Tuesday, September 23, 2014

The Quest episode 9: "Escape from Rana Village"



Previously on “The Quest”: Verlox took over Sanctum, and everyone had to flee into the woods. They found a dragon, and then a burned-out village. Everyone had to trap the dragon in its lair, because dragons sleep during the day, down in hatches with grates and locks. Andrew and Shondo were the first to finish (Andrew first), and then they helped everyone else because they have to trap the dragon. The Fates’ challenge was to lift dragon eggs out of a pit, without touching them. Patrick was first, but Lina was right behind him. Patrick tried to tell Andrew and Shondo that Bonnie was further along than Lina, but it didn’t look like they believed him. Bonnie was banished, and got a whole montage of scenes and everyone talking about how much they’ll miss her. Even the Queen said so! I will also miss Bonnie but I’m also kind of surprised by how far she got, for someone who hated running. And that no one decided to vote for her to have someone “easy” to beat in the finale. (click for more)


There’s a montage of the final four, which is cute. They talk about each person’s strengths. Plus a reminder that Shondo is the only one left who hasn’t been in the bottom yet.

In the morning no one has attacked the camp, even though there was clearly something there last night (from the night vision footage) and the Queen’s amulet glows because it’s evil, as we all knew it would be. Everyone is sitting around the fire, until a whole bunch of creepy people jump out. They look like frogs? Sure? Ansgar called them “The Rana” and that’s what “rana” means right? Anyway, they all run, and then there are Rana ahead of them on the road, so they stand in a circle facing outward. The first thing I noticed when this happened was that the Queen was not in the middle of the circle. Come on, you guys. I wonder what will happen if one of the paladins just goes crazy and starts attacking people. This makeup is pretty impressive actually. Good job on making alien-looking characters. The Queen asks to see the chief, because she says they’re trespassing. But she’s sure the chief is reasonable. Sure. Shondo says he was ready to get down, but that wasn’t what was called for, so the getting down will have to wait. Hee.

The village is decorated with fake Spanish moss and skulls and stuff. Everyone has their hands tied. Also the chief has a “mysterious cloaked figure” next to him. Gee, I wonder who that might be. Andrew asks if they should kneel, and Patrick is like “I kneel for the Queen. No one else.” Eeee! I’m still excited when the paladins get into character. The Queen asks the chief to have mercy on them. Andrew is all, this is so disrespectful. The chief asks why he should help her over Verlox. Fun fact: the same actor plays both this chief and Verlox. The Queen says that behind her is the One True Hero who will defeat Verlox. The chief doesn’t buy it, and interrupts the Queen to tell her to make the paladins tell him. Lina pushes her way to the front, and tells the chief that that’s why they’re here, to save Saenctum. He says to wait…and then picks up an hourglass. This was a thing! They had a time limit to make their argument and Lina was so eager to argue on their behalf that she jumped the script. I love it. She says they aren’t going anywhere. The chief laughs and says Verlox is a great warrior, and Lina pauses before blurting out “And so am I!” I was sort of indifferent on Lina, but she just jumped way up with that. Patrick goes next, and tells them about how he left his family. Shondo, who looks like he’s about to leap across the floor and throttle this guy, says he knows he has all the traits and he will not be defeated in battle. Man Shondo is menacing. Andrew admits he’s terrified of the Rana (uh…sure) but he wants to defeat Verlox and they are the only hope. I kind of feel bad for the boys because Lina’s speech sounded so much better, because she didn’t think about it beforehand. So she sounded really eager.

Everyone stands there while the “mysterious cloaked figure” says a bunch of stuff to the chief and then it’s all “Let Verlox decide their fate” and takes off the hood and it’s the vizier. Oh, shocking. The paladins are like I TOLD YOU, as the guards hold Ansgar back. Why is the vizier here and not with Verlox? Shondo still looks like he’s going to start busting heads at any moment. As they are taken to the cages, Shondo is like “We’ll see you later” and Patrick is all “Bet on that”. Eee I love it! I shouldn’t celebrate violence but I grinned.

Everyone gets shoved in cages, the paladins each in their own hanging cage and the Queen, Crio, and Ansgar all in one cage. Shondo is pointing at people he’s going to beat up. Crio says it’s his fault, and Patrick says it’s not, and he should keep trusting the Fates. Andrew and Lina tell the Rana the vizier is just going to turn on them too, but it doesn’t work. I mean these cages are tied with string and no one is trying to untie them which is dumb. I know it’s a story but still. Ansgar is upset at failing too. The Queen says she has already been betrayed once today. Will Ansgar betray her too? Aww. Lina wonders if maybe there won’t be a hero here, but she doesn’t want to think that way. Shondo says it’s never over until it’s over. The Queen knows one of them will defeat Verlox. Then she declares this must be a challenge from the Fates. Everyone reassures her they haven’t given up, which is when everyone discovers they have long ropes and there are knives hanging from the ceiling. No one questions why anyone would be so stupid as to keep captive warriors this way, but whatever.

So the goal is to throw a lasso around a stake, and then pull your cage along the slider until you can reach the knife. Then you can cut the cage open. Luckily the stakes have notches so once you get the loop around it, it should stay on the stake. Rope throwing ensues. Shondo says Texas will be mad at him for failing at lassoing. Heh. Andrew finally manages to get it, and pulls so hard he bashes his head open. He cuts his cage open, then grabs each knife so everyone can cut themselves free. Shondo has a weird interview about how sometimes a hero has to be saved and a true hero can thank people for helping save him? I love how Shondo spins everything.

Everyone runs to the woods, and the Queen takes off her amulet. Andrew is the one to tell her to get rid of it, and she does, which is nice. They all hide in the trees, because the Rana have figured out they’re gone. Now they’re headed for that crappy shelter they built a couple of episodes ago. Remember how I wondered what the point of that was? Apparently it wasn’t just busywork. The soldiers come back and they hide in that lean-to thing. No one knows what to do now. Ansgar wants to go back to the castle via a bog. The bog of course has a banshee. Crio thinks the Fates will know how to get past the banshee. Everyone thanks Andrew for rescuing them, and Ansgar gives him another badge. OK that’s weird. I know you get a badge when you win a challenge but they’re supposed to be on the run.

At night they’re still in this shelter. Shondo jokes about the wonderful “contemporary furniture” decorating the shelter. Hee. Ansgar collects them and says the road’s clear so they can go to the Fates. Shondo stays ready so he doesn’t have to get ready. The paladins will have to face the banshee. Shondo doesn’t want to leave it up to a vote. Lina reminds us she has three older brothers so she’s fully capable of whatever the boys are.

The paladins each get a board with three hollows in it, and then three egg-shaped things. They have to carry this offering across the “bridge”, which is a bunch of rafts and boats connected by planks. First one across will give their offering to the banshee and will be safe from banishment. If they drop the offering or fall in, they have to come back to the start. There’s a shot of the banshee, which is a woman with ugly makeup and fangs. The shrieking isn’t that scary but it is loud. I think Patrick is so big he pushes the planks to the bottom of the bog. Both the boys fall in, and Lina makes sure to go much more slowly. Shondo fails again, while Patrick is down to his hands and knees. But he’s on a log or something, so he just rolls off. Lina is also crawling, and may have an advantage because she’s lighter. She’s almost there, but she rolls off too. Ugh. Shondo makes it to about where Lina was, and by moving very slowly he makes it over. Lina has left her tray somewhere anyway, and Patrick falls in again. Shondo finds the banshee, who appears to be blind and is feeling him up. He keeps repeating “Here are my offerings” and he takes her hands to put them on the offering. Then he interviews that he keeps thinking he’s seen the ugliest thing in the world and he keeps getting shocked. Ha! Shondo comes back and he’s not even that wet.

This is hard. I like Patrick, but Lina’s performance with being so eager to argue her case? That’s a big thing too. Shondo doesn’t know how far Patrick got so he doesn’t know who got further. But Lina was putting more pressure on Shondo. Andrew says if he votes for Patrick, it’ll be cutthroat, but that’s what they need. Patrick interviews that Andrew told him he wanted the final three to be him, Andrew, and Shondo. Then Lina interviews that Andrew told her that he would vote for her. Come on, Andrew. Lina, to her credit, isn’t going to depend on that.

Shondo votes for Patrick, maybe because he wants the challenge. Andrew votes for Lina. Does he think he can beat her? Is it a thing like that? Anyway, it’s a tie. Andrew, since he won a badge today, gets to be the tiebreaker. I really like that method of tiebreaking. Andrew has to look Patrick in the eye. Lina thinks he’s maybe changing his mind, while Patrick thinks Andrew is afraid of the competition. Andrew goes back to stand behind Lina. Well I hope if that’s because you think you can beat her that you are proven wrong. I’m sad but I’m OK with Lina making it too. Plus Patrick interviews that he wanted to avoid scheming and drama, forgetting that just last episode he tried to lie about how far Bonnie got so Shondo would vote for her.

Lina is convinced Andrew is not threatened by her, but she’s not fazed. Shondo says they’re sharpening each other, and they need to push each other.

Next time: the One True Hero is chosen and I hope there is an epic boss battle.

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