Previously
on “Project Runway All Stars”: the usual “avant-garde”
challenge asked the designers to be inspired by artwork. As usual no
one was really avant-garde but I'm no longer surprised by it. Sam
decided to make his dress about gay marriage, and it was horrible.
But unlike how it usually goes, when someone doesn't follow
directions and tries to make a dress out of their lives for pity
points, Sam was not eliminated. Because of course. Ken sort of called
him out, but not that well because he was trying to take the tack of
“I just don't think you're working to your potential”. Ken
himself won by making a dramatic dress with a huge collar that acted
like blinders. Emily was sent home for making something boring. Also
for not having as much drama as Sam, I'm pretty sure. (click for
more)
Also
this is an extended episode for some reason. GREAT. Alyssa comes out
on the runway in a dress with LED lights on the bodice. So it can
scroll words. You will not have to make a dress that lights up
though. We're one challenge away from the title, and we're pretending
there is no chance the judges won't let all four of them go through
to the finale. But we all know that's a pretty good chance. Anyway,
here is Nina! Nina, you will notice, is in a fierce black jumpsuit
and not a gimmicky dress. Sam has never dealt with Nina so this
should be good. Nina talks about tech and Otterbox. Otterbox are the
people who make those giant rubber phone cases. Apparently they work
with designers so the cases look nice. They will design their own
prints, and then do “print on print”. Ken says it's a setup. Dom
is super excited. Also you can buy a print at Mood, so that's print
on print that you're designing, and then another print you buy. You
must design with Otterbox in mind because the winner will get their
print produced as a phone case to be sold. Interesting.
Ken
doesn't like to work with prints, so he's glad to almost be to the
finale but not excited about this challenge. He says the only
“prints” he likes to work with is “the one who's going to party
like it's 1999.” Aww, now I'm sad. Ken thinks Dom will win, but
Kini is also feeling confident. He's making leaves and “deconstructed
art” which looks like a kaleidoscope. Dom gives Ken some advice but
eventually says she's going to stop helping him. Dom of course has a
loud geometric print. I think Ken is going for textures so his print
is more like static. Sam draws flowers and then pixelates them
because that's “edgy”. They all go to Mood to sketch for some
reason. Why don't they sketch in the workroom? The designs look fine,
I mean...they're designs. I think Sam bought more of that mesh.
Everyone has samples of their print design so they can find things.
Dom is going to paint a leather jacket.
Sam
brings up his dumb fight with Ken last episode and acts like his
choice to not engage is super noble and great. I mean it was fairly
mature but then he's like “the best thing is to do my work” when
he's spent 90% of his time shittalking everyone else. Ken comes in to
where Sam is taking a break and is all “Hi, let's talk about last
night”. SIGH. He doesn't want any unnecessary tension. OK well you
could have not said anything. Or you could have said the first part
and not the “It's bullshit that you're not eliminated but I'm not
talking to you so shut up”. Ken's “apology” is that he speaks
his mind or whatever, which is only something asshats say to excuse
their breaking the social contract by being jerks. “I'm just being
honest!” means “I will say whatever I feel like without thinking
about how it affects others and I don't care if you're upset!” Ken
claims he didn't mean to hurt Sam's feelings (HA) and then Sam is
all, well it hurt but now I'm pushing myself and I'm glad you got
this off your chest because I think we should be friends. Jesus
Christ this is worse that the stupid fight. Then they hug. How does
Sam feel better after knowing Ken thinks he's a liar and a fake? Then
Sam rolls into the workroom and thinks everyone loves him now. He
jokes about Kini, who is not amused. Yeah now you're all fake friends
with Ken but not with anyone else.
Ken
tells Dom he is not excited to see Nina because it's like your auntie
is coming to visit and you have to clean up the house and stuff. Hee.
Sam is excited to meet Nina. Because he's better than everyone else.
Shut up, Sam. Also I hope Nina destroys you because I enjoy watching
her destroy people. Someone suggests Alyssa is going to come in and
tell them they have to use each other's prints. Heh. Oh, but then
Mondo, Anthony Ryan, Seth Aaron, and Dmitry bust in. WHY. They have
the fabric. Actually they're there for advice. Dmitry has good advice
for Ken about not being old lady, because Dmitry is the best. Anthony
Ryan tells Kini to be sexier. Seth Aaron is paired with Dom and he
says she shouldn't care what the judges want, she should make what
she wants and be herself. So Sam and Mondo, because Mondo was his
mentor on “Under the Gunn”. Mondo thinks Sam's looks have been
strong, because everyone is insane. He says the only problem he has
is execution, and Sam could win this whole thing. Ugh. None of this
advice was super helpful. Dom is painting thin stripes on her leather
jacket.
Zanna
Time! Kini's print is leaves layered on each other, and he is making
a tuxedo bodice with big ruffly sleeves. Sam is making another
jumpsuit, and Zanna covers her face and points out how many damn
jumpsuits he makes. OK so he's made three, out of 11 episodes, but
he's also using the mesh, which he's done three times. And there is
maybe one overlap so that's over half the episodes where he's done
one of the two main design elements here. Not great. Ken hates
prints, and right now he needs to make all his prints work together
and master his silhouette. Dom loves prints, so they are expecting
her to win. She has a lot of work to do.
Ken
is still freaking out, and he doesn't want anyone to know. Model
fitting. No one has very much to try on. Ken just has sleeves. Kini
just wraps fabric under the jacket because he has no skirt. With an
hour left Ken is super frantic. Sam interviews that All-Stars makes
Under the Gunn look like preschool. Regular Project Runway makes
Under the Gunn look like preschool so whatever. Then he says
something about always the bridesmaid, but hasn't he won? Ken says
something nice about everyone, which is weird. He spent so long
complaining about Sam. Is he being eliminated so we're spending this
episode on his redemption?
Runway
Day. Sam has cut two pant legs for his jumpsuit and that is all. Dom
hasn't put her jacket together. Hot makeup guy Scott. Sam thinks that
because he goes through fashion blogs every day he knows what is up.
He's never seen what he's doing so therefore it must be super new and
awesome.
Alyssa
reminds them about the Otterbox phone case. Woo. Dom: the leather
coat is a white duster-length coat with full elbow-length sleeves,
with thin navy lines painted in diagonal patterns. Underneath that is
a dress with a pink and black square print. The V-neck is outlined in
a strip of black and white, and one side of the skirt is very long
and maybe pleated and the other side is knee-length. Her model never
takes off the jacket which is too bad because from what I saw in the
workroom her dress has cool straps. I don't like the lopsided skirt
but the print itself is fun. Ken: top with a V-neck and bracelet
sleeves, and a pencil skirt. The prints are all in black and white.
The top is the “static” print so it's just mottled, and the skirt
is silver and black with a jagged pattern like lightning. It's nice
but it's not very exciting. Kini: long mermaid skirt and a jacket
with puffy sleeves. This is also in black and white, with the jacket
in the “leaves on leaves” print, a deep V and black lapels. The
sleeves are elbow length, with big angular shoulders. The way the
print is makes the jacket look kind of spiky. I can't see the skirt
print that well but it looks like vertical lines. Sam: jumpsuit in a
black and white check, with a boatneck. Over this is the blue
pixelated flower print he made, in a jacket with the sleeves and the
bottom half made of that white mesh he's used before. I'm pleased to
see Nina make her unhappy face because Sam is still talking about how
he's so so much better than everyone else.
Alyssa
claims only three of them will go to the final. Kini made a red
carpet look and so the jacket has tuxedo elements. Georgina loves how
the model looks super tall and the skirt is well cut and draped. The
two ruffles on the bottom of the skirt are maybe too far, but over
all a great job. Isaac does think the purchased print is more
exciting than the one Kini designed. Nina knew this was Kini's and
maybe he could have not put the pockets on the jacket. Alyssa brings
up the phone case to make the sponsor happy. Sam talks about his
flower print and then says he picked two prints as his “secondaries”.
What two prints? The jumpsuit is a print and that's it. Mesh is not a
print. Alyssa reluctantly says the two pieces don't go but somehow it
works. Georgina doesn't like the print. Not the one he designed and
not the checks the whole jumpsuit is made out of. Nor the mesh
waistline. But he has “fresh ideas”. Also he gushes about Nina.
Stop kissing up. She likes the flower print but not the jumpsuit.
It's too slouchy and it doesn't go. Isaac thinks he was inspired by
an iPhone case because his print really looks like a phone case.
Instead of the phone case being inspired by him. Then he makes a joke
about how maybe Sam is being paid off by the neoprene mesh council.
Hee!
Dom's
print is geometric squares and circles and lines. Nina loves the way
the striped jacket is almost a neutral, and the designed print is
happy and fun. But the weird asymmetrical length is distracting. And
the pleating is on the wrong side? I'm not positive but I think the
wrap part of the dress is covering the pleats? Isaac would like the
two pieces apart more than together. They love her print. Ken talks
about his print which is not terribly exciting. Georgina likes how he
always designs for the same woman and he keeps her in mind, but today
it's not polished. She wants a bit more. Isaac calls it “a valiant
effort” and that the print is not what he notices. Nina thinks the
print he bought is more exciting than the one he designed. Also his
look is dated. Alyssa loves what he stands for but this particular
look is not exciting enough maybe.
OK
extended episode, we have 30 minutes left. Sigh. Back in the Scrap
Bin they talk about the judging and no one fights. Kini is exuberant
which is fun but he also goes maybe a step or two too far. Like the
jacket is great and the sleeves, but the lapels are too shiny. Nina
likes that he does that because he takes risks and then everything is
tailored too. Alyssa says he gives them something to judge, which is
a good way to put it. He's been the strongest all season. Dom's look
was fabulous, but the asymmetrical skirt bothers people. Georgina
doesn't like the print she designed, but she seems to be the odd one
out. Ken designs for a specific woman, who is not the most exciting
or fashion forward. He played it safe and everyone is offended as
they tend to be. Nina labels it an 80's silhouette in a sad print.
Georgina tries to disagree but Isaac talks over her. Sam's print was
fresh but Nina still hates the slouchy jersey jumpsuit with the 60's
(or whatever) jacket. Isaac is really upset about the mesh. Georgina
didn't believe the coat because the jumpsuit was so bad. OK so I
didn't hear anything good about Sam except his print? I think I heard
more good things about Ken? But apparently the judges are torn
between eliminating Sam or Ken. Oh Lord, are they about to have one
of their one-hour sewing challenges to decide? I hate that shit.
The
winner is Dom! Oh good. Kini is also in. Alyssa then says, “For the
first time this season, the judges cannot make a decision.” That is
COMPLETE BULLSHIT, ALYSSA, because you had not one but TWO non-elims.
That's twice before where you didn't eliminate anyone. So this is
actually the THIRD time this season you couldn't do your damn jobs.
Ken rolls his eyes because he's as annoyed as I am. Then she's like
“we need more time so go backstage and we'll call you.” What? You
called them out just for that? Why didn't you just finish
deliberating and then call them out out then? This is so dumb.
No
one in the Scrap Bin is particularly happy. Ken points out that if
they're going to just look at this challenge (which they claim to do
but which doesn't happen ever) Sam wins. But if they look at the
whole season it's not an easy decision. Sam interviews that he pushed
himself this week to do something different, which is hilarious. Girl
please.
Alyssa
reiterates there are only three spots in the finale. Isaac hates both
Ken and Sam's looks for different reasons. Georgina doesn't think
either of them had a fair shot tonight, and then Alyssa says they're
not ready to make a decision so let's bring them out.
OK
now that we have 16 minutes left, because we wasted 5 minutes talking
about how we weren't making a decision, NOW there are boxes and work
tables around. How are you going to have this fucking extra challenge
with no time left? Ugh. Anyway, in each box is one winning and one
losing look. You must use them both to make a new look in one hour. I
seriously hate this shit. Just pick someone to lose. It's not like
you've never picked a loser for some bullshit that everyone knew was
bullshit.
Ken
finds his winning dress from the Baroque challenge, with the cool
sleeves and cape, and Mitchell's losing dress with the mullet hem,
and he is super glad. Sam finds the fairy tale challenge, Asha's red
peplum and pants and Alexander's super boring gown. Ken basically
keeps his dress, because it's his model and the dress already fits
her. So he takes all the details off and chops it short. Sam takes
the lining and bodice from Alexander's dress and uses that with
Asha's to make a new jacket. We really saw all of five minutes if
that. Dom and Kini are super bored.
Ken:
so he just cut the bottom off his dress and put cap sleeves on it and
a collar. The stripes are gone and all the cape. Some of the chiffon
from Mitchell's mullet skirt ended up as trim. It looks good and the
hem looks good too, at least. Sam: the lining of Alexander's gown is
now a shapeless minidress, and over this is a jacket made from Asha's
and Alexander's bodices. The jacket is really big in the back for
some reason. Oh, sorry, it's a “letterman” jacket which I guess
is why he put eye black on his model for no reason. Cut that shit
out. Anyway, the back of the jacket is the bodice from the gown which
is why it looks weird and lumpy. All of this look is lumpy. Georgina
claims to like Sam's look but there are a lot of problems. Ken knows
when to stop and say “that's enough”. Isaac likes the idea of the
jacket but it's not finished. Also he likes how he used both looks
which, are they going to still get rid of Ken? Why didn't you just do
that in the first place? Why get his hopes up with this shit? Well,
then Isaac loves Ken's too, but maybe it's a little too long. This
last minute stupid challenge is for when the person you want to
eliminate did too well and someone who is supposed to stay did poorly
and you have to give them a second chance to fix it. But Ken did the
worst, and now he seems to be getting more of the criticism, so what
was all this for? Ken's skirt is too long and it's not effortless,
and Sam has shit tailoring.
Alyssa
announces everyone is writing down their votes like this is Survivor
or some shit. Then she eliminates Sam. FUCKING FINALLY. He's all sad
but just go already.
Next
week: four days to make eight pieces. And then the show is over yay!
1 comment:
Thank you again, Toyouke, for the recap. Got home late from rehearsal last night, just as they were announcing "For the first time in Project Runway All Stars history...." WHAT? I know I was pretty tired last night, but even I remembered that they had made the same statement already this season and you had called them out for it!! Cheaters! Phonies!
Don't care who wins - glad it's not Sam.
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