Previously
on “Project Runway”: there was a helicopter ride and people were
supposed to make editorial looks inspired by New York or whatever.
Mah-Jing was in the top again but then Cornelius won because of
course he did. He just got saved so of course he would win so Erin
and Dexter could be mad. Then all of a sudden Heidi started talking
about how multiple people will be out and then Dexter and Nathalia
were both eliminated. (click for more)
Finally
down to six people. Mah-Jing is cutely thrilled. Cornelius pretends
feelings and says he's sad Nathalia's gone. But not Dexter. Heh. Erin
says she's happy to be on the top again. I'd forgotten she made the
top three with a shiny pink tweed dress with a dust ruffle. I feel
like she's supposed to win and the judges/producers have been
slamming her for a few weeks so when she wins we can all pretend she
overcame...something.
Heidi
tells everyone there are two challenges left until Fashion Week.
Or...there were six collections and there are six people now. Go big
or go home. Rik thinks they're leaving the country, which is
hilarious. Instead they are in some abandoned warehouse with some
cars and trash can fires and some guy from Lexus. Sigh. You did this
challenge before and you aren't going to do better than a seat belt
coat. This is an “avant garde” challenge which I put in quotes
because this show doesn't do this properly. ALSO it's an
unconventional materials challenge! Tim says there are some pieces of
metal and whatnot that should “inspire” their look, plus $150 at
Mood. So it's a mix of fabric and metal pieces, not the inside of
cars. Boring. Two days so twist alert in effect. Like...make a
ready-to-wear look to go with your avant garde look.
There's
duct work and I guess tools and chicken wire probably. Rik thinks
maybe he didn't get enough metal stuff. They ride to Mood in the
cars, which is dumb because you know they just did some shots of the
cars driving around and made everyone ride in a van. Erin buys that
Big Bird yellow color she used in the last unconventional challenge.
Mah-Jing buys denim. Swatch barks at everyone. Tim gets on his hands
and knees to see what Swatch is barking at, then accuses the dog of
“just wanting to see [him] in this position!” OK, hee.
Someone
wasted money making fancy metal stenciled signs for people's buckets
of crap. Cornelius I think is planning to make butterfly wings out of
duct work. Mah-Jing makes “seashell coral” shapes. He has no idea
what he's doing and it's clear from how he's talking about his look.
Erin loves these challenges, you guys. It's all about creativity and
true genius or something. Rik is also just throwing things on the
dress form. Roberi tries to make one cohesive look instead of a dress
with a bunch of crap on it. Erin makes a fucking print. Erin. Don't
talk about how great it is to be challenged by unconventional
materials and then do the same exact shit you always do. She wants to
do a paper doll dress, which is a thing I KNOW I just saw like a
month ago. If I didn't know better I'd say she copied it, but the
collection showed at the same Fashion Week they all did, I'm pretty
sure. Still, you aren't such a genius, ERIN, because someone else
thought of it too. Rik's look is good, I like it, but it's not avant
garde I guess. Erin makes flowers out of her crap and talks to
Mah-Jing about glue. Specifically that her glue might not dry in
time, or at least the editing would like you to think that not
listening to Mah-Jing's advice will ruin her.
Day
Two. Erin comes in and immediately gasps because the glue bubbled up
like foam as it dried and all her flowers look terrible. Mah-Jing is
just like, girl I told you. So Erin has once again wasted most
of her time doing some pointless embellishment.
Tim
Time! It says “Six hours left until end of day”, just FYI. Rik
has some safety pins which is kind of cliche. Student work. Also the
back is not as refined, but better than the plain white back he had
last time. Tim says to go overboard. Roberi appears to have curved
sheet metal around the dress form. It looks good and smooth. Also he
wants a helmet or mask for a reveal. Tim says it looks OK probably.
Mah-Jing describes his coral reef idea to Tim and shows him his
copper mesh that is kind of crumpled with copper wire swirled through
it. Tim tells him it's heavy and now he's worried the strapless dress
won't stay up. For real, my sister just got married and her dress
probably weighed 25 pounds. They tied the skirt on so tight we
thought she'd need scissors to take it off. But the alternative is
the skirt falls off her because it was so heavy. Tim labels this
costumey, and Mah-Jing says in confessional that isn't that the point
of avant garde? Erin describes her paper doll dress, over pants, and
she wants it to sit with just the tabs holding it up. But it looks
like the “dress” is just going to be mesh with those dumb flowers
on it. Tim cautions her to not injure her model with an unwearable
design of metal mesh with metal flowers. Laurence says she's making a
stairway dress. More square blocky shoulders. The skirt is like a
step pyramid. Tim doesn't point out she does that same shoulder all
the time, but says it's graphic and the rest of the bodice is too
organic. Cornelius is making a scary face, like how sometimes
butterflies have patterns in their wings to frighten predators. Right
now, though, it's a black dress with a hot pink oval over her
stomach. Tim says “maternity”.
Cornelius
still wants to use his duct work, so now it's a host being devoured
by a parasite. Erin makes giant clown pants. Mah-Jing looks around at
everyone and rolls his eyes about how Tim said he was too “costumey”
because paper doll dress, parasite, “bathroom tiles”, and
“Robocop”. Cornelius complains he wants his model and then said
“I wish I had boobs”. Heh. Model fitting. Erin loves her look of
course. Mah-Jing's dress is heavy. Laurence asks Roberi's model about
if she speaks the same language as he does? And he's like YOU SPEAK
SPANISH ALL THIS TIME?!?! because he's been struggling with his
English. Ha! That was great. Laurence I think made steps and tiers
out of chicken wire and then wove leather strips through it. She also
thinks Cornelius has given his model a penis because there is duct
work attached to her crotch. Mah-Jing talks about bringing it which
is not a good sign for him.
Runway
Day. Tim shows up to give them an hour so I guess no twist? Good.
Erin pastes flowers over her model's nipples so she can wear the
chicken wire thing without a bra. Not hot makeup guy Scott.
Mah-Jing's dress is really heavy. Roberi is still planning on a mask.
I think Mah-Jing's dress is too heavy, especially on top. Laurence
made a very short dress.
Guest
judge is Shiri Appleby who is from “Unreal”. Cornelius: tight
black dress, knee length, with sleeves and a high neck. There is a
length of pink fabric making a U shape over her waist, and some blue
and some yellow on the sleeves. The duct work is painted black and
hard to see, but there for sure is a duct coming out of her stomach.
He tried, I guess. Mah-Jing: dark denim strapless dress with panniers
over the hips so they're wide. Then over the hips and chest are the
copper mesh with wire. The model has her hands on her hips and I feel
like she's holding the dress up. Rik: black shift dress covered in
metal. There are tile-like pieces on one shoulder, and a panel of
dangly bits. It looks the most like real clothing, which is both
impressive and not great, for an avant garde challenge.
Erin:
super wide bright yellow pants. Over this is her open mesh with
yellow “flowers” around her chest and a piece of yellow metal
across her hips to make it look like she has a peplum and also to
keep her model from flashing everyone. I do not get “paper doll
dress” from this look. Laurence: short black dress. Seriously,
that's what it looks like. I know there is chicken wire and leather
strips in the skirt and the top has those square shoulders she always
does but I honestly can't see much of the details because it's all
black. It ,looks vaguely shiny. Roberi: short black dress covered in
curved metal pieces, kind of like armor. I'm impressed with how great
the metal looks, not lumpy or anything. She's also got some fabric
over her face. I like the armor-like quality of it although it's not
super-weird.
Everyone
gets to stay today. Roberi talks about draping metal and
aerodynamics. He's mixed conventional and unconventional materials
very well. Plus Heidi likes the face mask. Zac calls it cubist. The
guest judge wishes it was more “surprising” which is so
nonsensical. Nina says something about Robocop and how it's too
costumey, but it's clear she's not that upset. Mah-Jing's dress just
kind of looks crumpled up close. Also he explains he couldn't put
more copper on because of the weight. Of course that's what the
judges wish he had done. Cornelius smirks because he's a dick. The
unconventional material is a decoration instead of part of the look.
Rik wanted something that was still wearable, and they love the mix
of textures. It's not the most avant garde look here, but it's
integrated and Nina wants to look more closely at it which is a good
sign. Heidi loves it because of course she does. I could see her
wearing it. She also pretends that “avant garde” doesn't mean
“crazy shit no one would ever wear in real life” except I feel
like there should be at least a hint of that?
Cornelius
talks about parasites. This dress is not great. It's a plain black
dress made of neoprene, with a big cowl neckline. It looks like a
hoodie put on backwards. And ducts. Nina says whenever anyone talks
about the future it always has tubes. Hee. She says it's scary, but I
want to say she's OK with that. The tubes come out of her uterus and
the ones on her back attach on her butt, so the placement is a
problem. Laurence can't talk about her look, just saying she wanted a
crazy dress. She says when she thinks about her fashion, it's all in
French, so Heidi tells her to say it in French and they'll translate
it. So she says EXACTLY WHAT SHE JUST SAID IN ENGLISH. Goddammit
Laurence. At least say some more interesting shit or what is the
point? Heidi wishes for some non-black. Actually I think everyone
wants it to not be in black. Plus they acknowledge it's the same
shoulder as always and this dress is not really a risk for Laurence.
Erin talks about paper dolls even though her wire thing is not like
that. But of course everyone loves it. I can't roll my eyes hard
enough. But I guess because it's a color they love it. Plus from the
back you can see all the glue on the mesh.
In
the Scrap Bin everyone acts like the judges just HAVE to nitpick
everything. Secretly they love all of it, I guess. They like the
contrast between the copper and denim of Mah-Jing's look, but it's
not polished. An execution problem. Cornelius had some good
execution, and they keep saying how his look is weird and makes them
uncomfortable, but no one says it's bad? I don't know, I feel like in
this situation making the viewer uncomfortable is a perfectly fine
outcome for an avant garde look. Laurence's dress is safe for her,
because they have seen the shoulder thing so many times. Plus it's
too short. Zac wouldn't let anyone wear this dress. Roberi made good
lines and put a lot of work into his look. Nina just sniffs that
she's seen this before, but Zac points out this is one of the
best-executed versions of this look. That's true. Heidi for some
reason is pleased that she asked the designers before the runway show
who should win? And Rik is the only one who raised his hand. It's a
beautiful dress that's done well, even if it's not super avant garde.
Erin's model claims the mesh top isn't painful, just heavy.
Somehow
Erin was feminine. Sure. I guess we tore her down enough so now it's
time to praise her. Rik did a great job and had the best execution
today. Mah-Jing sort of did OK? Maybe enough to make it? They don't
seem to be slamming him that much. Cornelius made a provocative look,
which Heidi argues is not a bad thing.
Erin
is the winner, because the universe is like “Fuck you, Toyouke,
Erin should win this whole thing!” I take petty satisfaction in how
she has to go to the Scrap Bin and congratulate herself because no
one is there. Laurence and Rik are in. Roberi is in too. Mah-Jing was
too random, Cornelius had “unflattering hose placement”.
Cornelius is in, because of course he is. Tim Gunn Saves always make
the finale. Mah-Jing is out, and I love him. Mah-Jing, I will buy
clothes from you though. He made it much further than I thought he
would.
Next
week: whatever, you guys. I hate this show. Apparently more
unconventional bullshit.
3 comments:
Thank you again, Toyouke (did I spell that right?) - Your comments are always thoughtful, humorous, and in this case, right on the money. At first I thought they had pre-picked Erin to win, then Laurence, and maybe now you're right that it's Erin. The real disappointment is that so many of us who love Project Runway in the end hate the show and really just love fashion and Tim Gunn (and maybe Mood). I live on the other side of the planet, so I never see this real time, and this week I may skip it completely and just look at the stills on the site after reading what you wrote here.
Just one question - how is it that after so many repeatedly hideous and vulgar personal fashion choices lately, Heidi still feels qualified to judge in the area of taste? Are you as puzzled as I am?????
I know. One of my favorite memories is still when Nina said something about how short, tight, and shiny was really tacky. That's Heidi's whole look right there.
Watched the recording last night due to a late rehearsal, but read your recap first Toyouke to get myself ready.
Same shoulders, same denim, same fussy decorations, but oh, interesting use of tiles and copper sheeting, but they give the win to their "redeemed favorite?" I know, I know - it's all a game, but when they ignore innovative and well done in favor of, well..., their favorite. Let's call it a wrap and give the prize to Erin.
While all six of these designers were likely to go to Fashion Week, they've won the prize already.
I agree with you Toyouke - shiny, tight and short - that's Heidi all right!
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