Project Runway 10/8/15--"Crew's All In" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: it's time to design for the accessory wall sponsor and make clothes that can be sold to regular people. There are some “themes” which actually don't matter that much. It's not like the winner and loser were chosen because of adherence to the theme. Anyway Ashley made a really cute jacket/crop top/skirt combo but I think the jacket is too expensive to make so the judges yell at her for not defending it enough or some shit and pick Edmond as the winner. He made a perfectly fine dress, and it's a ready-to-wear challenge, essentially, so it's not like anything high fashion is going to win. Swapnil made a hot mess, as did Merline. Except Merline had good “ideas” or some shit to counteract her crap construction. And then they send Laurie home for her hot mess, which I'm fine with because it was a hot mess. (click for more)

We open with some shots of crew and people shouting countdowns or whatever. Heidi asks if they enjoyed meeting ALL OF US *significant look at the crew*. Sigh. Anyway, they go up to meet Tim, who has a walkie-talkie. This blows Merline's mind. Also there is a hair rep (not the guy that does everything every week). They will be making over a member of the crew. Candice continues to give Gretchen interviews. They're just kind of smug, and superior, but only mildly annoying. OK so this is how it will go. The jerkiest designer will get The Fat One, although maybe not this time? Because first of all, the past few seasons no one has been jerks at all, probably because they are too genre savvy. Second of all, I can't figure out who the jerk is. Right? Can you imagine anyone who is left getting all pissy about designing for someone who isn't a model? So that part maybe I can't predict. But I CAN predict there will be at least one plus-sized person, because there always is. I feel confident in saying the winner will be the person whose model has the most drastic transformation. She will have long hair she chops off and she'll not wear her glasses and have makeup when she never wears makeup and her dress (bonus points if it's the first dress she's worn in basically ever) shows off her figure. The loser will be the designer who makes exactly what their client asks for, and it ends up being not great and they blame the designer for listening to their client's terrible ideas.

Crew members are assigned. Katie,the girl who gets Merline, is terrified. Desiree gets Edmond, and she is less terrified. Ashleigh is afraid her bosses have always wanted to make her over or at least say something about her overalls. She is paired with Kelly. Jennifer knows she needs a makeover, and she gets Swapnil. Nicole gets Ashley, clearly because she is The Fat One (NOTE she's not actually that big but she is plus-sized) and there was no way she wouldn't be paired with Ashley. Tim uses his walkie-talkie for no reason. They could have had all these women here in the room. Monique loves being paired with Candice and she is excited. She is normally the model wrangler. They can each decide what look they want to make (so sportswear vs. evening vs. work) but Tim reminds the designers they are responsible for whatever it is. Do not throw these women under the bus. They will also each get a hair consult, and they get two days (twist alert in effect). 30 minutes to consult.

Katie does not want a jacket. She also wants pants? But a dress is OK if it's not tight? Nicole appears to want the same look Ashley has been making over and over again, so Ashley's a little afraid that the judges would hate it again. Desiree is very practical and wants a raincoat. Edmond has never made a raincoat. Monique is OK with bold statements which is right up Candice's alley. Ashleigh...does not want to give up her overalls. She is wearing a tank top and overalls and Kelly is going to make a fancy tank top and leather overalls. Sigh. Swapnil wants Jennifer to see how she's a bombshell, which kind of rubs me the wrong way. She wants day-to-night. I know the designers were just told to steamroll their clients. I think it just smells kind of sexist? Especially the part where he's like “if she'd just let me show her how sexy she is!” She says she doesn't really like showing off her body (I think that's what she doesn't like showing off). Jennifer doesn't think he gets what she's comfortable with. I would agree. Normally I'd say she's my top candidate for the win, since she's got long hair to chop off and she's wearing a flannel and Swapnil wants evening. But she's not really happy. Shopping is shopping. Ashley wishes Nicole was there, while Swapnil basically says he knows what he's doing and Jennifer doesn't so he doesn't need her.

Merline makes a jacket, and even Kelly knows that Katie did not want a jacket. Or to look boxy. Merline doesn't help her case by holding up the garment in the sewing room and saying “Do you think I can convince her?” There's letting the client force you to design terrible clothes (which I think is a stupid argument, they're paying you, do what they want), and there's not listening to them at all. Ashley has a freak-out about how she's lost and everything has been sucked out of her. Tim appears to call everyone to their hair consults. Everyone needs color! Everyone needs lots of hair cut off! OK not everyone. Clip in blue extensions! Sigh. Swapnil believes he will have two full days to sew, so he's fucking around. Candice gives a Gretchen interview about how he has so much talent and he doesn't push himself.

Day two. I feel like Tim Time should have been yesterday so they have time to fix things. Ashley is trying to change her attitude. Tim Time is now, and he's bringing the clients for a fitting. Ashleigh has some dark brown leather overalls waiting. They look nice, but Tim doesn't think she has done enough. Even though Kelly is planning to put in some detailing, Tim thinks she should do another piece. She might not have enough material. When Ashleigh tries it on the high waist looks terrible. Diaper butt. Candice has the corset, and Tim is underwhelmed because somehow he thinks Candice is exuberant. What? Whatever. Remember when Tim was nice to everyone and he made sense? “Where are you in this?” It's a corset. No one else is making corsets, Tim. Sigh. Merline produces a boxy jacket with big shoulders and a sheer shirt. Katie hates it. Tim then says “This is not supposed to be a compromise, this is supposed to be a marriage.” WHAT. You don't make any fucking sense, Tim. Plus the jacket is too big anyway. Terrible.

Nicole wanted sleeves, which Ashley did not make. When they go to try on the dress, I guess Swapnil is milling about. Tim asks him what his deal is and then tells him he has a lot of shit to do. Seriously dude. Get going. She's not sure, and she doesn't like the off-the-shoulder neckline. Ashley gets upset because she was so stuck yesterday. Tim insists he can't understand why this is hard. Desiree likes her coat, but maybe it's not runway. Also the pants look like they have camel toe while they're still on the dress form. Hee. Edmond is stuck about how to keep the look and the raincoat she wants, but to be runway, so does that mean ignore what the client wants? Tim gets his panties in a bunch and yells at him about why can't he do both? Why is that so hard? Oh, I don't know, Tim, maybe because you told them this look was all their responsibility and you can't blame anything on the client and EVERY SEASON you eliminate people for listening to the client? You can't tell your designers they are fully responsible for their looks and they cannot blame any of it on their client's wishes, and then get upset when they are all ignoring their clients. Swapnil has produced a leather wrap shirt with a mostly open back. Jennifer does not like it, and Tim says it's way too basic. Plus it's not even sewn up enough to try on. Tim is PISSED that Swapnil has had a full day, plus three hours, plus he's the last critique, and he is the only person to have nothing to put on his model. Swapnil tries to argue that this is why he wanted to wait (I guess wait to make anything until his client shows up?) and Tim actually interrupts him to say “What a bunch of bullshit! What is the fucking point?” Damn Tim. Tim asks him why he's even here. Eventually Swapnil says something about trying to find out who he is as a designer which is kind of dumb. Everyone always says that. So Swapnil sort of explains about whatever else fabric he has and all of a sudden Tim is like “Let's go” and they just walk away. For the vast majority of this Tim Time I think Tim is too mean and not getting it, but he does have a good point about Swapnil's work ethic and bullshit.

Swapnil complains that he and Jennifer are a poor match and he complains to the room that he doesn't have any direction. Candice/Gretchen 2.0 says that he shouldn't let this define him, but it has. It has, Candice. He got called out on fucking around and acting like he doesn't care enough to be here. That's him. Tim returns to tell everyone this “needed” to be rough and that's because he believes in their talent. Oh please. I believe he is protective of the crew, especially if the crew has been around this whole time. But not this “I HAVE to be harsh on you because I CARE.” He offers them another fitting (may or may not have already been planned and they just didn't tell anyone). Swapnil starts over, properly cowed. Maybe he is the one destined to win because he got his shit together. Edmond does some weaving technique. Ashley scraps all her look and goes from an off-the-shoulder fit and flare to a sweetheart neckline and a pencil skirt. Merline puts a collar on the coat. Will that help it be less boxy? Whatever. Candice changes her corset to a halter and does a bunch of other nonsense. Model fitting. Kelly drapes a vest out of the same leather. Ashley now has a fitted top with a peplum and she says it fits way better. Katie wants sexier and not boxy. Jennifer is still not totally happy. She says she would never wear this. I'm not sure how it's that different from what he showed before. Jennifer accuses him of having an idea in his head before he even talked to her, and then just going with that and not listening to her. Swapnil is reduced to scrounging fabric and sort of moping about how his client has different taste and won't let him do what he wants.

Runway day. Swapnil is still complaining about how he would rather not have sleeves but she wants them. Candice points out that at this point he should just do what she wants. Candice has a lot of shit going on in her garment. Katie loves what Merline did and also she got that haircut where you shave the side of your head but leave the top long. It has a name but I don't remember it right now. Swapnil's client STILL hates what he made. He put elbow-length sleeves and she doesn't like the length or how they fit or something. She interviews that the only thing she asked for is sleeves and he fucked that up. But he did put a giant flap hanging off her shoulders like a cape for some reason. She's crying and trying to hide it, but at least Swapnil feels terrible.

Commercial interlude: Swapnil shaved off his beard to start fresh and I guess it gives him a new start perspective. Edmond encourages him to ask Tim what exactly he thinks Swapnil is not giving him. I'm not sure that would be useful just because Tim hasn't been making sense recently.

Guest judges are actresses Shiri Appleby and Constance Zimmer. Kelly: dark brown leather overalls, cropped a little bit, with a shiny silver tank top and a matching leather vest. The pants actually look good, and there is no diaper butt. But there is a weird pulling at her stomach like she's pregnant, though I'd rather have that than weird crotch. Edmond: gray raincoat over a fitted dress. The skirt is black and the top is a silvery print. It's not super exciting although the coat does look pretty good, as coats on this show go. Swapnil: black skirt with ruffles down one side, knee-length I think. The top is a light blue wrap top with elbow-length close sleeves and a cape. Candice: halter top in mostly blue with lots of black leather accents and piping. Over this is a sheer top or cover-up or something with a shredded hemline. The skirt is a plain black pencil skirt. The sheer piece looks like a costume, where it's supposed to be shredded and in pieces. Sexy witch. Ashley: purple top with cap sleeves and a sweetheart neckline, and pencil skirt in a purple and pink print. There is also a double peplum, the print with a longer layer of the purple underneath. It actually fits really well. Merline: black leather skirt, slit up one side but not super high, a black sleeveless top and a sleeveless vest in gray with black piping. It looks badass. And she's working it.

Kelly explains how Ashleigh loves her overalls, and she wanted to keep that. Nina praises Kelly for not over-embellishing and putting too much shit on her outfit this time. Heidi loves it. I think the overalls might actually be eggplant. I need a new TV I guess. Everyone loves all of it. Candice wanted to be sexy. It looks a little cheap and then Zac says the sweetheart neckline says “red light district” like he knows anything about that. No one is going to try to pay her money, Zac. Dial it back some. Nina thinks the clothes are wearing Monique. Edmond explains how Desiree wanted a raincoat and she says she feel sexy. Heidi once again says she loves the hair and makeup (did the producers tell you not to shittalk the sponsors?) but the clothes are not good. The dress and the coat don't go together at all. Nina doesn't think it's effortless. Merline wanted something rock star. They all love her hair, which I will agree is awesome. Nina uses the words “huge transformation” so there you go. There is one mention of how the skirt looks like the cheap pleather it is. OK time for Swapnil. He immediately says he made this last minute, and she wanted playful and flirty while he wanted to make her hot. See I knew that was problematic somehow. Heidi asks how he could think “make her hot” and then make this outfit. Jennifer hates the outfit, which we knew. Nina says he's just done everything for himself. Then everyone is up his ass about how he's just so TALENTED and they wouldn't be so mean if he wasn't WORTH IT or whatever the fuck. I don't disagree but it's all just so condescending and eye-rolly. Ashley gave Nicole the pockets she wanted and she's come around to the colors. Zac doesn't like the proportions or the fit on the top. Looking at the top, I think it's fitted as well as it can be. But the skirt is very high-waisted so I see what he's saying about proportion. Zac and everyone frown about how she of all people should know how to make an outfit for a plus-sized model. The peplum doesn't actually hide anything but it draws focus to her hips. That's what it's supposed to do. Who said anything about hiding anything with a peplum? Nina says if it was all print or all solid, it wouldn't cut across her body so much. Also they give her shit about crying, RIGHT AFTER they were all disappointed-parent “you should know better!” Don't tell someone they fucked up when there should be no possible way to fuck up and then get mad when they are upset.

Back in the Scrap Bin Ashley says that outfit is not her. The judges love Kelly's overalls. Sure. It wasn't terrible I guess. They all think Ashley choked and they hate the color. The top of Edmond's dress is all woven, it's not a print. That's cool, although it took this long to figure that out. The coat is well made but it does not go with the dress. Merline's outfit looks expensive. There's a cutout in the back of the tank top. When Swapnil's outfit is up, Tim throws him under the bus and actually tells Zac to lift up the back and look at how Swapnil just tied the sides together or something. They all are pissed and meanwhile Swapnil is napping. Candice's top up close does look cheap. The blue looks like cheap synthetic fabric and Heidi doesn't think her boobs are perky enough. At least it has a vision and some work. Heidi wants to get rid of two people to send a message.

Kelly is the winner. You guys, eggplant pleather cropped overalls just won first place on this show. Edmond and Merline are also in. Aww, I was wrong about how the most extreme makeover should win. Swapnil is out. He knows he didn't make his client happy. Ashley and Candice are both in. Oh we expect more from you and we believe in you! Why is there so much emphasis this season on how talented everyone is and how much you believe in them and how they're forcing you to be dicks? I don't believe you. There is no Save. Tim tells the final five he's proud of them but they also need to take risks.

Next week: this stupid thing ran long but the DVR says next week is 3D printing and “avant garde”.