TAR16, Recap Leg 7, 3/28/10

Welcome to Leg 7! Last time, on Don’t Always Trust a Pretty Girl, teams drove themselves through French Wine Country. Dan and Jordan get smart, Brent and Caite continue to break down, The detectives check in first for the third leg in a row, and Jordan and Jeff are FINALLY eliminated! TAR, get the hint that we do NOT need another Big Brother team on this show. EVER. Who will be eliminated. . . next? (click for more)


Arrival at the pit stop last episode:
1st – Louie/Michael, Team Sherlock, arrive at 12:35 PM
2nd – Carol/Brandy, The Lesbians, arrive at 1:28 PM
3rd – Steve/Allie, Team World Series, arrive at 1:57 PM
4th – Jet/Cord, The Cowboy Brothers, arrive at 2:36 PM
5th – Dan/Jordan, Team I Love You Bro!, arrive at 3:36 PM
6th – Brent/Caite, Team Like The Iraq Such As, arrive at 4:36 PM

L’Orrca, Champagne-Ardenne, France

12:35 AM Louie/Michael (1st)
Clue: Fly 5000 miles to the island of Mahé in The Seychelles! Take the available flight from Charles De Gaulle Airport. Once you arrive, find the marked kiosk to take a number and determine your order for the next clue.

(Toyouke: “Forced bunching...woo.”)

1:28 AM Carol/Brandy (2nd)
1:57 AM Steve/Allie (3rd) – Steve: “I’m a professional baseball coach and this is like the World Series!”
2:36 AM Jet/Cord (4th) – Jet: “I hope we go somewhere that speaks English.” (Toyouke: “I love the cowboys. I feel like I would be able to tolerate their stupid.”)
3:36 AM Dan/Jordan (5th) – Jordan: “I bet we’ll have to do something in order.” (Auburnium0513: “Numbers mean an order? Really? Thanks for letting me know.”)
4:36 AM Brent/Caite (6th)

Teams arrive in Paris at Charles de Gaulle and get their seat assignments in the following order:

1- Breant/Caite – who get row 7.
2- Steve/Allie – who get row 10.
3- Dan/Jordan – who get row 15.
4- Carol/Brandy – who get row 25.
5- Louie/Michael – who go and grab a bite to eat with . . .
6- Jet/Cord

The Amazing Red Line then takes teams from Paris to Mahé, where teams slowly deplane and run to the numbered kiosk.

Teams arrive at the kiosk in the following order:

1- Brent/Caite
2- Steve/Allie
3- Dan/Jordan
4- Louie/Michael
5- Carol/Brandy
6- Jet/Cord

Teams then discover that they will be flying on helicopters to the island of La Digue. Only three helicopters are available at a time, so the first three teams will depart, and the second group will leave an hour later.

Teams fly through the air and arrive at the La Digue Clue Box in the following order:

1- Brent/Caite
2- Steve/Allie – Allie: “Dear God, thank you for creating this beautiful sight with my Dad. Thank you.” (God: “Hate to burst your bubble, darling, but I did it myself. In six days. Beat that.”)
3- Dan/Jordan – Jordan, singing: “We’ve got a rainbow following us.” (Kmanpat: “Honey, you don’t need one following you. You are one.”
4- Louie/Michael
5- Carol/Brandy
6- Jet/Cord

Teams now get the Detour Clue.

DETOUR:
Turtle Toddle OR Ox Trot
*Turtle Toddle: Teams must use a banana to lure a 100 year old, 500 pound tortoise across a field to the finish line. Once there, team members each pick up a bunch of bananas and carry them 1.5 miles to the fruit merchant who will give them their next clue.
*Ox Trot: Teams must take a cart to the nearby clearing and fill it full with a provided pile of coconuts. Teams must lose NO cargo and transport the cart via oxen to the fruit merchant who will give them their next clue.

1-Breant/Caite choose Ox Trot – Thanks to the Amazing Editors, we get a shot of the lone coconut that falls out of the cart. (Toyouke: “Oo, I wondered why the Detour instructions had showed the coconut and had the Rattlesnakes of Discontent.” Auburnium0513: “Loser Gong!”) As they are heading towards the harbor to find the fruit merchant, Brent’s ox breaks. (Toyouke: “Oh yeah, that ox is broken.“) When they arrive and the fruit merchant tells them they don’t have all the coconuts, Brent breaks too, and tries to quit in frustration. Caite: "It's so unfair we are unobservant!" (Toyouke: “I love that someone obviously called ahead to tell the guy there was one coconut left.”) But they don’t, and they go back and get their coconut.
2-Steve/Allie choose Turtle Toddle – and in the process, leave their luggage behind. Oops. (Toyouke: “Sigh...never leave your bags anywhere.”)
3-Dan/Jordan choose Ox Trot – who name their ox Box, after their father who owns a boxing company.
4-Louie/Michael choose Ox Trot
5-Carol/Brandy choose Turtle Toddle – They get the uncooperative tortoise, so they bald snark to Ox Trot. Thanks to the Amazing Editors, we get a shot of the lone coconut that falls out of the cart. (Toyouke: “I love that the guy is just standing there, pointing at the coconut. “) Carol and Brandy end up going back for the coconut.
6-Jet/Cord choose Ox Trot – Jet: “We’re usually loading feed into these things.” Thanks to the Amazing Editors, we get a shot of the lone coconut that falls out of the cart. This is getting to be a habit. (Auburnium0513: “Manhandling the natives would certainly be a penalty.”)

Teams complete the detour in the following order:

1- Steve/Allie
2- Dan/Jordan
3- Louie/Michael
4- Brent/Caite
5- Jet/Cord
6- Carol/Brandy

Teams are then instructed to swim into the harbor and take a motorboat to Saint Pierre Island. At the marked buoy, the boat captain will give them their next clue. Teams arrive at the boats in the following order:

1- Steve/Allie – where Allie realizes that the bags have been left, and that they probably aren’t getting them any time soon. Steve: “It’ll be ok, at least I have our money and passports.” (Toyouke: “Well...at least he brought the Amazing Purse.”)
2- Dan/Jordan – the boys are topless and slapping each other. (Toyouke: “Um...I think Jordan just told his brother that slapping him will make his nipples hard.” Kmanpat: “I like how Jordan slaps his brother’s chest and nothing moves.”)
3- Louie/Michael
4- Brent/Caite
5- Jet/Cord
6- Carol/Brandy

Teams arrive at the buoy in the following order:

1- Steve/Allie
2- Dan/Jordan
3- Brent/Caite
4- Louie Michael
5- Jet/Cord – (Toyouke: “Not enough shirtless cowboy!!”)
6- Carol/Brandy

And teams come to the sixth roadblock.

ROADBLOCK:
Time to take a deep breath!
In this roadblock, one team member must dive underwater and find seven bottles tied to the bottom of the ocean. The roadblocker must untie one bottle and bring it to the surface. The boat captain will then drive the boat within view of the island. Team members must then swim to shore and empty the contents of the bottle, which form a treasure map that leads the team to a precious treasure – the seventh Pit Stop.

Phil does the task description. In shorts. UNDERWATER. (Toyouke: “This task description is almost as awesome as the one in Russia where Phil was in his underwear.”)

The following team members complete the Roadblock.

1- Steve
2- Jordan
3- Brent – (Toyouke: “Brent shirtless is disappointing.”)
4- Michael
5- Cord
6- Brandy

After much bottle grabbing and swimming and map completing, teams complete the Roadblock in the following order:

1- Steve/Allie
2- Dan/Jordan
3- Brent/Caite
4- Louie/Michael
5- Carol/Brandy
6- Jet/Cord

Teams are now instructed to walk the marked path on the map. X marks the spot of the PIT STOP of the seventh leg of this racearoundtheworld. The last team to check in MAY be eliminated.

1- Steve/Allie – who find out that 7-UP sponsored this leg of the race. (Leg 7, get it?) So they get a “Positively Uplifting Reward” of a seaside dinner, massages, $7000 each, and all the 7-UP they can drink. Very Survivoresque, no? (Toyouke: “That looks suspiciously like a Survivor reward.”)
2- Dan/Jordan
3- Brent/Caite – who want to get rid of the lesbians. Brent: “I think all the teams are anonymous on that.” As are. . .
4- Louie/Michael
5- Carol/Brandy – who get a break thanks to . . .
6- Jet/Cord – who leave the bottle on the boat and have to go back and get it. (Toyouke: “Why are they so stupid?! “) Good job, Cord.

And Jet and Cord are . . . not eliminated! This is the second of three non-elimination rounds, but the cowboys will have to complete a Speed Bump in the next round.

ORDER NOW:
1st – Steve/Allie
2nd – Dan/Jordan
3rd – Brent/Caite
4th – Louie/Michael
5th – Carol/Brandy
6th – Jet/Cord

Next week: Malaysian Flag Balancing! And Jet and Cord run into issues. Again. Until next time!