My monkey could do that

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

"Joe Schmo 2"--episode 3

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: the solution to Ingrid being suspicious was to have the “bitch” of the house take her aside and tell her to quit ruining it for everyone else. Not a terrible strategy, as it seems to work. Austin flirted with Cammy a lot, giving Eleanor a chance to live up to her nickname of “The Weeper”. She got very upset with Austin but he still picked Cammy for grape stomping because Austin is actually not so great. Tim continued to hate Bryce. Ernie took off his shirt, and since he's a big guy Piper was disgusted and sent him home first. (click for more)
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Sunday, August 14, 2016

"Joe Schmo 2"--episode 2

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: we met our schmos, Ingrid and Tim, who are supposedly trying to look for love on a dating show. The first eliminations were all minority people, because dating shows are full of white people. Later there were gifts, drinking, stripping, and a hot tub date. Ingrid and Tim are cool people but not the overwhelmingly awesome person Matt was last season. I don't care because they're still great. The “Pearl Necklace” eviction ceremony sent Rita the drunk home. However, during the ceremony the women were all asked to plead their case to Austin. Everyone had rehearsed speeches, of course, except Ingrid. And she noticed. (click for more)
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Sunday, August 7, 2016

"Joe Schmo 2"--episode 1

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: the first season of the show was an interesting experiment. Matt was a great schmo, because he was an all-around great guy and everyone really liked him. He stood up for people and was nice to everyone. He also really deserved his prizes. (click for more)
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Monday, July 25, 2016

"The Joe Schmo Show"--episode 8

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: Ralph surprised everyone with a sudden death elimination. Both Hutch and Ashleigh told Matt he should vote for Brian, but in the end, everyone voted for Ashleigh. Then Ralph revealed that the eliminated contestants would be returning to decide who wins the game. Matt briefly freaked everyone out by saying he had been wondering if the network exec was real or an actor. We had jury questioning, and Matt was his usual nice upstanding self, saying he had a great time and he's won already. Then each jury member read their own vote and explained themselves. So far there are two votes Hutch, two votes Matt, and one vote Brian. Dr. Pat told everyone she was voting for the realest person, and then the episode ended. (click for more)
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Sunday, July 17, 2016

"The Joe Schmo Show"--episode 7

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: Hutch returned, because of some plausible legal stuff. And because it's more entertaining for him to come back. There was a gross eating challenge, complete with supposedly asking Matt to eat dog shit. Conveniently once he protested he was told there was a network exec there for him to talk to. The “network executive” told him if he got Molly and Ashleigh to kiss they could have their rewards. Matt was ready to ask them to go topless even. After Matt and Hutch win immunity, Kip and Molly were eliminated. Molly and Ralph made out as she left. (click for more)
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Wednesday, July 13, 2016

"The Joe Schmo Show"--episode 6

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: Ralph had to wear a bee costume, and everyone else had to rub honey on each other. Matt and Molly lost, so they had to stay handcuffed to each other all day. Then Molly's boyfriend showed up, slut-shamed her for wearing a bikini, and left, which set up Molly hooking up with Ralph. Hutch continued to threaten Kip with the pool, and was kicked off the show for threatening other cast members. (click for more)
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Friday, July 8, 2016

"The Joe Schmo Show"--episode 5

Previously on “The Joe Schmo Show”: After Earl's eviction, Matt was really upset. So upset the producers talked about not continuing. But they did, telling the actors to move the storylines a little faster and just be aware, I guess, that this is a real guy. So they decide to do some sumo wrestling and Matt laid Dr. Pat out and gave her a head injury. Oops. He was upset again (partially because one of the storylines they advanced was that Dr. Pat and Hutch slept together) but she was fine. Matt won the sumo game, but he gave his trip prize to Dr. Pat because he felt bad. The elimination game made Ashleigh a bitch about Molly flirting with Ralph but allowed Matt to win immunity. Dr. Pat left the game with $25,000, a bribe to quit. Matt was shocked, because it was attached to the trip prize he gave away, but he said he wouldn't have taken it anyway. (click for more)
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