Previously on Project Runway: Andrea left in the middle of the night, and then Kooan quit in the workroom. Everyone interviewed about how horrible Andrea was but no one said anything bad about Kooan. Seriously, everyone was super angry with her, which was strange and also, shut up and work. Chris was especially annoying. Raul returned. The challenge was to make outfits for women on the go, and Sonjia won with a really cute dress. Buffi made a zebra print sheath with a hot pink smock over so she was eliminated.
Gunnar says he will miss Buffi’s “lightness”. Shut up Gunnar. I still don’t like you. All of Melissa’s roommates have left so she moves into the other apartment. Raul says he loves Chris, possibly THAT WAY, which just goes to show. Something. Chris says he doesn’t want to work with partners, and Fabio dryly notes “No, you made Andrea run away.” Heh.
Heidi strolls out with the velvet bag. She’s obnoxious about it, but then Nina comes out so it’s OK. Supposedly there is a thing called “Marie Claire at Work”, which is all about work and is a fast-growing segment of the fashion world and whatever. They have to create a “fashion capsule collection” that is both editorial and possible to wear in the real world. Two teams. Heh. No one wants to work in teams. Each team also has to direct a photoshoot, and the photos will factor into the judging. Winners get into the magazine. Sonjia gets to pick first for teams, so she picks Elena. The other team starts with Nathan, who picks Ven. Each person picks the next person, so Sonjia and Nathan don’t pick everyone. The teams are: Sonjia, Elena, Melissa, Dmitry, Alicia, and Raul; and Nathan, Ven, Chris, Fabio, and Gunnar. There is a giant thing about how Chris didn’t pick Raul, where Raul is insulted and Chris is all “Raul doesn’t get along with my team”. Whatever. Also it gets down to Raul and Gunnar (…heh), and Gunnar snobs that he doesn’t want to be on either team. Oh, so you want to go home then? Bye! One outfit per person, which supposedly makes it fair that the teams are unbalanced.
Tim reminds them there are no leaders, so we’ll see how long that lasts. They will be Team 6 and Team 5. 30 minutes to sketch, and only one day. Tomorrow is the photoshoot, and they’ll go straight from the apartments to the shoot so it has to be packed up tonight. Ouch. Sonjia quickly wants to delegate and have everyone do two garments for separates. Alicia likes the idea of doing two tops instead of doing a top and pants. Raul says something about pants and Sonjia asks if he can do a top like he did when he first got there, because they need something like that. Raul says no, he needs enough to cover his ass. What? Let’s at least pretend to be a team player. Over on Team 5 they decide on “Fall Into Color”. Gunnar whines that Chris, Nathan, and Ven are taking over and doing color blocking and something about the 80’s as if Gunnar and his skunk stripe are the height of sophistication. Team 6 argues over prints vs. lace. Guess who doesn’t want to do what the team does? Raul insists that his shirt looks better with lace and screw them. Team 5 divvies up the work and tells Gunnar what to do. They are micromanaging him, but I don’t care. Hey, it’s hypocritical but that’s what happens when you decide to be the bitchy queen of the season. Shopping is shopping, except for Raul buying random things, saying he’s going to use what he wants and the rest of the team will just have to incorporate his choices into the collection “because it’s about six designers, not one or two.” I wonder if he hears himself. Don’t make me put you on the list too.
Team 6 gets back to the workroom and they are missing a bag. Oo. Elena starts to freak out because her fabric is what’s missing. She has to use some jersey and will have to readjust. Melissa tries an idea that involves Raul changing his design, and he immediately says he will not because it’s not who he is as a designer. Everyone stares at him. Raul says no one is listening to him, but he’s already been eliminated so…maybe they’re not. He’s very insistent that he will be doing what he wants, and not what everyone wants him to do, as if no one else has compromised anything today. I mean, they probably have, I would assume so. Dmitry can’t believe Raul would start worrying about standing before the judges, before he’s even made anything. Meanwhile Elena has commenced her freakout. Ugh.
Chris finds a giant comb under a table and the designers establish it’s Kooan’s. Chris makes a face like he’s so upset he might cry, which, shut the hell up, Chris. Fabio says when Elena freaks out everyone just avoids her. Chris talks about her, which is stupid because they’re not even on the same team. Nathan asks Gunnar about his skirt, and someone says it should be fitted or A-line, except that during sketching someone told him to do a full skirt so what the hell? Gunnar bitches that this isn’t his aesthetic and he’s not a fucking tailor, in that angry snippy queen tone that just drives me up the wall. Shut up Gunnar. I can’t even entertain that you might have a point, I want to smack you so much right now. Raul says that this top is him as a designer, 100%. So expect it to suck. Elena’s jacket isn’t turning out right so the freakout continues. See, she hates this challenge too, but has channeled this into complaining instead of insubordination.
Tim time! Elena sighs hugely when he comes over. They explain how everyone is doing two tops or whatever, and they show off their looks which are only half done so it’s hard to tell what’s going on. Tim says he likes how Raul’s top has volume and Sonjia’s skirt is slim. Raul decides this means he’s on the right track. Elena hates her jacket, and Tim actually has to say it’s good. That doesn’t happen very often. Elena agrees to go with it. Tim likes the collection, because it doesn’t look like it came out of the same box. Team 5 doesn’t seem to have a lot of stuff, as they are describing what they have and aren’t actually showing everything. They have mostly silk somehow and random purple prints. Tim says it looks like clowns. Gunnar, of course, agrees but won’t say anything for some reason, probably he is too chickenshit to speak up. He’s “over it”. What does that even mean? Because “over it” to me says “I’m going to shut up about it now” and that NEVER happens. Tim is smart and calls Gunnar out, because Gunnar has refused to make eye contact. Tim is concerned about Gunnar’s lace looking matronly. It says “bullfighter” and “costume”. Also since when does Gunnar stop talking?
Gunnar decides he’s going to do whatever he wants. Then he talks to himself which I’m sure will just make his team dislike him. Sonjia tries to find out from Raul what he’s doing, but he mostly refuses to tell her. That’s a problem because Sonjia’s skirt has to go with it. So she decides she’s going to whatever the hell she wants, and if it doesn’t go, she’ll just have to defend herself. I’m pretty sure the reaction to team challenges isn’t supposed to be “Screw you guys, Imma do what I want”. At least, usually only one person does that. Or every person on the team. Elena, of all people, makes up a song called “Silk Chiffonzies” and says to Chris that’s his name. Him, Ven, and Nathan, because they always use silk chiffon to make impractical garments. That’s…strangely human of her. And not freaking out. Melissa points out that women don’t wear silk chiffon to work. Generally. Then out of nowhere Elena says everyone hates Dmitry’s navy blue because no one wears navy blue anymore. What? Dmitry points out she probably should have said that before the dress was half done, on his form. Elena insists she did, and Dmitry interviews that everyone hates Elena, even if they say they don’t.
Model fitting. Ven doesn’t like Gunnar’s taste level. Dmitry tries to say Ven is a one-trick pony, but can’t quite come up with the phrase at first so calls him a “one-way monkey”. Hee. The back of Melissa’s dress is crazy. A ton of frantic working. Raul’s vest has weird side-boob flaps and is pretty low, so it needs a shirt. I don’t think he was planning on a shirt. Everyone seems to be done, mostly.
Tim welcomes everyone to the photoshoot. They get three hours, and they’ll end up choosing three photos. Hot makeup guy. Elena is ordering everyone around. Team 5 appears to be working together. Chris thinks everyone is voicing their ideas. No one argues so I guess they are. Elena and Raul argue. Chris and Nathan try to pick out a picture but they can’t agree because they can’t find a picture where all garments look good. Elena seems to be arguing about everything. She hates all the props, but the rest of the team want some props. Seriously, she needs to calm down. Melissa finally loses it and says Elena should just do whatever she wants, since that’s what she’s going to do anyway. Elena is all “don’t fucking talk to me like that” which doesn’t have any meaning, but Melissa stands up to her.
Everyone goes back to Parsons so the models can get done up again and walk the runway. Guest judge today is Joanna Coles. Team 5 is up first. Nathan: wide-legged white pants, with a weird drape in front. A wide black belt, and a one-shouldered top in a purple and pink floral print. It’s a nice print, but maybe for work in a top underneath a blazer or something. At least the one side has an elbow-length sleeve. Chris: pencil skirt in a print, but somehow it’s pleated or something? A black jacket and a white shirt. The jacket is nothing exciting. Gunnar: dress with a black skirt, with side panels in the print Nathan had, and a white sleeveless bodice with a high black collar. The print is also at the shoulders. I don’t like the stripe of print. It’s so bad they subtitle one of Heidi’s comments, which is “floating soufflé boobs”. Heh. Fabio: also a dress, mostly black, with white over her shoulders. There are little cap sleeves. It’s nice. But then there’s a headband in the print. And an over-the-forehead headband, not the kind that run from ear to ear over the top of your head. Ven: a black draped top, so all folded down the front, and a white skirt. The skirt is supposed to be kind of flowy, but as the model walks she’s getting cameltoe. The photos are just OK.
Team 6. Melissa: blue sheath dress with a high poofy collar. I like the blue but the collar is silly. Diagonal zipper down the back. Elena and Alicia: pants and a black top with the jacket. So I guess the pants are Alicia. It’s not earth-shattering, but it’s perfectly nice. Raul/Sonjia: Raul’s top has vertical ruffles, and Sonjia has a blue pencil skirt. Elena/ Alicia again: high waisted wool pants, which are pretty good, and Elena’s top has mutton sleeves and a zipper up the front. Dmitry: navy blue dress with a split neckline. Actually it’s not all navy blue, it’s done in blocks. So half the bodice is navy and half black, and then switched for the skirt. Exposed zipper down the back and a keyhole right where her tramp stamp would be. Raul/Sonjia: the skirt is draped around her hips, and it’s kind of interesting but maybe only for skinny people. Otherwise it’s like you could carry things in that swag of fabric. The leather vest is not exciting.
Heidi claims both teams did well. She also claims both teams had the same score, which I don’t think has happened before. Team 5 is up first. Ven talks about black and white and a pop of color. Heidi likes the softer fabric, which makes no sense. Nina likes it as a collection, except it’s not all cohesive. I guess collections on this show are never cohesive. Chris’s skirt has the pleats that make the print less matronly. It’s interesting, and I’ll agree with Nina on that. Fabio’s dress is easy and great. The headband is dumb, but I think it’s because they liked Fabio’s turban and ropes from last time. Joanna says that she likes that Ven had a good interpretation of a classic suit. Kors and Joanna like the photo of everyone at a table because they might actually be working. Nina’s one reservation is Nathan’s look. Aww. The blouse is matronly and the pants are unflattering. They do seem to be draped weird across her hips. Nathan says that was on purpose, he wanted the “inspiration” of a skirt. Nina thinks pajama pants are not a good message. Heidi says something crazy about alternate age groups. I guess her point is 50-year-olds would wear it. Heidi hates Gunnar’s though, because the top is droopy. Kors agrees, and it seems that the fabric is to blame. For the print too. Heidi demands to know the weakest link, and Fabio says the strongest link is Ven. Huh? He knows they liked Ven’s, so he’s going to name Ven, knowing they won’t get rid of him and refusing to help them choose a loser. Nice. Chris picks Gunnar (shock) and Gunnar gets bitchy and says his look is the weakest, maybe, but at least it has his name on it. Everyone else goes with Gunnar.
Team 6 gets to talk. Back in the Scrap Bin Chris pretends he didn’t want to say Gunnar’s name. Team 6 had something modern and editorial. Nina loves Melissa’s blue dress, and she likes that there are both wide-legged pants and skinny pants. Kors thinks someone would wear that dress to the office, and I don’t know where you could wear such a giant collar, but we’ll go with it. Kors also thinks the ruffles on Raul’s top are too overwhelming. No one seems to like it. Joanna says the whole thing is commercial, which it probably is. Heidi likes Dmitry’s look too, but Joanna says there are many professions where that open keyhole in the back is not appropriate. This is why Joanna is so good. She asks things like “How is anyone going to wear a bra?” Kors pretends he can tell from the clothes they didn’t get along and they all did whatever they felt like, as if the other team didn’t do the same thing. You know the producers told him they argued. Raul and Elena throw each other under the bus when asked who is the weak link. Hilariously Raul says it’s because Elena won’t compromise her designs. Everyone not Raul says that Raul is the worst. Well, except Dmitry says Elena doesn’t have a work ethic and stresses out the team.
Sonjia calls Dmitry out about saying Elena doesn’t have work ethic, I’m not sure why, so of course Elena and Dmitry start arguing. Raul jumps in to say he can’t stand her either. The judges like Melissa’s dress, Fabio’s dress, and Chris’s outfit. They all photograph well, and they are interesting. Elena is obsessed with shoulders, the mutton sleeve was bad. Both Raul’s tops were ugly and unflattering. Gunnar cut his outfit poorly and they can’t get over the top. Team 6 had strong graphics and modern clothes, but Team 5’s photos looked like they were working. Heidi is pushing for Team 5, and says she’d find more outfits from that collection. That’s not a rousing endorsement.
Nina tells everyone that Team 6 is getting the photo spread. Woo. Alicia is in. Chris is in. Melissa is the winner! Good for her. Fabio is in. Sonjia is in. Ven is in. Dmitry is in. Nathan is in. Good. Elena is in. Oo. Raul vs. Gunnar. Oh, you know they won’t get rid of Gunnar. And they don’t. Gunnar says “Thanks for the heart attack” which would make me get rid of him right then on principle. Raul goes back to the Scrap Bin and says he’ll miss some people. He give Ven shit, but Ven doesn’t seem to care. Then he tells Elena he hates her, and there’s a pause, and she says “I don’t like you either” and he tries to talk over her which just makes him look insecure. Elena sits on the couch as he hugs everyone else and stares him down. She came out the winner there, I think. Raul says this is not who he is so he’s glad to go home.
Next time: random women, makeovers, Ven is the “I can’t design for fat women” asshat this season.