Tuesday, October 14, 2008

TAR13, Recap Leg 3, 10/12/08

Welcome to Leg 3! Last time, on And They Didn’t Even Say Hi To Us!, teams raced domestically from Salvador to Fortaleza and end up passing their exit, which took care of the Tina-induced bunching. Mark and Bill have mad computer skills, and Ken and Tina surge into first place. Anthony and Stephanie are eliminated (Toyouke: “Who?”). Yeah, exactly. Who will be eliminated. . . next? (click for more)

Arrival at the pit stop last episode:
1st – Ken/Tina, Team Mom and Dad Evans, arrived at 12:51 PM
2nd – Mark/Bill, Team Ubernerd, arrived at 12:52 PM
3rd – Terence/Sarah, Team Asshat, arrived at 1:13 PM
4th – Aja/Ty, Team Aw Hell, arrived at 1:14 PM
5th – Toni/Dallas, Team Himbo, arrived at 1:15 PM
6th – Nick/Starr, Team HSM! *jazz hands*, arrived at 1:17 PM
7th – Kelly/Christy, Team Divorcée, arrived at 1:18 PM
8th – Andrew/Dan, Team Superbad, arrived at 1:22 PM
9th – Marisa/Brooke, Team Southern Belle, arrived at 1:23 PM

Cidade Da Criança, Forteleza, Brazil

So, just to set you up for the drama of this episode, the teams are eating, chatting, mingling, and the divorcées are minding their own business and taking off their clothes. Anyway, Kelly’s sports bra apparently falls off the balcony and she blames Starr who vehemently denies the whole thing, but Kelly and Christy can’t stand her anyway. Oh dear, do I have to deal with this for an entire season? Please. NO.

12:51 AM Ken/Tina (1st)
Clue: Fly 1200 miles to La Paz, Bolivia (Kmanpat: “Hey, we went there in Geometry Amazing Race 5!”), which is 12000 feet above sea level. Then take a taxi to the Simon Bolivar statue and find your next clue in the morning edition of the newspaper in the classifieds section.

12:52 AM Mark/Bill (2nd)
1:13 AM Terence/Sarah (3rd)
– Sarah: “I just realized that we’re here to race and that I shouldn’t really care about the other things going on with the teams.” Oh honey, you think?

1:14 AM Aja/Ty (4th)
1:15 AM Toni/Dallas (5th)
1:17 AM Nick/Starr (6th)
1:18 AM Kelly/Christy (7th)
– Apparently they think they are the comic relief for the race. Yes, actually, I get great joy at laughing at you every time the Amazing Editors have to find you a clue box or show your taxi pulling away. Keep doing that.

1:22 AM Andrew/Dan (8th)
1:23 AM Marisa/Brooke (9th)
– One of them (I can barely tell them apart) says: “Everyone underestimates us, we’ve came in last every leg and we’re still here!” And that means that you’re finishing second to last, ladies. Good job.

Teams arrive at Fortaleza International Airport in the following order:

5- Toni/Dallas
6- Nick/Starr
7- Kelly/Christy
8- Andrew/Dan
9- Marisa/Brooke

Teams choose flights to La Paz. Apparently there are two flights, one taking the Amazing Orange Line and the other taking the Amazing Yellow Line. However, we don’t learn how the teams are split or how they land because apparently it doesn’t matter. I sense bunching.

So, teams arrive in La Paz in the following order:

1- Nick/Starr
2- Mark/Bill
3- Terence/Sarah
4- Toni/Dallas
5- Aja/Ty
6- Kelly/Christy
7- Ken/Tina
8- Marisa/Brooke
9- Andrew/Dan

Teams then take their taxis to the Simon Bolivar statue, where the kind people of Bolivia have blankets waiting for them! How nice. Brooke is still cold. There is much sleeping and, at sunrise, the putting on of make-up by Christy (who has to fix her beauty mark). Then the ever-so cute and adorable Nick tries to smooth things over about the bra. That doesn’t go so well, and the Divorcées still hate them for no apparent reason.

Oh, and we meet Bolivian Fern. I think her name is Maria. She’s hanging out with Terence and Sarah (Toyouke: “That is the LAST team that I want to have a Fern. I hope she’s related to Lauren and Duke’s Evil Fern.”)

So the newspaper truck arrives, and teams search the paper to find their clue in the classifieds in the following order:

1- Andrew/Dan
2- Ken/Tina
3- Nick/Starr
4- Toni/Dallas
5- Mark/Bill
6- Terence/Sarah
7- Kelly/Christy
8- Aja/Ty
9- Marisa/Brooke

Teams read their clue and find that they must now travel to the Narvaez Hat Stand in the Plaza Murillo. (Kmanpat: “This was the Midpoint Detour of our Bolivia Leg!” Toyouke: “Oh dear Lord, how do you remember this? And why do you care?” Kmanpat: “I wrote it down.”) The teams arrive in the following order:

1- Andrew/Dan
2- Terence/Sarah
3- Mark/Bill
4- Marisa/Brooke
5- Ken/Tina
6- Kelly/Christy
7- Aja/Ty
8- Nick/Starr
– who decided to take a taxi to the store. As did. . .
9- Toni/Dallas

Once folks purchase a Cholita Hat to keep with them, we get the Detour Clue.

Musical March OR Bumpy Ride

*Musical March: Teams must travel ON FOOT to Plaza Estudiante, Plaza Bolivia, and Plaza Isabela la Catolica, several blocks apart and collect musicians to form a marching band to take to the Plaza Abaroa to get their next clue.
*Bumpy Ride: Teams must travel ON FOOT to the Mercado de las Brojas and find traditionally built bicycles to ride and use the provided map to navigate to the Plaza Abaroa for their next clue. Oh, and they must wear lots and lots of plumage.

1-Mark/Bill choose Bumpy Ride – and also decide to take a taxi to the detour. (Kmanpat and Toyouke: “NOOOOOOOOOOOO!”)
2-Andrew/Dan choose Musical March
3-Marisa/Brooke choose Musical March
4-Terence/Sarah choose Bumpy Ride
– and also take the taxi, but catch their mistake early on and drive back to the plaza in order to not incur a penalty. Of course, Terence tries to blame their losing on her. Whatever, asshat.
5-Ken/Tina choose Bumpy Ride
6-Kelly/Christy choose Bumpy Ride
7-Aja/Ty choose Bumpy Ride
– Aja, on doing the task: “Aw, hell.”
8-Nick/Starr choose Bumpy Ride
9-Toni/Dallas choose Bumpy Ride
– and Toni isn’t doing too well.


This is the first of two U-Turns of the race. Teams may choose to u-turn any team they wish (well, the team has to be behind them), but they may only use the U-Turn once during the race. If a team is u-turned, they must go back to the Detour choices and complete the Detour that they did not complete.

After completing the detour, teams arrive at the U-Turn and then get their next clue in the following order:

1-Mark/Bill choose to U-Turn no one – “Bumpy, as advertised.”
2-Marisa/Brooke choose to U-Turn no one
3-Terence/Sarah choose to U-Turn no one
4-Ken/Tina choose to U-Turn no one
5-Andrew/Dan choose to U-Turn no one
6-Nick/Starr choose to U-Turn no one
– which is probably not a good move, espevially since Kelly and Christy already don’t like you, and you tried to get Aja and Ty to turn against them as well!
7-Aja/Ty choose to U-Turn no one
8-Kelly/Christy choose to U-Turn no one
– but did think they were last.
9-Toni/Dallas cannot U-Turn

Teams complete the detour in the following order:

1- Mark/Bill
2- Marisa/Brooke
3- Terence/Sarah
4- Ken/Tina
5- Andrew/Dan
6- Nick/Starr
7- Aja/Ty
8- Kelly/Christy
9- Toni/Dallas

Teams are now instructed to take a taxi 8 miles to Los Titanes Del Ring, where they will find their next clue. A lot of teams hit nasty traffic in La Paz, and a lot of taxi drivers have no clue where they are going. They arrive in the following order:

1- Ken/Tina
2- Marisa/Brooke
3- Mark/Bill
4- Toni/Dallas
5- Terence/Sarah
6- Nick/Starr
7- Aja/Ty
8- Andrew/Dan
9- Kelly/Christy

And teams come to the second roadblock.

Who’s ready to pick a fight?
In this roadblock, one team member must don a spandex costume and fight a Bolivian Cholita, who is a female wrestler. Roadblockers receive a lesson in one of two outdoor rings to learn a 6 move routine, which they perform inside once they perfect it. If they perform the routine flawlessly, they will get their next clue.

The following team members complete the Roadblock.

1- Ken
2- Marisa
– who took two tries.
3- Mark – who took three tries. And oxygen.
4- Dallas – who looks great in spandex, by the way.
5- Sarah
6- Nick
– who looks great in spandex, by the way.
7- Dan – who shockingly looks great in spandex, by the way.
8- Ty
9- Kelly

After much hilarity, teams complete the Roadblock in the following order:

1- Ken/Tina
2- Toni/Dallas
3- Andrew/Dan
4- Nick/Starr
5- Aja/Ty
6- Marisa/Brooke
7- Mark/Bill
8- Terence/Sarah
9- Kelly/Christy

Teams must now take a taxi to Mirador el Monticulo, the PIT STOP of the third leg of this racearoundtheworld. The last team to arrive MAY be eliminated!

1- Ken/Tina – who win a trip for 2 to Cabo San Lucas.
2- Toni/Dallas
3- Terence/Sarah
4- Marisa/Brooke
5- Aja/Ty
6- Nick/Starr
7- Andrew/Dan
8- Kelly/Christy
– who are the last team to arrive. However, Mark and Bill took a taxi when they should have traveled on foot, and are now. . .
9- Mark/Bill

And Mark and Bill are eliminated. Oh, nerds, how I will miss thee. Badly.

1st – Ken/Tina
2nd – Toni/Dallas
3rd – Terence/Sarah
4th – Marisa/Brooke
5th – Aja/Ty
6th – Nick/Starr
7th – Andrew/Dan
8th – Kelly/Christy

Next week: Aja and Ty finally get moody, and teams go wind surfing and arm breaking in New Zealand! Until next time. . .

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