Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Top Design 10/29/08--"Finale pt. 1" summary

Previously on Top Design: everyone had to make rooms out of Jonathan Adler products, which was semi-interesting. Then they designed rooms around giant sparkling chandeliers. Some of them were cool, but Preston’s looked weird. He won, somehow, even though his chandelier was only the center of the room when viewed at exactly the right angle. Nathan did a loud room that somehow worked. Eddie had immunity, which was good because his room sucked. Ondine’s room was next worst, but Andrea got really homesick and quit. In a very evil move, the judges wouldn’t just kick her out; they made her confirm that she wanted to leave. AFTER they told the women that Ondine’s room was the worst of the two. Whatever. (click for more)

Ondine (who is wearing bright red and yellow, and navy blue) tells us she’s glad that she’s still here and Andrea gave her her spot. Nathan appears with a cake covered in candles, because it’s Eddie’s birthday. Eddie interviews that he’s with a talented group of people. Notice he didn’t say he likes them. They have all managed to buy him presents somehow. Then he’s a bitch about Preston, saying he’s not part of the group and he’s too L.A. or whatever. Preston says he needs time alone and he’s not getting any. You look pretty alone sitting there by yourself.

Instead of dropping the designers off at the workroom, they end up at some townhouses in a new development. India gives them some blah de blah about how they’ve made it this far, and then gives them the challenge: design one room of one of these houses. No one looks surprised or disturbed. However, they must be wary of what they pick, because three of them will continue on and design the entire rest of the house. The finale this season, instead of lofts, will be 3 bedroom town homes. Eddie for some reason cries at this news. Ondine says she’s designed entire houses before, although she’s had a year to plan. $20,000 for this one room, and if they make it that far, $85,000 for the whole thing. Wow. So this room is supposed to make the judges want to see your entire house.

90 minutes for planning and ordering. Ondine wants to prove she’s worthy. Eddie misses his calm bedroom. Which is super rich, he says. Preston picks the family room, because he is thinking he wants a dining table. We get shots of Preston’s home, which is CRAZY. It’s very ornate and looks like no one actually lives there. He says he worked with his father in construction when he was younger. Uh oh. Nathan then shares that he began designing at 10 years old, practicing vacuuming lines into the carpet. Hee. His house is much more fun than Preston’s. He wants to show a new side of himself. Ondine thinks there is art in small spaces, so she‘s redoing one of the small bedrooms. Her house is huge and has a crapload of stuff in it. I kind of like it. Eddie doesn’t care what the judges want, he’s going to do whatever he wants. Where are the pictures of Eddie’s house?

Shopping time! Everyone runs for what they want. Eddie complains that Preston’s tagged too much. Wah. They’re all doing different rooms, so that should mean there isn’t much fighting. Supposedly. Everyone escapes without much bloodshed and goes to another store. Ondine seems to be at a loss, and can’t find what she wants. She’s flailing at the last minute, and tries to explain her list, but I think she wrote it in shorthand so she’s not sure the salesperson understood her. In the Top Design show room, there is a lot of name flashing. I guess they collected stuff from different stores and shoved it all in there, but they still wanted to namedrop sponsors or something. That would explain why there are papasan chairs in there.

Back at home, Eddie is making shooters and drinks for everyone. He and Nathan and Ondine party while Preston hangs out by himself. He’s got a history of alcoholism which would explain why he’s not partying. Then…um…Nathan comes downstairs in a curly wig and a headband and some of Ondine’s clothes. And heels. It’s…just…wow. He pretends to be India, although he really should pretend to be Kelly since she’s the one with the headgear. He’s also pretty drunk. (Kmanpat: “Oo, drunk and in tight pants! Yay!”) Eddie puts his hands all over Nathan. Ondine talks about how silly they are and how she likes it. Is…is that a tongue stud? Nathan has his tongue pierced? Why didn’t I notice that before? Eddie complains that they were all having fun and then Preston wasn’t, like “he got on the wrong bus”. Then for some reason Nathan and Eddie are doing a confessional together. Is Eddie sitting on Nathan’s lap? And they’re making fun of Preston, which consists of pretending to blow up their muscles. Eddie is like, Nathan! I, we have to shave you! Because he shaves! And Nathan gives him a LOOK. Why did the producers let them do this drunk? This is unsettling, like in a minute they’re going to go hold him down and try to shave his head. Bur I must admit, when Nathan bites his necklace and looks coy it’s very cute.

In the morning somehow no one is too terribly hung over. There’s a montage of Nathan’s rooms that he‘s done on the show…uh oh. Overnight the wallpaper and paint people have been here, and also the furniture delivery people. Everyone gets movers for two hours. Ondine’s desk is too big and won’t fit in the door. She asks them to dismantle the desk, but the legs are glued onto the top so it looks like that won’t be happening. She says if it won’t fit in the room she might as well stop now. Preston makes the movers move the furniture around, just like he used to do when he moved as a child. He is kind of annoying about it but hey, I would make them move it too. By some miracle (I think removing two doors or something) Ondine’s desk has made it into her room. Eddie comes over, for some reason, because he has nothing better to do. Neither does Nathan. They both like her room. Well, Nathan does. Eddie says some babble but I hear the phrase “tranny ding dong”. Sweetie, you are not Christian. You are 5 inches and at least 50 pounds over.

Todd time! He likes Preston’s accessories, which are silver antlers. He tells him he needs them. I feel like that’s important. Todd asks Ondine about her sad window treatments, and suggests she get floor to ceiling drapes. She doesn’t have time for that. But she’s going to try. Eddie’s room is blue and has a nature tree wallpaper design. He says maybe it’s not what the judges want but he doesn’t care. Todd loves Nathan’s crazy but he’s going more calm today. Todd begs him to do something crazy. This doesn’t look good.

Preston glues plates to a wall. Well, he puts glue and then nails underneath. Nathan knows that this space isn’t really “him” like the judges have seen him, but he is hoping doing something different will help him move on. Ondine’s drapes don’t turn out the way she wants so she’s scrapping them.

Stupid Jeff Lewis is back to guest judge instead of Kelly. I dislike him so. Eddie is up first. All light blues, with a wallpaper with trees on it. Everything else is white, the linens, lamps, sideboard, the random lattice on the walls. The side tables have bamboo hangings on them to hide anything you might want to store underneath. It’s a very calming room but it’s kind of boring. Margaret lifts up the bamboo to look under the end tables, and Jeff tells her she could work on “The Price Is Right.” Oh, yes, Jeff Lewis, please insult Margaret. I will enjoy watching her kick your ass. Jonathan asks why the bed is all white without any throw pillows, and Eddie says he wanted it to be hotel-esqe. Jeff makes a crack about Jonathan Adler pillows, and Eddie kisses Jonathan’s ass while Jonathan (wearing a navy blazer and bright red pants, jeez) rolls his eyes. Eddie says his whole house would be “easy breezy” and relaxing.

Nathan’s bedroom has very pale blue walls, almost white. The bed is blue with white accents, with a black wood headboard. There’s a sideboard in rich wood. There’s a jar of nails by the bed, apparently instead of flowers. But other than that…this room is not Nathan and it’s not very exciting and it makes me sad. He claims a sexual influence and India tells him they’d be worried if there wasn’t. Jonathan is confused because he can’t find it, and Jeff points out the nails and says he knows Jonathan’s been trying not to look at them. Shut up, Jeff. There are no window treatments on the windows. Oh, Nathan. He pretends he didn’t see what he wanted.

Preston’s room has a bold blue-green wall with a diamond pattern. It’s apparently grass cloth. One big white couch, a dark blue silk chair, orange long bench, black chair. He claims to not like to use two of one thing in a room, which we know is not true. The plates are to tie into the kitchen. Preston likes that it was easy and soothing on the eye, and India jumps in to tell him that he himself is “easy and soothing on the eye.” Hee. Jeff asks about where the TV would go, and Preston I think is planning the TV downstairs. Jeff is weirdly insulting about it, like that he’s rubbing in that he has a life. I don’t know. This is Preston’s whole color palette for the house.

Ondine’s room is all in black and white, with only two walls papered in white with a black floral design. There’s a big white couch, and that desk. She says the wallpaper makes the room look bigger. She also explains that she ditched the window treatment because it was crappy. Jeff likes that everything is black and white except for one burst of color in a painting. She’s already planned the whole house, she says, so she’s hoping to be able to do that.

Judging time! Nathan put some things in the bathroom, which is good, but Margaret liked the bathroom better than the bedroom. The painting he had over the sideboard was great, but the feeling of the painting didn’t follow through into the rest of the room. Jeff wanted more edgy stuff. Oh, I knew it. Jonathan knows he’s done better stuff, and Nathan wanted to do a “pretty” room, but pretty rooms aren’t memorable. Preston is clean and polished again. He has good taste, but Jeff wished the bench was not there because it was crowded. Preston thought he had accounted for everything, but “inches make a huge difference”. *snicker*. Sorry, I am 12. Margaret wishes to have seen more Preston in the room, and Jonathan agrees. Ondine’s room was happy, but as she was trying to be simple the white walls look naked and so does the sofa with no throw pillows. Jeff decides to be the famewhore that he is and says they don’t all agree with Jonathan, he loved the black and white. Margaret likes the editing. Eddie’s room is not young or personal. Eddie, for some reason, is wearing a checked jacket and vest, and a bow tie. Sigh. Jeff doesn’t like Eddie’s style, and he pretends at first that it’s just a difference of opinion, but we all know Jeff is an asshat so you have to give it a minute to kick in. Sure enough, he thinks Eddie’s demographic has walkers and bedpans. Margaret just shakes her head. Eddie’s room is strong and classically styled, but he has a big personality and they want to see that in his rooms. Jonathan tells him he doesn’t think enough sometimes, and he plays it safe.

Preston was smart this week with different textures and is always thinking. They know his house will be great. Ondine took the smallest room and pulled it together. Jonathan is rooting for the underdog. They start to talk about Eddie, and Jeff is like, look at his clothes! You can tell! His room feels kind of impersonal, but he is capable of more. Jeff insists that Eddie has bad taste, but Margaret is like, just because it’s not your taste doesn’t mean it’s bad taste. But Jeff tells them that since he’s judging Eddie, it does matter. Margaret wants sexy, but Jeff is like, look at the man, he can’t do sexy. It sounds like Margaret is defending Eddie. Who is busy in the backroom flipping off the judges and being stupid again. Everyone agrees Nathan screwed up this week, but they also would be excited by his house. They don’t want an entire house that looks like his bedroom. Nathan tells the other designers he would have loved to cut up his headboard and glue the pieces to the wall.

Ondine’s room this week was lovely, and they tell her she’s moving on. Preston too. Eddie is consistent and is a great stylist, and Nathan is not consistent (but it sounds like his highs are higher). Nathan…congratulations! I can breathe again. Jeez. Nathan is in the finale, and Eddie is going home. Eddie feels some relief, and he regrets nothing. He says the show didn’t change him at all, he’s awesome and he’s bigger than this show. This isn’t the last we’ll see of him. Too bad.

Next time: some surprise, probably ex-contestants come to help, people freak out, Eddie is paired with Preston for maximum annoyance. Someone wins!

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