Previously
on “Top Chef”: everyone had to make pretty food for the
Quickfire, and no one ate any, they just took pictures and saw how
many likes they could get. What was nice about the challenge is that
no one knew who won until Judges' Table. The Elimination challenge
involved cooking for Beefsteak, which is a big charity event where
everyone dresses up and then eats with their hands. Apparently also
you were supposed to make beef, which people whined about. Everyone
complained, but first of all they didn't tell the contestants beef,
they just said meat, and second, they let Phillip win because he made
lamb chops on the bone which was the kind of eating-with-our-hands
thing they wanted. Kwame still was struggling, but since he had a
good idea/poor execution, he was viewed a little better than the
other two fish dishes which were poor ideas. Chad's fish dish was too
fussy and had microgreens so he was sent home. Oh and Karen won the
Quickfire, not that it mattered since she was never in danger of
going home. (click for more)
Last
Chance Kitchen: Chad and Jason had 25 minutes to make a beef dish
that Tom was going to eat with his hands, and also you only have
knives for five minutes. Chad undercooked his beef cheeks so Jason
wins again.
You
guys, how is this going to work? Are they going to get rid of someone
tonight? Are we going to actually spend time in each restaurant and
they wanted a two hour episode? Is it a situation where everyone did
a terrible job so they don't eliminate anyone and then next week they
just do it again? Also I am not happy they moved this show to
Thursdays because now it's on at the same time as “Project Runway:
All-Stars”. So...this recap might not go up until Fridays. Sadly
until the show ends. I know. But I can't stay up that late. Stupid
Lifetime.
Back
in the Stew Room right after the elimination Isaac talks about how he
didn't expect to be on the bottom. I mean, a huge pile of sausage
totally works for the challenge. He's annoyed because what he calls
“tweezerfied” food is winning. Phillip is insufferable of course
because he won so now he's going to be himself all the time. Bleh.
The
next morning Kwame calls his business partner about stuff for the
restaurant they're opening. Amar knows it's Restaurant Wars and
Phillip wants to do front-of-house. Fine. Everyone knows it's
Restaurant Wars because there are eight of them left and that's how
it works. It's like the unconventional materials challenge on Project
Runway except for you always know the timing of this one.
Padma
greets the contestants with Bill Chait. They know it's Restaurant
Wars...and there is a terrible song. Don't do that, you guys. Padma
tries to psych them out but it fails. Anyway, you know the drill. Two
teams, build your own restaurant, blah blah. They draw knives but
they're all blank except for Amar and Karen. So you get to pick your
teams this season. Amar picks Kwame, and Karen picks Marjorie. Yeah
those make sense. Amar's team adds Jeremy and Phillip, and Karen
picks Carl and then is stuck with Isaac. Amar's logic is that Phillip
really wants to do FOH so he can stick Phillip over there where he
won't bother everyone. Padma then says each team will serve BOTH
lunch and dinner, but you still only get 24 hours to get ready. They
have until midnight tonight, and three hours before lunch tomorrow.
Oh and one more thing: everyone on the team must take a turn being
either the executive chef or the front-of-house for a service.
Interesting. I like this twist.
Amar's
team immediately says they're doing “modern American” and they
all agree. Phillip takes over and tries to make everyone agree on a
name and whatever. Kwame is pissed because he doesn't want to deal
with Phillip. Same, Kwame, same. They eventually decide on “District
LA” which is kind of dumb but not the dumbest name they've ever had
on this show. Jeremy wants a crudo. They aren't arguing about the
menu yet.
Karen's
team appears to agree on California/Mediterranean, or at least
Marjorie and Carl think so. Isaac makes a comment about Cajun, but I
can't understand him. I think he's bitching that he doesn't do that
type of food. Carl stares at him. Then Marjorie wants to pour soup
tableside because that's “prettier”. Somehow this shows off
technique. Isaac doesn't have enough refinement, apparently. Who
pours soup tableside? Whatever. Carl points out they can do something
for dinner entrees that takes a long time. Isaac throws out ideas and
they might be good or bad, I can't tell, but Marjorie especially is
really bitchy about telling him they're all dumb. Also their name is
“Palate”. “District LA” is better.
District
LA decides on who is doing what and when, and Kwame speaks up last
and is FOH at lunch. He's waited tables and thinks he can do it.
Palate somehow has Isaac as executive chef at lunch. You all bitched
about him not being refined but you didn't stick him in FOH? I'm
suspicious. Now that we have two hours we have to waste time on
shopping for tables and glasses and shit. Phillip has too many ideas
but he says he doesn't mind getting shot down all the time because
he'd rather get shot down than regret not saying anything. Thankfully
Kwame vetos mason jars for glassware. Palate spends $2900 of their
$5000 on tables and chairs. Why so much? Whatever. No one ever cares
about design.
I
think they have more for food? You know, I don't care about budgets.
They do the usual splitting of two people to Restaurant Depot and two
to Whole Foods. Marjorie gets Carl's list over the phone and she's
pissed because he's not giving it in the order she wants. Why didn't
you do this in the car? This is not Carl's fault. That was all the
shopping that happened so there doesn't seem to be drama about how no
one has enough proteins or something. Oh, Kwame asked Amar for some
good bacon.
Everyone
moves the kitchen equipment around to set up how they like. District
LA did not buy Kwame any bacon. Amar, come on. Kwame bitches at
Jeremy for some reason, even though I can't imagine he forgot who he
spoke to on the phone. Jeremy is not having it. There's pancetta for
backup anyway. Palate is making a bread course in addition to the
total of ten courses for the two services. Carl has to cook a terrine
and his meat isn't cold enough so that might not work. Jeremy is
making risotto ahead of time, and he says cooking it a la minute is
ridiculous and impossible, so I'm expecting the judges to complain
about it. Phillip brags about his strawberry and champagne salad and
how much everyone loves it so that will probably also be terrible.
Oh, plus that's his dish for dinner when he'll be FOH so someone else
will have to assemble.
As
everyone goes home to relax Isaac interviews about how he's glad to
have the two women on his team. He then says they're ego-less and
attitude-less which is hilarious. Phillip's salad is of course
stupidly elaborate and has a million components. It needs to be
simpler. The arugula is dressed with just olive oil and lemon juice,
so Kwame asks if they can do that ahead of time. Or at least mix
those two things ahead of time. Phillip says if one of his chefs
asked him that he'd just say to fucking work harder. I get that he
wants his dish to be perfect but you also have to adjust to the fact
that someone else is going to be executing it. The more shit you put
in there the harder it will be for someone else to do it exactly the
way you want. I wonder if wait times at Phillip's restaurant are
annoyingly long.
In
the morning Isaac gets a phone call home. His wife tells him if he
comes home with a douchey LA accent she will divorce him. Hee. Also
Jeremy and Kwame say they should do well if egos don't get in the
way. Uh huh.
District
LA has Kwame on FOH and Jeremy as executive chef. Phillip is out
helping Kwame set up the dining room since he seems to have
experience. Marjorie is FOH for Palate and Isaac on executive chef.
Isaac is an executive chef and he says in confessional that you will
like him and fear him. Palate's lunch menu: marinated beets with baby
greens, pepitas and garrotxa (Marjorie), pork and bacon terrine
(Carl), steak salad with peanuts, herbs and shallots (Karen), and
seafood stew with braised fennel (Isaac). Garrotxa is goat cheese.
Carl's terrine didn't come out exactly the way he wanted. District
LA's menu: asparagus salad with crispy egg and truffle vinaigrette
(Jeremy), corn and sage veloute (Kwame), roasted chicken breast with
polenta (Amar), and roasted salmon with ratatouille (Phillip).
Waiters
show up and get put to work. Marjorie tells her servers the plan is
for people to be in and out in 45 minutes. Karen is worried because
she's picking up Isaac's dish? I guess because he's expediting? So
she's completely blaming him for all of that. I mean rather than
asking she's just like “You didn't tell me anything” and then
just standing there.
So
maybe the two parts is for the two services? So after lunch service
is over the episode ends tonight? Hmm. Marjorie wants to be in charge
and she hopes to set the tone for the day. Karen and Isaac have a
painful conversation about when to pick up stuff, and I'm not sure
who is at fault because I have never worked in a kitchen, but Karen
seems to ask a general question about times (I guess “how long
should I spend fixing my dish”), which Isaac answers, but then
Karen thinks he means specifically right now, which is not what she
asked. The problem is Isaac's response sounds like he doesn't know
what he wants. Marjorie interviews that she thinks Isaac is going to
fail. District LA's kitchen looks good? Seems to be smooth.
The
judges show up and seem happy. When Kwame goes back and puts in the
judges' order, Jeremy announces they're jumping the line and
everything stops for everyone else. Phillip interviews that this is
terrible because the judges care about the service for everyone else
and Jeremy is making a horrible mistake that Phillip himself would
never make. I'm pretty sure they don't care about other tables but
fine. It's a weird clusterfuck in terms of getting waiters to take
the plates out but they arrive safely. Kwame's soup is good (guest
judge wants more salt but is a loner on that) and they love Jeremy's
salad. Karen says in confessional she's surprised about how well
things are going, clearly because she thought Isaac would screw up.
Yeah, so much for the female chefs being attitude-less, Isaac.
Marjorie is complaining that no one is leaving the tables when
they're done eating. That is annoying but what are you going to do?
OK
so I know I rolled my eyes at Phillip being superior about
concentrating on the judges, but it turns out there are two courses
and Jeremy shut down everything for the judges. As in, while they are
doing the second courses for the judges, no other food is leaving the
kitchen for any other table. Yeah...I think you could have continued
to put out salads and soup while you cooked mains for the judges. Of
course Tom has noticed this also. Also that there are no utensils.
Oops. Phillip's vegetables are not cooked properly. Amar's dish is
chicken breast, which he's made several times and it's not that
great. Overall District LA seems maybe uncreative but tasty and
well-seasoned. Jeremy is getting grumpy.
Marjorie
is so desperate to get people to leave the restaurant she's offering
them free champagne if they move their asses. See this is why I hate
camping at tables. I have friends who do it and I always imagine the
servers are thinking about how I should fucking go home and it makes
me uncomfortable. She is flailing so when the judges show up no one
is at the hostess stand. Of course not. Tom hates the terrine because
it's chewy and Spam-like. Not good. The beets are good but maybe
they're underwhelming? District LA has a really long line. Jeremy is
blaming Phillip, but Phillip says he's doing what Jeremy tells him. I
think Jeremy is slowly going insane. Karen's dish gets rave reviews.
Katsuji! What's up, Katsuji. He's a diner. Isaac's dish is fine if
not earth-shattering. Tom says District LA's appetizers were better
but Palate's entrees are much stronger. Too much emphasis on
expediting. Palate finishes serving their food so they're cleaning
and I think looking towards dinner service. District LA has tables
that were just now seated. How did they get so far behind? Was
stopping to do all the judges' dishes that time-consuming? Apparently
so. Jeremy says they have four minutes left so I think they had a
time limit to the service. And they still have five or ten tables
that don't have food.
Next
week: dinner service, Karen isn't doing what she's supposed to,
Phillip is Phillip, Tom is sick of crudo. Apparently dinner service
is terrible.
No
Last Chance Kitchen because no one was eliminated!
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