Thursday, August 7, 2014

Project Runway 8/7/14--"Welcome to the Future" summary

Previously on Project Runway: we had both an unconventional materials challenge AND a team challenge lumped together. All had to make clothes out of “movie” items, which meant film reels and cellophane and whatever. Sandhya’s team was a disaster, not made any better by Sandhya’s immunity and initial idea of “let’s all just do whatever”, and when Hernan got snippy with her she went straight to Tim about it. Their team ended up on the bottom, because apparently using the same technique to make all three dresses is far too boring. Instead of blaming Hernan, who came up with the idea, everyone decided they hated Sandhya’s look the most, so that Carrie could be as passive-aggressive as possible when asked who should go home. This continued when Carrie was sent home. However the winner of the challenge was Amanda, who wrapped her model in cellophane and then hung string off her. It was terrible and now she’ll be full of herself. Ugh. (click for more)

Hernan talks to the other boys in his apartment in the morning and says how Sandhya would have gone home because she didn’t push herself. Whatever, Hernan. Amanda brags about how winning while immune tells the judges you are awesome. Sean’s pissed at Angela for dragging the team down. I can’t believe the judges called her out on that, but then again, I am not that surprised.

The runway is covered in Marie Claire covers and just Tim, no Heidi. Anne Fulenwider, editor in chief, appears and says that Marie Claire is 20 years old. Heidi has a weird confessional about how she had just turned 21 and moved to New York and etc. Tim had already been working at Parsons for 12 years at that point. Heh. Nina was a poor intern, and Zac was 14. Yes. Anyway, the challenge is to “be inspired by your past, to create a look that would appear in the pages of Marie Claire 20 years from now”. Really they just want futuristic looks based on whatever aesthetic the designers like. Also I think they want the challenge to be super vague so when the producers tell them who should win and who should lose they will have an easier time making up reasons to back that up.

30 minutes to sketch. Mitchell gets all global warming about it with a wetsuit. Everyone is using paper and pencil and not those fancy HP tablets they’ve used in past seasons. Finally everyone gets to go to Mood, with regular money and not that weird product placement season-long budget thing. Amanda brags about how she has an advantage because she’s been in Mood before. Big deal.

One day. I mean let’s always assume they have one day challenges because that seems to be the norm. When everyone gets to the workroom there are pictures of all of them. Supposedly they were all alive in 1994. Amanda is wearing a quilt. She’s so proud. There are a couple of baby pictures but mostly people are recognizable. Korina is dressed like Blossom which I find hilarious. Emily is 21 with a huge fro and attitude. Alexander doesn’t want to be safe. Sandhya claims to be done after two hours. Huh? Samantha thinks everyone went dark, while Mitchell mocks how everyone made grunge, as if he wasn’t FIVE YEARS OLD in 1994 and he totally remembers everything. Shut up Mitchell. Samantha tells us in confessional that cliques are forming but she’s not concerned with being friends. Translation: she’s very upset no one likes her.

Tim Time! Sean knows he has to keep everything clean and unwrinkled. Angela is working with her time in the corporate world, but she hasn’t started sewing yet. Mitchell says “my future is wet.” Yes. His finishing is not clean enough. Tim also hates the tutu-skirt he has designed. Kristine mentions “Clueless” crop tops and skirts, and the opposite of that which is grunge. Also floating straps, however those are going to work. Emily has a big cowl neck, and she was going to maybe have it turn into a purse? But that is too gimmicky. Sandhya does have a basic dress done, but she plans to do a bunch of embellishments, strips of cut out fabric and safety pins and I think there was more in there. Tim tells Amanda her picture looks like she’s wearing a quilt because he is awesome. It’s too bad though because Amanda thinks this is a compliment. She is making separates with a sheer drape. Tim tells Fade not to be subtle. Char has a vest. Alexander wants the top of his dress to look like a separate piece from the bottom for some reason. Tim tells him as long as it’s going to look like separates you might as well make separates. Plus, puckering. Alexander freaks out because it has to be perfect.

Model fitting. Alexander is showing signs of the 500 yard stare, because his model has uniboob and he is behind and in a fugue state sometimes. Hernan’s top is weird and strappy and his model’s boob keeps popping out. Amanda laughs about her bell bottoms, which is not one of the decades she is supposed to be using. Alexander is starting over, somehow making a whole new dress instead of just a new top. I don’t know. Was the skirt not done? He scrounges up enough leather to make a top.

Runway day. Two hours. Hot makeup guy Scott. Hernan appears to be taping his top down. I thought that was illegal? Sean tears up a Mood bag to make a hat. Poor Angela is tearing around all crazy. She claims that’s just her. Sandhya’s embellishments appear to be two metallic strips that are cut so they look like metal that’s been scored so it bends? You know? But it looks a little cheap. Alexander’s whole dress is now whatever fabric he was going to use in the skirt, which looks weird and thick, like carpeting.

Guest judges are Anne Fulenwider and Amanda de Cadenet, fashion photographer. Kristine: short white dress with some sheer pieces. The sheer and solid pieces are cut in such a way that they suggest a crop top with spaghetti straps. Over that is a green quilted coat, and the sleeves are solid about halfway down her bicep. Below that there’s just rings of fabric. The coat’s pretty cool. Hernan: when the model comes out it looks like a boring black dress, but then the front of it is attached at each shoulder, so as she unsnaps it or whatever, it hangs down at her hips and reveals the strappy top. Which seems to not be flashing everyone today. Mitchell: basically a wetsuit, in gray with side panels in black and some piping in turquoise. He put matching pants instead of a bubble skirt but it’s basically a wetsuit now. Amanda: bell bottoms and a matching bra top in some weird non-color. Is it black? Is it brown? Is my TV just too old to show it? Over this is a sheer shirt. Maybe it’s navy? There’s some straps too. The sheer shirt is the worst part but the whole thing sucks. Angela: pink sleeveless jacket, with one white lapel down her front, paired with a very short matching pink skirt. I feel like I could find this in a department store right now. Emily: a crop jacket with a big hood that the model tears off to reveal a dark jumpsuit with a leather belt, cropped pants, and a V in front and back. It’s fine but not futuristic? I feel like you could find this now too. Hot though. Samantha: short full skirt in a gray tweed, and a cropped boxy jacket in white leather with black sleeves. There’s also a big black cowl neck like a scarf. It’s cute.

Kini: big black capelet to her waist, and then tight pants and a black blouse with full sleeves and one shoulder cut out. What? How is this new? Whatever, we haven’t heard from him all day so he’s probably fine. Fade: loose tunic and crop pants, in horizontal stripes of different shades of blue. It looks dyed as opposed to sewn stripes. Sean: black dress and a dark blue coat that is only slightly shorter than the dress. The dress has a turtleneck and there’s a hat but really there is nothing happening here. Char: teal pants, kind of loose, with one black hip, and a black sleeveless top with a high cowl neck and cut outs in the back. The black on the hip blends with the top so when she stands still it looks like the top is asymmetrical. Korina: white pants that look like harem pants and are also cropped, with a bright yellow top. Over this is a black duster made of mesh, I think. Or maybe only one side is mesh? I have no idea. Alexander: short A-line dress made of some kind of fuzzy fabric with a leather yoke. The hem is frayed. Sandhya: short pink sheath dress with a high narrow neck. You know, where her shoulders are exposed. Over this are two stripes of metallic fabric that are like half-tubes. The fabric is cut crossways to make a bunch of thin pieces, basically. The whole thing is tacked down over her shoulders, then loose along the skirt but tacked down again on the hem so it moves strangely. I guess that’s futuristic.

Char, Fade, Samantha, Korina, Amanda, Kini, Mitchell, and Hernan are safe. But first Heidi tells Amanda everyone hated her look. “But like three models walked those pants!” Not in that weird shade of ass brown or whatever it is. Go away. Angela talks about one-sided lapels but Zac says “futuristic stewardess”. Also it’s too short for a real workplace, not that that matters a lot around here, but Zac is like “you need time for workplace tailoring” which is dumb because no one gets any time. Does he mean “you need time for this kind of look and you have none so you shouldn’t have attempted it?” Sometimes Zac is a jerk for no reason. The idea of a new take on a suit is solid but this particular one is terrible. And Zac points out a weird tiny flap near the bottom of the hem on each side of the skirt that is on purpose. Weird. Sandhya was going for a look that didn’t borrow anything from menswear. OK. Her pink is a little darker and has more blue in it than Angela’s so Nina declares it refreshing. Heidi didn’t like it, but she does admit everyone will remember it. Actually Sandhya thought far enough ahead to not put the metallic fabric over her butt so she could sit down without squashing anything, which is a nice touch. Also pockets! Emily talks about hoodies and jumpsuits and upspeaks everything which is kind of annoying. It’s stunning and hot, which I agree with, but I don’t know how this is futuristic. No one really explains that. The judges all want to order it, except Zac I assume. And Nina is above these things because she didn’t really like it.

Alexander’s frayed hem looks even worse up close. It didn’t fray evenly at all. This gets called “maternity” and also “potato sack”. It’s not pretty, and they whine about how this future is depressing but they never said the future had to be happy. I mean really. Alexander tries to explain that this was his second attempt which calms them a little. Kristine wanted to use grunge. This is the outfit Nina wants. That jacket is fab but the dress looks terrible. Nina mentions layering and I think it’s one sheer piece and then the crop top and skirt are separate pieces that go over it. As opposed to one piece with sheer panels. It doesn’t look that great without the jacket, I don’t think. Heidi loves it too. The solid pieces are leather. I just think the top looks too simple. Zac makes noises about “seeing who you are as a designer” which is so meaningless. Sean’s jacket is super wrinkled and both the jacket and the dress have really janky hems. Judges are torn on the hat. No one likes a turtleneck, but supposedly the fabric has like a sheen so that is futuristic?

In the Scrap Bin Angela is on the verge of tears about her critique and all the shots of the other designers are hilarious. They all have this deadpan “Bitch please” look. Her look is not very good up close. Zac tries on Sean’s hat and acts dumb. Tim is so offended by the jacket he refuses to let the model put it back on. Emily’s outfit is great but Nina has SEEN IT. Kristine’s jacket is actually neoprene. I still think the dress looks cheap. Maybe it’s the sheer? Not sheer enough? They love it, anyway. Sandhya’s dress is certainly editorial, and memorable. It’s maybe not the greatest dress ever but it does have things going for it.

Emily is in. Sandhya is the winner. I don’t get her stuff but I am behind the idea that her outfit was the most memorable. When she gets back to the Scrap Bin everyone fake claps but Korina won’t even pretend to clap. Rude. Kristine is in. Sean is in. Alexander is in. About time Angela was eliminated. Before she had a total breakdown, I mean. She doesn’t think her look was that bad. Tim comes in and basically says she shouldn’t be here. I mean he pitches it as “this is the wrong environment for you” but you know what he means. Then my recording cut out so who knows what happened.

Next week: my DVR says they have to take vintage men’s suits and revamp them so they become womenswear. Interesting.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love the cut and dry ( and snarky ) way this blog is written. Thanks for the entertainment!