TAR20, Recap Leg 4, 3/11/12

Welcome to Leg 4! Last time, on Stacking Watermelons Was On My Bucket List, teams raced from Argentina to Paraguay. Rachel and Dave imploded and not only used their Express Pass, but got the only penalty on the Roadblock. Art and JJ have a good leg, and cause them to finish first, but Vanessa and Ralph have a hard time stacking watermelons and find they are neck and neck with the twims, who can’t string harps or balance bottles on their heads. And the eye candy departs. Who will be eliminated. . . next? (click for more)

Arrival at the pit stop last episode:
1st – Art/JJ, Team Patrulla Fronteriza
2nd – Brendon/Rachel, Team Sparkles
3rd – Joey “Fitness”/Danny, The Jersey Meatheads
4th – Bopper/Mark, The Kentucky Hillbillies
5th – Nary/Jamie, The Fembots
6th – Rachel/Dave , Team Free Ron Again!
7th – Kerri/Stacy, Team Double Bubble
8th – Vanessa/Ralph, The Dating Divorcees

Escalinata de Antequera, Asunción, Paraguay

(Toyouke: “I find it confusing that a show with such highly skilled cameramen, they couldn't find one shot for Phil on top of the steps that DIDN'T have graffiti in it.”)

5:10 PM Art/JJ (1st)
Clue: Fly 600 miles to Turin, Italy! Once there, find a marked Ford Focus and drive yourselves to the Lingotto Building to get your next clue. You must book your tickets with a travel agent first.

(Toyouke: “That is a cool building they have to find.“)

9:59 PM Brendon/Rachel (2nd)
10:00 PM Joey “Fitness”/Danny (3rd) – Danny: “There’s a lot of hot girls here in South America.”
10:08 PM Bopper/Mark (4th) – Bopper: “My daughter is on seven respiratory medicines. I’m running this for her.” Oh, now that’s a kiss of death. Bopper: “Ooh, Italy! Somewhere tropical! Hey, Mark, how many times a year do you go to Italy?” Mark: “Three or four.” (Toyouke: “Somehow Mark's whistling is less annoying than the meatheads discussing hot girls.”)
10:09 PM Nary/Jamie (5th)
10:10 PM Rachel/Dave (6th)
10:45 PM Kerri/Stacy (7th)
12:15 AM Vanessa/Ralph (8th)

Everyone drives to the Travel Agency to get flights in the following order:

1- Art/JJ
2- Brendon/Rachel
3- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4- Nary/Jamie
5- Rachel/Dave
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Vanessa/Ralph – Vanessa, looking at BB Rachel: “Are those sparkles? Holy Disco Ball Batman!” (Toyouke: “Girl, that is not a disco ball. There are plenty of things you can say to insult Rachel that are accurate.”)
8- Bopper/Mark – who neglected to read the part that they needed to go to the travel agent first and went all the way to the airport. (Toyouke: “Did it say in their clue to go to a travel agent first? Did I miss that? Because I think that's an odd thing that Americans don't always realize. I'm defending Mark and Bopper's mistake, is what I'm saying.”)

So, Art and JJ get to the travel agent and find a 9:15 AM flight to Turin, getting in at 10:35 AM the next day. Everyone makes this flight, except for Bopper and Mark, who make the 11:50 AM arrival. Teams arrive at the airport as follows:

1- Art/JJ
2- Brendon/Rachel
3- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4- Nary/Jamie
5- Rachel/Dave
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Vanessa/Ralph
8- Bopper/Mark

Once they arrive, Bopper and Mark are sitting with the other teams, and only then do they realize that they aren’t on the same flight as everyone else. (Toyouke: “However, I will not defend not checking to see if you got tickets on the best flight.”) They scramble to get on, but miss the flight. Thus, the flights shake down as follows:

Flight 1, arrives at 10:35 AM
1) Art/JJ
2) Brendon/Rachel
3) Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4) Nary/Jamie
5) Rachel/Dave
6) Kerri/Stacy
7) Vanessa/Ralph

Flight 2, arrives at 11:50 AM
1) Bopper/Mark

We now make our way to Turin, and the teams arrive and find cars in the following order:

1- Art/JJ
2- Brendon/Rachel
3- Vanessa/Ralph
4- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
5- Nary/Jamie
6- Rachel/Dave
7- Kerri/Stacy – who have difficulty with the manual transmission.
8- Bopper/Mark

Teams now drive themselves to the Lingotto Building. Teams arrive and proceed to run to the top in the following order:

1- Art/JJ
2- Brendon/Rachel
3- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Nary/Jamie
6- Rachel/Dave
7- Kerri/Stacy
8- Bopper/Mark –Mark: “"I know a little Italy. 'Italy'." (Toyouke: “Hee.”)

Art and JJ open their clue and find. . . a Fast Forward!

FAST FORWARD:

Recall (if you can, since we haven’t seen one in three seasons) that a fast forward is a task that can be performed to allow one team to skip all remaining tasks and head directly to the pit stop. However, each team may only use their fast forward power once on the race, so they must decide when it is more advantageous to use it. In this, the first (?) fast forward on this race, teams must land a remote controlled helicopter onto a model of the Lingotto Building on top of their partner’s head. Once complete, they get their next clue and skip all remaining tasks and travel directly to the Pit Stop.

(Toyouke: “A Fast Forward! And Phil didn't say it was the only one of the race!”)

Teams decide to go for the Fast Forward in the following order:

1- Art/JJ – which keeps them in first place, if they get it. Which after much whining on the part of the team, they do.

So – helicopter flying, Fast Forward for their team. Art and JJ get their Fast Forward and travel to the PIT STOP at Piazza Castello.

All the other teams get the fourth roadblock clue.

ROADBLOCK:

What goes up must come down!

In this roadblock, one team member must rappel down the center of the building, pick up a clue on the way down, and meet their partner, all in two minutes time. Once the task is complete, teams get their next clue. If they fail to meet the time limit, they must go back to the top and start over.

The following teammates take the Roadblock:

1- Rachel R.
2- Danny
3- Vanessa – who needs two tries.
4- Jamie – who needs two tries.
5- Rachel B. – who convinces Dave that they should do it, even though he wants to go for the Fast Forward. And then when she wins the argument, he pouts. That reminds me of someone. . . (Toyouke: “FREE RON! Oh wait...I think Dave is being an ass. Not like she's being a saint, but "if you want to continue to act as you are" and "she needs to change her demeanor"? That's pretty asshat.”)
6- Stacy
7- Bopper – (Toyouke: “Did Bopper just say "Guidoville"?”)

After much rappelling, teams complete the Roadblock in the following order:

1- Brendon/Rachel
2- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
3- Rachel/Dave – and Dave continues to berate Rachel for her decision.
4- Nary/Jamie
5- Vanessa/Ralph
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

Teams are now instructed to drive themselves to Museo Nazionale dell’Automobile. They are to use the Active Park system in their car to parallel park and then go inside the museum and find the 1916 Ford Tin Lizzie to retrieve their next clue. (Toyouke: “"Teams must parallel park"? LAMEST. CHALLENGE. EVER.”) Teams arrive in the following order:

1- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
2- Brendon/Rachel – in which Rachel starts to flip out.
3- Rachel/Dave
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Nary/Jamie
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

Teams then go inside and search for the Tin Lizzie. Teams find it in the museum in the following order:

1- Brendon/Rachel
2- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
3- Rachel/Dave
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Nary/Jamie
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

Teams receive a 2 cent euro with a building on it that happens to be the Mole Antonelianna, which the teams now have to drive themselves to and make their way to the top in order to get their next clue. In order to help them find it, there is conveniently located a bevy of Santa Clauses congregating near the museum. (Toyouke: “Why...are there Santas? And shouldn‘t a group of Santas be a jolly?”)

Teams now make their way to the Mole Antonelianna and arrive in the following order:

1- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
2- Rachel/Dave – Dave doesn’t follow the directions given to them by the Santa Clauses, prompting more bickering from Rachel, and more asshattery from Dave.
3- Nary/Jamie
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Brendon/Rachel – who thought, among other things, that they were given a penny and had to spend it in some way to get their clue. (Toyouke: “I like that Rachel thinks they have to use the money.”)
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

Teams arrive at the top of Mole Antonelianna in the following order:

1- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
2- Rachel/Dave
3- Nary/Jamie
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Brendon/Rachel – (Toyouke: “Rachel, Brendon wants to call it quits because 5 minutes ago you threatened him with quitting. The rest of us at home would love if you would follow through on that. FREE BRENDON!”)
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

And we get the Detour Clue.

DETOUR:
Clean That Statue OR Name That Salami
*Clean That Statue: Teams make their way to L’arte Marmi to use the provided equipment to restore a statue to its previous pristine state. Once complete, the artist will give them their next clue.
*Name That Salami: Teams drive to Gastronomia Salumaria and taste 14 salamis. Then, teams run a half mile to Piazza Vittorio Vinetto to name all fourteen correctly to get their next clue.

(Toyouke: “This Detour seems lopsided. Clean a statue, or memorize 14 different types of cured meat?”)

1- Brendon/Rachel choose Name That Salami
2- Rachel/Dave choose Clean That Statue – Dave: “That’s way to much meat for me to handle.”
3- Vanessa/Ralph choose Clean That Statue – Vanessa: “I haven’t eaten that much meat since high school.”
4- Joey “Fitness”/Danny choose Clean That Statue
5- Nary/Jamie choose Clean That Statue
6- Kerri/Stacy choose Name That Salami
7- Bopper/Mark choose Clean That Statue

Teams complete the detour in the following order:

1- Rachel/Dave
2- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
3- Vanessa/Ralph
4- Nary/Jamie
5- Brendon/Rachel – (Toyouke: "Okay, lets settle this. If you came on this show to get a free trip, then you should probably quit and spend some of your winnings on a trip. Or do you not have any money left? NO ONE THINKS THIS SHOW IS LIKE BIG BROTHER YOU HARPY. And when he's saying how she tells him she doesn't want to marry him, I have two thoughts. One, if you don't call her bluff on that, she'll do it forever, and Two, she looks like BreadFairy0124 in that shot.”)
6- Kerri/Stacy
7- Bopper/Mark

Teams find now that they must drive themselves to Piazza Castello, the PIT STOP of the fourth leg of this racearoundtheworld. The last team to arrive MAY be eliminated!

1- Art/JJ – who win $5000 each.
2- Rachel/Dave
3- Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4- Vanessa/Ralph
5- Nary/Jamie
6- Brendon/Rachel
7- Kerri/Stacy
8- Bopper/Mark

Phil tells the Kentucky Boys that they are the last team to arrive. Then he invites Art and JJ in, who graciously gives half their leg winnings to help Bopper’s daughter with her medical bills. And THEN Phil reminds the boys that he never said they were eliminated. This is the first of three nonelimination legs, and they are still in the race. I’m sure there’s a Speed Bump somewhere.

ORDER NOW:
1st – Art/JJ
2nd – Rachel/Dave
3rd – Joey “Fitness”/Danny
4th – Vanessa/Ralph
5th – Nary/Jamie
6th – Brendon/Rachel
7th – Kerri/Stacy
8th – Bopper/Mark

Next week: Onward to Bavaria! There is Neuschwanstein and Beer Steins and Roaming Gnomes and Beard Twirling and Yodeling. Oh my! Until next time!