Hell's Kitchen 8/27/12--"4 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: everyone was required to teach beauty queens to cook, which mostly went well. Barbie won, somehow, because she’s decided to stop blending into the background and just float by. During dinner service Barbie further distinguished herself by bringing up crappy risotto four times in a row. But everyone is tired of Clemenza’s general suckage so he was sent home, finally.
Also, in the last moments someone walked by the camera in the dorms. Turns out it’s loved ones. Dana yells. Justin gets emotional. Everyone hangs out for a while and then everyone has to leave. Lame.

In the morning, they all run downstairs to get in a car and drive to Bristol Farms, a supermarket. Ramsey and Scott are waiting, to give them each $15 and 10 minutes to buy ingredients and make an “amazing” dish. This dish should bring the highest price possible. Dana spends almost $10 on fish. Barbie buys pork and sausage, while Justin buys seasonal vegetables. Christina tells the butcher to leave the skin on her swordfish, which is subtitled so it may be important later. Everyone is under budget, except Justin, who has managed to overspend by 77 cents. He throws out an avocado.

30 minutes to cook. Scott seems to be wandering around watching everyone which is fun. Dana yells that it’s so quiet in the kitchen. Christina has the fewest ingredients but she thinks she can still pull it off. Christina helps Dana and Barbie rolls her eyes.

Guest judges are David Lefevre, Hugh Garvey, and Christian Philippo. I don’t know who any of these people are. Highest average price wins. Justin: roasted corn, mango, jalapeno salsa with chili shrimp. It’s cooked well but is lacking “liveliness”. Average price is $28.33, which Justin feels is too low. It’s three shrimp with salsa. Barbie: pork chop with sausage and I think greens. The sausage is salty (…hee). She was adding sausage to try to make it worth more, but the judges don’t think that was a good idea. Average price is $33. Justin is pissed still. Dana: panko herb crusted halibut with shaved fennel and beurre blanc. They love it. Average price is $34. Nice. Christina: grilled swordfish, saffron rice, and shrimp. As predicted, they don’t like the skin. OK, one guy wants the skin on. Whatever. Average price is $33.67, so Dana wins. Nice. Except for the part where we have to listen to her yell about how glad she is. Dana will get lunch and one-on-one time with one of the guest judge chefs. No one gets to join her. Losers have to sort the trash for recyclables and then prep for service. Ha.

Barbie says she does this at home and is used to the smell. Why don’t you sort BEFORE you throw it all in the trash? Duh. Dana gets to go in the back and learn how to make curry mussels and stuff. The trash has been fermenting, and when Justin starts retching, Barbie tells him to make sure to throw up in the “organic” bin. Hee. Dana gets told to go put the mussels in the middle of the table, where her parents are waiting for her to hang out. That was unexpectedly nice. Dana brags mildly when she gets back into the kitchen. She goes to change and help prep, and tries to find out if it’s the regular menu today, but no one will talk to her. Oh, now that’s just rude. Dana decides no more friends. Ramsey shows up and says tonight is the night they each get a turn running the pass. DANA STOP YELLING FOR FUCK’S SAKE. The president of the casino where the winner’s restaurant will be is coming to dinner.

First table goes out without a hitch. Actually, it seems like they make it all the way to the first entrees without a hitch. Justin is up to the pass first. He’s doing well, even when Scott tries to put crab in the lobster spaghetti. Dana doesn’t answer him, so he demands an answer. Even though this is exactly what Ramsey does all the time, Dana whines that Justin is annoying. Justin thinks Dana is dragging on fish. She just laughs at him that it’ll be ready when it’s ready. Ramsey yells at her and accuses her of sabotaging Justin. Nice.

Dana is up next, and now she’s trying to prove herself. No one answers her first ticket, and Ramsey really just tells her to make them answer. Magically now everyone is respectful. Ramsey puts sugar in the risotto but she doesn’t notice. Dana is determined not to fail, but she doesn’t seem to do anything else wrong.

Barbie is louder than Dana in confessional. That’s pretty damn loud. She yells out a ticket, but she does it with her back to the kitchen, reading it off the counter. What? Ramsey has to tell her how to do it. Everyone answers her, which is nice of them. Barbie makes Justin refire a risotto, which means that Dana is supposed to refire scallops, and Justin is supposed to tell her? I’m not sure, but Barbie is not taking responsibility for the fact that Dana isn’t refiring anything. Barbie yells at both of them to talk to each other, when if Barbie had been clearer at the outset this wouldn’t have happened. Scott brings up celeriac instead of potatoes, but she catches it which is too bad.

Christina is pumped. She seems to be organizing well, until she calls Dana “buddy” and gets yelled at. Then Dana burns the cod. Ramsey says the brigade is running her (?), and then the cod is undercooked. Now everyone is yelling at Dana. She finally brings them up, and then Ramsey brings up arugula instead of spinach but she quickly catches that.

Ramsey tells them to discuss “who should stay and who should go home”. I don’t know if that’s vague enough. Barbie says Dana couldn’t hold her station and didn’t work the pass properly. That’s true. Dana just kind of shrugs when everyone tells her she was holding them back. She’s never held the pass before, and Barbie is all “it shows.” Burn. Everyone agrees with Barbie, but this is the most low-key argument in the history of this show. No one is yelling. Well, except Dana in confessional. 

Barbie hasn’t given up, she’s learned and grown and doesn’t want to go home. Justin gives 150% and can lead a team. Dana has excelled and won 4 or 5 challenges and has been consistent, even though tonight wasn’t her best night. Christina has improved and her standards have gotten much higher since she’s been there. Ramsey says he’s eliminating two of them tonight, and the first one is…Barbie? I am waiting for the twist, but no, she’s really gone. Woo! I thought the universe was going to fuck with me and put her in the final but I guess not. She claims to be proud and not bummed. Ramsey claims the last three are really close in terms of skill, and then the giant screens come down from the ceiling, as they do. To be continued!

Next time (which I think is in two weeks): final two, trip to Vegas, Penn and Teller, Wolfgang Puck, eliminated contestants (craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap). Someone will win, but we’ll have to put up with like, Robyn and Bryce.