet. The second look is a really dark brown. Nina likes the separates. He claims the entire collection is not fringe. Lies. Nina’s like, good, because that would suck for you. They want to see a range. Lies again, they want to see whatever they’ve decided you’re good at.

Char was going for “useful”. Really? Sigh. I guess we’re designing for sales now. She has a ton of colors, but Heidi doesn’t think they tie together. Nina hates the pencil skirt and one-shouldered top. They don’t have enough attitude. What? The hair and shoes are too boring for the looks. Well your stupid accessory wall probably doesn’t have exciting shoes in it. Let’s be serious.

Amanda talks about her art deco thing and the jewelry she designed. Zac says to pile the jewelry on. It makes the clothes look more expensive. Heidi thinks girls will want these clothes. I guess, but then again, they can HAVE these clothes by going to the mall right now. Also if her jewelry is so great, this isn’t Project Accessory. The middle look, the maxi dress, is way too boring and she should scrap it.

Kini makes serious clothes, you guys. It is old lady.

Oh NO, a reunion! With Korina! Uuuugggggghhhhhhhhhh. Korina being smug about how saying she doesn’t respect Char is “just about the clothes” and then crying about not making friends or some shit and walking off set. With Emily for some reason. So…she’s going to go from smug “I can’t imagine why you hate me” innocence to “I’m a victim” crying. GREAT.

Anyway, back to Kini. The judges tell him the styling is terrible. It needs to be more modern. He has a gown, so Nina says he doesn’t need the third look, which is a coat. The one with the shoulders. Way too much makeup. That was the makeup guy’s idea! He was all “let’s put blue and then black over and then a ton of mascara!” Also it’s not sexy, which I actually take offense at because not everything has to be sexy. The pieces are good, mostly. They give him a TON of encouragement. I feel like they want him to win. This is my guess. He’s getting a big smackdown now, and they’re telling him to change everything basically so when he listens they can be like “oh he LISTENED to us to fix it” and give him the win.

The designers go back to the lounge, where Kini is pretty much in tears. Aww. Sean tries to give him advice but Kini like, waves him off. When he starts to cry, Char goes over and sits between him and Sean so she can comfort him, which I thought was kind of rude. Everyone seems really shocked at how harsh the judges were. He has no fabric and no time. Oh I’m sure something will come up.

Next time: this show finally ends and I’m sure we’ll all argue about this. I should sue Lifetime for the two hours I wasted writing about this episode when it had no point.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

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