Monday, July 9, 2012

Hell's Kitchen 7/9/12--"10 Chefs Compete" summary

    Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: nothing happened with Kimmie and her burns, but she went back to the kitchen and made Robyn look stupid as much as possible. I know Robyn isn’t the best chef by any stretch, but Kimmie looked mighty suspicious. Patrick and Royce both failed, and the entire women’s team also got kicked out. Robyn and Kimmie never actually came to blows, and the fight seems to be about how Robyn thought Kimmie, her “friend”, should not call her a bitch. Yeah. Anyway, Patrick was finally sent home, and Robyn was sent to the men’s team, with the promise from Ramsey that if she continues to complain, he’ll know it’s not the women but her. (click for more)

Also Tiffany and Barbie sort of got into it. Since Robyn’s gone from the team, that’s the biggest conflict now so I’m sure they’ll get into it today.
Even Christina’s happy to be rid of Robyn, as she tells Tiffany they have to get over all their arguments. That’s pretty telling, seeing as how Christina and Robyn never really got into it. Robyn promises the men that’s where she wants to be, as she tells us in confessional that men don’t have “periods” and “catty bullshit”. Oh, Robyn. You didn’t need to go there. Justin says she seems to want to be there, but they won’t tolerate any arguing and nonsense. She promises more, but they cut it like none of the men believe her.
Ramsey greets them the next morning with a craps table. WE ALREADY HAD THIS CHALLENGE. Seriously, what is with all the “get random ingredients and cook something” challenges? Is that a thing now? Is that the new trend, making shit up on the fly? Unless you’re going to go “Chopped” on it and throw in like, marshmallow fluff, I really don’t care. Roll the giant die, get a letter, choose ingredients starting with that letter, make a dish. You get 10 seconds to name something, and then I guess everyone has to make a dish with whatever. The men (and Robyn) end up with heirloom tomatoes, daikon, dragon fruit (good job, Robyn), edamame, and chicken. Yeah. Brian is super annoying while Robyn is standing around, but then chokes and can only come up with edamame. At least there is a sort of Asian theme going on. Tiffany gloats, but let’s see what they get. Women get chicory (not so easy, is it, Tiffany?), lamb, turnips, Brussels sprouts, and truffles. I think the women did slightly better.
30 minutes, and everyone has to work together to make one dish. The men are just standing around trying to figure out what’s going on. Barbie is shouting about everything and ignoring her lamb. I think they assigned each person one of the ingredients to work on. Barbie claims to be good. Brian wants to do a sushi roll with the dragon fruit. It’s sad, because he’s kind of cute, but his confessionals bug. Barbie tells someone not to put things on a plate? I guess she didn’t think they were good enough? Everyone plates together.
The women roasted the Brussels sprouts and the chicory. The lamb is braised well, sadly. The Brussels spouts aren’t perfect, and Barbie smirks in confessional that Dana should have worried about them more. 1. I’m pretty sure you told her not to put the other ones on the plate, and 2. God, I want to smack the smirk right off her face. PLEASE tell me she eventually goes down in flames. If she wins I’m going to be pissed. The men made a chicken roulade and rolled the daikon with the dragon fruit, which ended up being delicious, as well as the edemame puree. The chicken is slightly dry, though, because Royce sliced it too early. The men win. Well, the men plus Robyn. She’s thrilled. They get to go to Vegas for a day, to eat at Ramsey’s restaurant and hang out in a high roller suite. Ramsey blames the sprouts for the loss, so Kimmie claims to be mad and “shaking” because of Dana. Punishment is to stay up all night because there is pulled pork on the menu tomorrow. BBQ means an all-nighter. Kimmie is crying, again, and look, I don’t mean to make fun of her for crying in frustration, or in anger, because I have often done both of those things. But I also do not claim to be “street” and I don’t talk about how if we were “on the street” that I would kick someone’s ass. Ramsey asks her what the deal is, and she says nothing, and he lets it slide even though this is the second time that’s happened (her crying and him asking her about it).
Everyone is pissed, and Kimmie punches the punching bag and claims to be picturing Dana on it. See, that’s what I mean. You can’t act tough and talk about how you’d like to beat up on people when you cry all the time when you lose. Dana talks about making this a bonding experience, but Kimmie just rolls her eyes. The men fly out, and I would hate to be on a plane with them. The suite is awesome, obviously, and there’s a giant buffet and a gang of large-breasted short-skirted women. Poor Robyn. Couldn’t you get like, one Chippendale? Or maybe she would rather look at the women, I don’t know. Tiffany bonds with the pig. She seems to have lost it slightly. The men and Robyn meet Carrot Top. Carrot Top? Really? That’s…what? Really? Someone calls him “Mr. Top” which is stupid and also fits in with this prize. Everyone parties and dances poorly. OK, someone put a giant digital countdown clock in the middle of the dorms with a super loud alarm on it, so the women would know to go check the pig and baste, flip, check the coals, whatever. You have to get up and hit the giant red button on the side of the grill. It looks like a regular gas grill, not that big, but it is highly entertaining to me that there is an alarm that goes off every sixty minutes and a giant red button. Everyone is in bathrobes for some reason.
In the morning, everyone sort of makes it to the kitchen and starts prep. No one wants to greet the guys, who are stupid about it, of course. Robyn is confused because somehow the guys do everything differently from the women. Ramsey tells them they’re getting guests again: the men get some American Idol people (look, I never watch that show so I have absolutely no clue, it’s the season 9 winner and a season 10 finalist) while the women get David Beckham. Christina says she doesn’t watch soccer, but “what girl doesn’t think David Beckham isn’t smoking hot?” I don’t. I don’t, he doesn’t do it for me at all. Also, I think Posh should be here too. Right? You know she would give withering glares and disdainful comments about everything.
Becks rolls in with his son Brooklyn. Brooklyn Beckham. Sigh. Dana is thrilled to be assigned to the table. The BBQ is on a pulled pork pizza. Sorry, “flatbread”. Clemenza brings up gross scallops that are too greasy or something. Ramsey pours off some liquid off the plate. Nasty. The American Idols snicker. They’re fine the second item. Dana has to redo the pizza? I’m not sure if she was trying to move it and she smashed the thing, or if it wasn’t made right, or what. I thought the oven was in the back of the kitchen, but it appears to be right by the table. Becks says there’s no rush, which is cute. Tootling music follows. Christina says they’re failing at using the pizza peel, so I guess when they try to pick it up it gets all scrunched. Finally it works. The men are having the same problems, or at least burning things. Robyn jumps in to take flatbread out of the oven and serve it, which turns out well and somehow no one cares or objects to her doing it. Tiffany gets out the last order of scallops, so the women can move on to entrees.
Robyn is very vocal, and is impressing Brian. It sounds like she stepped in and took over, and no one cares, not even Royce. Then Royce brings up three Wellingtons, all at different temperatures. Oops. Then he says four minutes, and then eight minutes, then five. Sigh. Ramsey actually calls the entire team into the back room, so he can yell at them privately. Oh, I was wrong, Robyn isn’t getting yelled at. He tells them to get a grip. Robyn tries valiantly to cook everything by herself. The women screw up an order, and Tiffany brings up cod instead of sea bass. Barbie smugs that she should know the difference, but they never say if she confused them or if she thought the order said cod. Sadly, we find out it was the former, because when she goes to refire the order, Tiffany is cooking cod again. That’s sad. Even if you didn’t know which was which, shouldn’t you be able to think “that one is wrong, I’ll cook the other one”? Finally she gets it right. The men have returned, but Royce brings up dry pork chops, and Clemenza has brought up nasty fish. Becks likes his pork chop, and I have noticed that he’s holding his fork in his right hand all awkward. Is he trying to do the American thing? Instead of British, where you hold your fork in your left hand and your knife in your right but you don’t switch ever? It’s just weird, is all. Barbie brags that she’s doing it right. The women are two tickets away from being done, but the men haven’t served any entrees yet, and Royce has just told Ramsey ten minutes. What? Hilariously, Robyn counts down the blowup in confessional, and the editors intersperse her counting with Ramsey getting pissed. Ramsey calls them over to show them the empty counter next door, because the women are done. He brings over all the women but Dana, who he tells to “stay on dessert”, so I guess we’re still doing dessert. Robyn is embarrassed and pissed. Brian gets mad at Tiffany, as does Justin, but she feels that since they suck so bad, she can do whatever she wants and boss them around. Everyone eventually gets their food.
Ramsey tells the women they’ve won, and this was one of the best services they’ve had. Then he tells the men’s team the only person who did well was Robyn. A woman. Heh. Brian puts up Royce and Clemenza. Clemenza is immediately pissed, and curses so much I’m not sure what his actual protest is. He thinks Royce and Brian. They all seem to think Clemenza screwed up a bunch of scallops. Brian is named for the flatbreads. Royce claims he is not the weakest link and “everyone” knows it. Right. Robyn doesn’t know who to put up, and Brian tells her she has to be decisive. So she picks Brian and Royce. She also suggests they let Ramsey make the decision, which is quickly voted down. Heh.
Robyn says their nominees are Royce and Clemenza. Royce says he beats himself up for his mistakes, physically. The women laugh at him. He is always trying to do better. Ramsey doesn’t think he’ll get better fast enough. Clemenza can cook and has passion, but today he just screwed up scallops. He promises he’s not done. Ramsey commands both of them to take off their jackets. Damn. He takes Royce’s jacket, says “Give my regards to Ralph”, and kicks him out. Oo, he told Roshni to keep her head up, so Royce must really be bad. Royce claims to be better than everyone else and whatever, bye. Clemenza gets a dressing down, and then Ramsey says he’s a mess and needs a clean jacket. That was a great fakeout. Especially since Royce is gone and I imagine him standing around at the door, waiting for Clemenza to join him, and then slowly realizing he’s the only one eliminated. Ramsey tells Clemenza to stay clean for one service, at least. Clemenza thinks there won’t be another chance for him if he screws up again.
Next time: which is next week! All-Star game! There is an eating competition, secret package, everyone freaks out somehow. Tiffany and Brian fight.

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