Saturday, September 30, 2017

Bromans 9/28/17--Season 1 Episode 3 summary

Previously on “Bromans”: a new pair was introduced to the competition. Liam looked very intimidating, but couldn't follow it up. His girlfriend Ellie didn't approve, but no one really judged her for being mad at Liam. Meanwhile, Kai failed to understand one of the two rules of the wrestling challenge, and Modina laid into him about it and was soundly denounced. There was no explanation for why everyone said Modina was wrong, but when Ellie did the same thing no one cared. We also had an “American Gladiator” style challenge which looked painful and seemed to involve not falling down as much as it involved winning fights. Tom won, although it's not clear if he actually won any kind of prize. Kai and Tian were up for elimination, and although Kai argued that he was useless and should be kept, Doctore told Natalie to speak for Tian and then everyone voted for Tian except for Glenn. I know I was treating this show as just dumb fluff, but you all know how I feel about elimination shenanigans. There are aliens at the edge of the galaxy who know how I feel about elimination shenanigans. So Kai and Modina were banished. (click for more)
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Thursday, September 28, 2017

Project Runway 9/28/17--"The Ultimate Faceoff" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: we had the “your models are your clients” challenge. The models got to choose their designers, which was not super interesting except for 1. Samantha was chosen first, and 2. Claire was last. Claire and Shawn continued to make each other's clothes, to the point where Claire promised her model long pants if she had time, and then made Shawn's clothes and not long pants. But even though Tim told the judges this, no one said a word to Claire that we saw. Instead, all of a sudden the judges hate everything Samantha's ever done, and she's one note. Let's not mention the part where they've spent two episodes telling her that what she herself is wearing is better than what her model is wearing. Or how she basically made herself an outfit this week and they hated it. Apparently it was her time to go so she went home. Kentaro won, for making what was basically faux denim thigh highs. They were cool and all, but the bullshit with Samantha overshadowed it somewhat. (click for more)
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Saturday, September 23, 2017

Bromans 9/21/17--Season 1 Episode 2 summary

Previously on “Bromans”: a bunch of Jersey Shore-types showed up to a crappy set to pretend to be gladiators. First they had to stand outside naked while their girlfriends dug for clothing. Then they had to haul rocks in a chariot. In between these activities was a lot of nonsense and general tomfoolery. The two main actors broke the 4th wall repeatedly, almost as if they knew they were in a terrible show. The two slowest lads, Richard and Glenn, were up for elimination. As the contestants voted for who would go home, they decided Glenn was easy to beat so they kept him. Richard and Sophii lost. This show might be terrible, but I find it endlessly entertaining, which probably means I should think about my life. (click for more)
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Friday, September 22, 2017

Project Runway 9/21/17--"Models Off Duty" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: there was a cross promotion with Disney to make either “good” or “evil” eveningwear. The twins were supposed to be separated, but of course that didn't last. But they actually got two days! Brandon won because he made some weird thing that was “fresh” and “new” and whatever, which is dumb but at least it's different, I guess. But no more shirtdresses. Heidi pretended multiple people might be sent home, but in the end only Aaron, for completely running out of time and not hemming anything and also for the straps falling off his garment on the runway. (click for more)
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Saturday, September 16, 2017

Bromans 9/14/17--Season 1 Episode 1 summary

I don't know how much I've talked about it, but I LOVE terrible movies. I made my friends see “Snakes on a Plane” with me in the theater and had a blast, while they told me I “owed” them. Pff. I knew that thing would be terrible, and it was, so I was not disappointed. Same thing with “2012” or “Armageddon” or “Sharknado” or “Clash of the Titans”, the original with the shitty claymation, not the new one. So it makes sense I also enjoy terrible reality shows, like “Kept” and “America's Most Smartest Model” and that model show that followed Janice Dickinson around. So Kmanpat sent me a link to an article about “Bromans”, which was a bunch of British meatheads forced to be gladiators. I immediately knew I had to get my hands on it. Later we found out that the meatheads had to bring their girlfriends along, so my interest dropped by like 50%. Still! This show looks like “Towie” crossed with “The Quest”, but since “Towie” is a British show and I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who watched “The Quest”, that analogy probably doesn't make any sense. (click for more)
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Thursday, September 14, 2017

Project Runway 9/14/17--"Descending Into Good and Evil" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: the “make clothes for one of Heidi's clothing lines” challenge was combined with the “make your own print” challenge, with the extra challenge of “your print will be made by hand”. Michael made a slip/nightie inspired by the Chrysler building, which I thought at first would be lame but ended up being beautiful. The twins made each other's outfits, basically, and irritated everyone. Deyonte just dyed his fabric sort of a mottled blue and then made a big tank top and drawstring skirt for his model, who was one of the plus-size models, so he was sent home. (click for more)
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Thursday, September 7, 2017

Project Runway 9/7/17--"We're Sleeping Wear?" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: the designers were asked to be “inspired” by “dance, movement, and innovation.” If that sounds vague and confusing, don't worry. Several designers didn't get it either. Deyonte jammed a needle through his finger, so that sucked. The twins also continued to be annoying. Batani made a dramatic cape, but was beaten by Brandon and his Fashion shirt dress with loops and tabs and whatnot. Deyonte made an ice skating outfit with a mullet hem, but in the end was safe. Kudzanai had so many ideas they all clashed, ribbons and feathers and panels and a tight skirt. So he was sent home. (click for more)
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