Thursday, November 7, 2013

Project Runway All Stars 11/7/13--"Sip Into Something Sexier" summary

Previously on Project Runway: avant garde clothing inspired by bugs. Elena freaks out while working, much like Helen from last season. A lot of people went literal with this one, which was not surprising. Mychael won, with a cool-looking gray cocoon with bright green highlights. Daniel had ugly fabrics and was sent home. That is about all that happened. (click for more)

The producers told the designers they were getting a night off. Lies. Of course Alyssa is there waiting for them. You might also notice the club is COMPLETELY empty, so…clearly something is going on. Viktor is dressed like Mondo. Today’s challenge is to choose a cocktail from this club’s menu, watch the cute bartender (sorry, “cocktail architect”) make it, and be inspired. By the ingredients or process or whatever. Elena immediately says she has no idea how to be inspired by a drink. Make a cocktail dress inspired by a drink? Come on. This is not the hardest thing they’ve had to do. They only get $100.

Mychael goes first and then gets to pick the order. The drinks sound mostly normal. Korto asks Jeffrey if he would like to taste the rim. Ha! I think everyone is probably going to go off the color of whatever. Viktor is wearing a newsboy cap, studded blazer, shorts, and knee-high socks, and has a fan. Yes. Irina gets picked last but doesn’t complain about it because I guess she’s pretending this means everyone is threatened by her. Sketching is the usual. Mood is the usual. You get the idea.

Elena talks about how Viktor is her friend but it’s hard to work together. I guess. I’m not sure why that’s there. I think Jeffrey says he is making one leg on his dress. He had a passion fruit cocktail. Passion fruit = Vietnam = traditional dress. Melissa is relieved to still be in the competition. Elena now gets an interview about all the things she’s done and celebrities she’s dressed, which is kind of worrying editing. Chris is trying to put a lining because he has sheer chiffon? But it’s tableclothy? Whatever, he’s worried. Melissa asks if his model will be totally naked, and Chris says no, because he is a homosexual and is not interested in that. His delivery was funny. Maybe he’ll double the fabric? Experimenting time. Viktor spent half his budget on one piece of fabric with a church printed on it. He does all the construction on his current clothes so he’s fine. Korto says all her fans know her for her print. We do? Sure. Viktor vs. Korto print battle.

Zanna appears. Viktor seems to be good. Jeffrey says he was upset because the judges implied he was not considerate of the model. You put a bag over her head. Come on. He now has velvet with burnouts. Seth Aaron has a hot pink that is not easy for every woman to wear. Chris’s dress is sheer, and possibly a gown. Mychael says he sees “nips and tips”. Hee. Melissa has her usual fishtail mullet hem that she did a bunch of times on her season. Elena appears to be in good shape, even though her dress fabric blends into the table. Zanna says everyone’s designs are “refreshing” and that “every cocktail has a twist”. Make an accessory! Woo! You can use your scraps, or someone else’s scraps, or modify something from the accessory wall. That’s not so bad.

Seth Aaron brags that he was already making something. Korto is going to make her accessory last because whatever. Model fitting. Chris’s chiffon has a design on it, like macramé, and he was going to put the lining over it? What? Of course it looks bad so he just decides to double up the chiffon. Korto’s mannequin is too big or something.

Runway day. Begin frantic working. Korto makes a belt. Viktor puts horsehair on a clutch. Hot makeup guy Scott. Everyone trash talks each other. Not as much frantic working as usual, which is nice. I guess most people were in good shape today.

Guest judges are designer Rebecca Minkoff, and Nate Berkus. How is Oprah’s interior designer qualified to judge cocktail dresses inspired by cocktails? Who knows. Irina: short gold sheath dress with a peplum. It’s all metallic and looks stiff, like it’s made of small plates. The top of the dress (from the bustier part to her throat) is sheer black. It’s open in back with the sheer sticking out. This was inspired by a cocktail called “Strawberry Fields” so I guess that’s how that is going to turn out. It’s not strawberry colored and I have no idea how it’s related to the cocktail. Chris: beige slip dress with the macramé or whatever on top like a loose netting. And thin rhinestone chains from the back of her neck fanning out over her back. It’s not very exciting. Mychael: purple short dress with a wrap skirt and a very low V. Over the hips he’s put petals, or leaves, or something. Random pieces of fabric. Jeffrey: sleeveless dark pink dress that hits below the knee, in velvet with a pattern burned out. There is also a sparkly collar. It looks kind of raggedy. Elena: white dress with cutouts along the sides of her waist and on the front. The top has a high crew neck and the cutouts are all on her chest above her boobs. It does look futuristic.

Seth Aaron: short strapless dress in black with a bright pink center panel and a black belt. There’s a piece over her shoulders, sitting on the top of her chest. It’s sort of like he made a bodice with a keyhole, except that the top part is very tight but it looks like the part right over her boobs is too big and gapes. Also very tight leggings over her heels. Melissa: hot pink sheath dress, no sleeves, and a high stand up collar and fishtail hem. I feel like Melissa made this dress several times on her season. The back is low-cut with an inset panel in yellow. Korto: green strapless dress with a full mullet skirt. The print is mostly green with a little yellow, and black vertical piping. There are black straps holding the front and the back of the dress together. Viktor: the fabric with the church on it was all cut up. I think he’s cut along the lines of the print, and then resewed in a new pattern. The pieces are long and come to a point right between her boobs, and then there’s a bandeau bra. So the top has al lot of skin. The front and back of the skirt are longer than the sides, and it looks like it’s open in the front? Like a wrap skirt? The narrow strips also come together in the middle of her back. It’s very interesting looking.

Alyssa decides she’s going to wear the winning design somewhere. Seth Aaron, Mychael, and Irina are safe. Viktor wanted “fresh and new”. He cut it perfectly. They don’t like the weird flap on the bottom, which looks like the model is going to flash everyone, but they are in awe over the top. Korto made something fun. They love the fabric, but the patent leather belt is too much. Actually Isaac doesn’t think that. Nate and Isaac fight over the belt and if it’s good or not. Chris and his dress are next. Nate says he should win because the dress looks like thousands of dollars. This is why Nate is not qualified to be here. It’s a slip dress that is so close to the model’s skin tone she looks naked. But everyone talks about how great it is because the universe loves to thwart me in this manner. Melissa was thinking of watermelon which is why she picked that color. I do like the color. The neckline and hem are too much and she looks lopsided. Elena made her dress out of neoprene. Everyone basically says she’s ripped off Balenciaga, but they try to say “We want to see Elena, not Balenciaga” instead of just saying she’s copying. Elena goes off on a tangent about how she’s an avant-garde designer and this is ten steps down from what she normally does but on her season they whined about it and blah blah. Jeffrey talks about the passion fruit. The jeweled collar is cheap looking, and when Jeffrey says they didn’t have enough money, then Georgina says maybe he should have not used anything. The other excuse is that his model is smaller than his dress form, so once he fits the dress, he can’t put it on anything. Isaac says he never had the right size mannequin when he was actually doing things so that’s no excuse.

Jeffrey tells the Scrap Bin that no one ever uses a dress form that is not the same size as their model. Sure. Viktor’s bodice was incredible, but the skirt was flashing people. They love Chris’s because it is time for the judges to begin smoking crack. Elena’s dress is something maybe they’ve seen before, but it’s cool. Isaac is tired of hearing her talk about how much trouble she’s having. Korto had a lot of ideas but maybe they didn’t work. Isaac gave it a high score though. Melissa’s model looked lopsided. Jeffrey is begging to be sent home, Isaac thinks. They talk about the taste level, and how the dress fit is really not the issue.

Elena is in. Viktor is the winner! Yay! Alyssa is wearing Chris’s dress too. Whatever. Korto is in. Melissa is out, and they make sure to tell Jeffrey he was just barely in and stop screwing around. She doesn’t think her dress fit poorly.

Next week: another stupid fucking commercial for some stupid fucking show. Lifetime, I would like to know what is happening on MY show next week. All this stupid crap does is make me determined NEVER to watch whatever show this stupid woman is on.

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