Thursday, September 22, 2016

Project Runway 9/22/16--"Just Fabulous!" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: the first episode of the show was an unconventional materials challenge. After 15 seasons of this show, people are still complaining that they don't use unconventional materials. You know it's coming. There was a minimum of drama, somehow. Erin won for making an all-yellow dress that was chic, I guess. Ian was out for doing a boring sheath dress with some fringe and then arguing about it. (click for more)

Sarah claims to be in the “winners room”, because Erin is in there and she won last week. Brik claims he didn't know who his girl was. I guess so. Dexter brags that he is always getting ragged on for doing editorial things instead of lame ready-to-wear so he's not surprised people are talking about him. He claims “80%” of the designers told him Cornelius was saying shit about him. Mah-Jing does confirm this. The other apartment talks about how they're happy just to be safe, and Cornelius is like “It's not an option for me, sorry to say it. That's ridiculous.” You're not sorry.

Heidi claims that everyone is tired and could use some fresh air. Field trip! She says today will be “faaaaaaabuuulous!” Sigh. Laurence hopes she doesn't have to run because she twisted her ankle.

Everyone meets Tim on a pier with someone from JustFab because it's time for whoever is providing the accessory wall to get their challenge. JustFab wants everyone to be fabulous. Anyway a million women descend on them from everywhere. Someone says “I wonder what this is” like they're dumb. Come on. You know what this is. There are 100 women of all ages and sizes. Create a look that would make any of these women feel like the most fabulous version of themselves. But it still should be fashion. Winner gets their look sold online, but you guessed that already. Brik says he's wary, probably, he thinks, because he's not sure what wary means. $150 and one day. Then all the women they have been talking a big game about “every” woman but then they will get to use their models? WTF bullshit is that!? If you're going to have a “real woman” challenge then you should have to use non-models! Ugh.

They sketch out on the pier which is nice. Alex loves designing for real women. That's why he's sketching pleated pants and a sheer top. Erin has a tunic and belt with snaps? So you can snap it and cinch the waist? Sure. Laurence sketches, but she says when she actually gets down to it she drapes and goes from there. Linda draws a transparent coat. Mood is Mood. Erin buys baby blue neoprene, Linda sees some fuzzy keychains (and appears to abandon them because they're fake fur?), no one seems to go over budget.

Someone mentions dropped crotch pants. Sigh. They seem to have just over 12 hours. I do like that they've said a time and then shown the clock to get an exact time for the challenge. Kimber says one-size-fits-all is a lie. Linda used to be a TV journalist. There are some solid 80's pictures with 80's hair. She wants to win for her daughters. Nathalia asks Laurence to teach her some French but she isn't the greatest at pronunciation.

Cornelius announces he's throwing out a pattern so no one else can use it. No one wants your pattern from last episode. Dexter giggles, or something? Cornelius bitches at him? Whatever. Nathalia tells Cornelius that whatever drama the two of them have going on, she is not interested in being involved. Dexter is now saying Cornelius says shit about everyone, not just him. He bitches to Erin, who says that Cornelius can hear them. Dexter of course doesn't care. Cornelius seems to be claiming no one is talking about Dexter. I don't remember if he was or not. Everyone talks shit about everyone, and I don't remember week to week if it was in confessional or what. But he does appear to go into the workroom to say “Can you tell whats-his-name to get off my fucking machine?” which is maybe not how to act if you're trying to act innocent? Nathalia is worried because she doesn't design for the everyday woman, she designs crazy shit. Then we have to discuss Jenni's laugh, because she laughs like Horshack on “Welcome Back Kotter.” Kids Google it. Jenni does admit her family is embarrassed by her laugh. Montage of people trying to imitate her and looking vaguely irritated. Laurence studied fashion, and had a kid at 16 when she was in school. Her dad cut her off and she didn't speak to him again, and then he died. Wow.

Tim Time! Alex was the first done at Mood, because he had a detailed shopping list. You'll recall he's making pleated pants and a sheer top with a cami underneath. The pants are also tapered. Not every woman can wear pleated, tapered pants. Tim likes them, and I'd like to point out Tim liked Brik last week and he almost went home. Erin talks about her snaps where you can cinch the waist of her tunic. She put sequins on the tabs, and Tim poo-poos them, saying it's all sporty and sequins don't go. Then suddenly he likes her explanation. Whatever. Tasha calls him “Boss Man” which he laughs at. She maybe is too boring? Not “personal” enough? Rik has a shirtdress, and Tim loves shirtdresses. Jenni has dumb dropped crotch pants because she loves them and for some reason Tim encourages them. Ugh. Linda is making a dress and a sheer kimono coat. The dress is knit which is tricky. Cornelius has a cowl in the back and the fabric has some stripes. Tim orders separates. Why? Why not a dress? Roberi has a bright pattern so the skirt cut is plain. Mah-Jing should use denim.

Laurence is making a jumpsuit, with a “little” dropped crotch. But it should be loose. Tim tells her that a baggy jumpsuit is not flattering, especially for larger women. Sometimes. Sometimes you can use the bagginess to pretend it's supposed to be like that and it's not fat. I have done this. So now Laurence is changing it. Brik is making a jacket out of gray with a dark green leather accent and some diamond-patterned leggings. Too many things. Dexter is making a big coat and Tim tells him to just make a coat dress. Nathalia's jacket is mesh in the back because she's making a sports bra with straps. “Everyday” women don't dress like that. Sarah holds up some black to cover her lime green shorts. Now it's more modern, but less colorful. Kimber is organized but she doesn't seem to have anything done. She wants to make her top stiff like a bell, so she'll need a lining or something. She claims not to be worried about time.

Cornelius complains that Tim told him to make separates. Last week he did what Tim told him, and he was safe which apparently was unacceptable. Well then don't do that. Stop whining. Model fitting. Kimber has nothing done. Linda's dress is too big, and it's a sweater, basically, so it's stretching. Cornelius comes over to Nathalia and says “No shade!” and she's like “OMG here we go”. Cornelius then starts saying shit about Brik's pants and Nathalia is like “No, I like him”. Apparently because Brik did pants last week and got in trouble he should never do pants again? Whatever dude. Because Nathalia shut him down, Cornelius goes over to Erin to be all “No shade but like why would you do another pair of pants?” Erin claims to have not seen anything. Laurence says people are brushing him off. Seriously dude. “Pants” is a wide category. Also your claim of innocence when Dexter was mad at you? Going around to everyone to talk about some damn pants doesn't make you look good. Sarah puts a zipper in and discovers a hole in her skirt. Kimber sewed part of her garment inside-out. Oops.

Runway day. Linda and Kimber both talk about how behind they are. Kimber doesn't have pants yet. Sarah is covering the hole in her skirt with a satin tuxedo stripe. Brik's garment is just sort of OK. Alex takes this as a mortal insult. Look, maybe he can't sew or whatever. But his shit garment is not “a giant middle finger” to everyone in the room. Calm down. Kimber is in the sewing room cursing loudly. The hem on her top is curling because she's messed with it too much. Stupid non-Scott. Linda is not confident. Kimber finally feels good about her look.

Heidi's dress is terrible. It's a satin gown with a high slit,and the color is too close to her skin. Guest judge today is Nina Dobrev. Did they say last week if there was still the Tim Gunn Save? I don't remember. Laurence: olive green jumpsuit with short sleeves. There is a big black zipper down the front, and the slight dropped crotch, so I think the fit is too much like a worker's overalls. At the top though, is a placket with some big buttons. The top looks good. It's just below the waist. The back has a narrow keyhole lined with orange fabric. Rik: skirt and top. The top is a sleeveless button-down shirt but cropped. The skirt is a short tulip skirt with a grid print. But then she turns around and it's all one piece? Or at least all attached. It's not interesting. Alex: black ankle pants, so you can't really see the pleats, and the sheer top is cropped. The camisole is also cropped. It looks like the hem is just pinned, or something. The blouse has long sleeves and a neck bow. How are these clothes good for all ages and sizes? Jenni: crop top and pants in beige, with a short jacket in a dusty rose at the shoulder and more beige. The pants are completely ridiculous. The crotch is almost down to the floor. The jacket is fuzzy at the shoulders and has texture. The pants though. Kimber: black pants in a wider leg, and a black and white print top that bells out so it has volume. There are no sleeves and the back has a keyhole. It's not bad, actually.

Linda: her model very quickly takes off the clear coat to reveal a close-fitting sweater dress with a horizontal keyhole and a high neck. I have no idea what is up with the coat, aside from it's a sort of dingy beige and not plastic. Nathalia: bright blue leggings, and a giant black coat with white cuffs and a bunch of zippers. The coat is pretty shapeless. Under the jacket is just a basic sleeveless top with a sweetheart neckline. Her model looks like a child playing dress up. Sarah: black pencil skirt and a shell in a pink floral print. Boring. I could go buy that at the mall right now. Mah-Jing: dark denim dress with maybe a tight black dress underneath? Or some shorts? The denim has a sash or a belt, and some vertical seaming, and it looks like it ties shut like a robe. And pockets. Cornelius: miniskirt in a light green houndstooth pattern, and a long sleeved top in vertical black and white stripes. The top comes down to a point over her crotch, and it has some weird seams. The back has a cowl drape on it. It's OK I guess.

Tasha: it looks like a black T-shirt and a low-slung black skirt, with a sheer overlay. So there's space between the top and the skirt, but covered in the sheer fabric. Plus the sheer drapes just below the skirt in back. Brik: gray wrap top, that has an inverted V at the bottom so you can see her navel, and then diamond-print pants. The pants are bad. They're too high and they don't look like they fit, and they're leggings, I guess, so it just looks really weird. Dexter: giant coat. That's it. It's a black coat with a lot of volume on top and a zipper, but it's a coat dress I guess so she doesn't unzip it. I can't see any details so it's just a shapeless black coat. Roberi: black kimono-style jacket, and a white top that's loosely draped, and a skirt in a bright pink and black abstract print. The skirt looks really weird, like he draped it wrong so it's very baggy around her hips but it looks like it shouldn't be. The top is almost like Kimber's bell-shaped top but softer. The jacket appears to be cut-out leaves in a pattern. Erin: tent dress in baby blue neoprene with orange shoulders. It's very full, and there are tabs on either side of the waist so you can snap it close. It looks like a cool piece, though.

Erin, Kimber, Alex, Laurence, Linda and Brik are the top and bottom. That means Jenni and her fucking clown pants are safe. In the Scrap Bin Cornelius shit talks about how Brik sucks. Alex's design has a really huge bow. He talks about “every” woman but do most women want to show their stomach? Or wear mesh open-toed booties? Heidi does admit that about the crop top, but she loves the rest of it. Nina thinks the pants work on many women, but pleated tapered pants do NOT work on many women, Nina, so get with it. Yeah, they love it. Kimber talks about the men's section? High waisted pants? Mullet hem on the top? Zac likes the pants but the top doesn't work on someone with boobs. Sure, I can get behind that. Nina is bored, which is deadly. Nina Dobrev does point out that the pants are high waisted, so they negate the crop top. Laurence claims her jumpsuit hides many figure flaws. Heidi loves it. See I think that these people just don't know anyone who isn't a model? They don't seem to understand “average” women. But whatever, I'm not looking for realism from this show.

Linda says something about urban women. The coat is like, a dingy white “kimono” that his pretty shapeless. Nina has problems with the color palette, the fabric, a lot of things. They think knit is hard to deal with, because the butt on the dress is already drooping. Linda insists she was going for it, at least. Zac says the jacket sucks too. Brik talks about one of his friends who is funky and has trouble finding blazers. So he made a cool blazer and “pull-on” pants. They're knit pants. The judges are speechless. The blazer doesn't go with knit elastic pants. Nina keeps saying there's no personality. Erin shows the judges how the flaps on the side hook together to make a belt and cinch the waist. Zac admits that not everyone can wear neoprene, but he still loves it. Plus the flaps don't attach in the back but they think this is the greatest thing. It's maybe a little too cartoonish, says Heidi. She likes it but she wouldn't buy it. Nina and Zac yell at her.

Everyone complains in the Scrap Bin. Or brags, however. Alex is really judgy about Brik, in case you thought it was just Cornelius. Everyone loves Erin's look. It does have color, anyway. Laurence's jumpsuit is well made, and in the back there are suede pockets. Nina wishes Alex had put a little sparkle somewhere, but other than that it's great. Zac's seen it before though. They hate Kimber's hem, that she jacked up when she sewed it inside-out. Linda's kimono is shredded, maybe on purpose? Maybe because the fabric sucks? They hate the knit too. Brik at least is sort of good at construction. That's about all they can say about it.

The winner seems to be between Laurence and Erin. So...a jumpsuit and a neoprene dress. Brik and Linda are the two worst. They don't know what to do about the kimono thing, but Brik's well-made outfit is super boring.

The winner is Laurence! A jumpsuit is not flattering for everyone, but whatever. She wins immunity as well as having her jumpsuit sold. Erin is in. Alex is in. Kimber is in. Brik is in. So that means Linda is out. She's disappointed in herself. But she wouldn't change this experience.

Next episode: blacklights, some kind of drama, the usual.

1 comment:

DianeP said...

Thanks for the great recap Toyouke! Laughed to myself at the phrase, "Well then don't do that. Stop whining." I need to make that my motto.

Wonder where Scott went? Maybe he'd had enough of this and moved on to something better? Sure hope so for his sake.

The favorites are beginning to shake out - a few more weeks and maybe we'll start seeing some "real fashion" from these contestants?!? There are enough mean people in the world - don't need them on tv.