Friday, September 10, 2010

Project Runway 9/9/10--"What's Mine Is Yours" summary

Previously on Project Runway: everyone make new clothes out of bridesmaid dresses! It was actually a good idea, even if the dresses they got are nowhere near as bad as the average “ugly bridesmaid dress” you can find on the internet. Everyone continues to hate Mike C., and the producers refuse to show us any footage in justification. The designers actually have to display their clothes to the public, for votes. Ivy decides Mike C. is telling everyone she is the bitch of the show, which, 1. you are, and 2. it would be pretty damn unlikely that the producers would not have footage of that if it was happening; they would totally air it. So, Mike C. wins again, which seemed to be the judges’ way of flipping off the rest of the designers. Since Gretchen and Ivy pretty much have their heads explode. Peach made a weird top and sad ruffle peplum so she was sent home. (click for more)

April is lonely because she’s left alone in her apartment. She doesn’t want to have to move in with the other girls, because she knows they’ve been talking about how young she is. April promises she doesn’t deal with bullshit and will voice her problems. Mike C. says he’s won twice and he feels like Gretchen. Hee. He’s kind of hurt that no one was excited he won. I mean, it is sad, but it’s also kind of sad that he’s sad. You know? Andy can’t respect Mike C. because he thinks he’s the weakest. To Mike’s face, though, Andy just says that he doesn’t know who Mike is “as a designer”. Whatever. The girls say they made April a sign, but it looks like the “Welcome Designers!” sign, and someone wrote “April!”, shoved in between words. There are a lot of stupid “grrl power” comments.

I think Heidi is wearing shiny tapered harem pants. Ew. Heidi claims they are supposed to “kick back and relax” for brunch with Tim and a “special guest”. Field trip to the marina!

Oh, it’s just Kors. He says today’s challenge is resort wear. I never get resort wear. I mean, I don’t get much of fashion in general, but when I look at people’s resort collections, it starts out looking like what people would wear on vacation to a resort, which is what I thought it was supposed to be, but then there’s always like, three ballgowns, which makes no sense. Anyway, Kors says it has to be cool and interesting and showcase “who you are” and so forth. Mike C. is like, um, from Palm Springs, I got this. Kors reminds them that resort wear actually means anything, any clothing. Mondo says when he goes on vacation, he stays home. He gets up late and walks around the apartment in underwear and a T-shirt. Love it! That is also my idea of resort wear. Kors sends them out on a boat to have brunch and sketch and wear the free Michael Kors sunglasses he’s giving all of them.

Gretchen says this will be challenging because Kors has high standards. As if he hasn’t been judging them this whole time. Mike D. doesn’t want to sketch. It’s too cool on the yacht. Casanova worries. Andy is making a luxury bathing suit and a cover up. April has never done resort wear, except for the diaper hot pants. Those were fine except for the fact that they were white. Tim, of course, has been on the yacht in his suit. Hee. While shopping, Mike D. says he’s a dark designer, and he has to stay true to himself. Tim agrees. I include it because it sounds like foreshadowing.

Uh oh. Tim has a “gather ‘round”. He has the velvet bag. Everyone knows this is not a good thing. Teams of two! Everyone has to execute each others’ designs! Tim says that good designers don’t do their own work, they send it out to other people to construct. Heh. Valerie gets paired with Andy and they seemed relieved. I mean, I think they’re still nervous, but that’s not a bad pairing. Mike C. gets paired with Mondo. Pretty much everyone is praying that they aren’t paired with Mike C. Even Mondo, and I didn’t think he hated Mike that much. April and Christopher (so thrilled), Casanova and Gretchen (AHHAHAAHA!), Ivy and Mike D. GIRL if you screw up Mike D. I will be PISSED. Tim says very carefully “the DESIGNER is responsible for how the sample maker executes the work”. So, if you are Ivy, and Mike D. ruins your look, the blame falls on Ivy. That…may suck.

Ivy is already changing her look. Chris and April are going like gangbusters. Mondo says flat out, Mike C., your construction is awful and you have immunity so I am not excited about this. Oo. Mike wants to prove he can do good work. But Mondo has a point, you have a pair challenge and one person has immunity. Andy has a swimsuit, and he’s worried because Valerie doesn’t do swimwear much. Ivy is still freaking out and Mike D. tells her to calm down. Hee. Mondo makes notes but has no sketch. He seems to throw something at Mike, but I think he was just throwing it. Mondo is like “I can’t believe you don’t have a ruler” but he has no sketch. Gretchen sketches a million sketches, all huge, because Casanova doesn’t understand English. He says he can see just fine and that she must think he’s stupid. Ivy says “nothing personal against Michael D. but it’s a challenge”. He feels he’s inherited her neuroses. Gretchen is telling Casanova his clothes are too old. Mondo hates Mike C.’s fabric, but he says he’s not afraid to focus on working with him to get his own garment done. He’s getting melodramatic, but I can see his thought process. If he screws up Mike C.’s garment, it’s supposed to be blamed on Mike C., who has immunity. Mike says someone thought he could sew, because he’s here. Mondo gives him some praise, and says he’s a good guy. He also apologizes to Mike for being a bitch. He promises he has faith in him. Aww, yay Mondo.

Tim time! Not really. Kors is here to do critiques. Sigh. He says it’s very important that they are able to explain what they want to someone else, because it’s very unlikely they will be sewing every single sample for their whole career. Kors tells Casanova to stay youthful, and Gretchen gets the same advice. Mondo has a lot of look, and Mike C. has a wide pant and loose top. Mondo thinks he will be judged if he does a poor job executing the look he’s been given, except that’s not how I interpreted what Tim said. Kors wants April to keep her dress sheer, with granny panties. Oh, sorry, boy shorts. Obviously she’s going to do that. Chris also gets some good praise. Kors doesn’t understand Ivy’s fabric choices, and Tim is shaking his head. She’s dumbed down her design because she’s afraid of Mike D. screwing it up. He gets some generic “don’t make it ugly” advice. Andy has given Valerie a lot of work. Scary. Kors then flat out tells Valerie that no one likes her color combinations that she keeps picking.

The models come in for fitting. Mike D. knows he hasn’t made what Ivy wants. His voice sounds wavery. Valerie calls home and loses it. However I have no sympathy for “oh, if I don’t make Fashion Week I have wasted so much time” because she showed today.

Ivy is still freaking out because she doesn’t think Mike D. can finish. He doesn’t want to feel like “a complete doo-doo head”. Valerie is scrambling. Mondo was caught off guard by Mike C., and acknowledges he was a jerk. Tim tells them their sample maker owns the work, until 10 minutes before the runway. Valerie has changed her colors. Ivy is done, so she’s micromanaging Mike D. Calm down. The models get fake tans. As soon as Tim comes in to tell them they have 10 minutes, Ivy leaps up to sew her garment. Mike D. helps her out because he feels bad.

Heidi is wearing some weird-ass black lacy sparkly thing. I feel like she would ridicule that if someone presented it on the runway. Guest judge is Kristen Bell. Mike C.: very low-cut halter top and palazzo pants, with a brown leather belt. It is a jumpsuit. The fabric is a shiny gold-green. It feels very 70’s. Oo, side boob. Mondo: blue and green striped bikini, with boy shorts, and a cropped windbreaker jacket with a bright green leaf print. She also has a matching visor. It’s not super exciting but it’s cute. Mike D: long black gown, with a slashed top. It’s like he cut up the neckline, but kept the straps. It’s hard to describe. Ivy: long gray skirt and a one-shouldered top, in gray-green. It’s so boring. I could buy that in the mall. Chris: one shouldered top, draped in a print and walking shorts. The print is kind of a non-color gray. April: sheer dress with boy shorts. The top has straps around her neck, and straps around her upper arms so she can’t raise her arms. Maybe she can argue it’s lingerie. Casanova: off the shoulder beige top with like, macramé as a belt and tight sleeves. Then he’s got some wide-legged pants. The back has a big keyhole. Gretchen: beige jumpsuit with a loose top and wide palazzo legs. Under the beige is a dark red. It’s the same color palette as the team challenge. The pants are slit up the side, and the top is pretty low cut, to show off the red. Valerie: I think it’s a two piece bathing suit, with high-waisted shorts in a chevron pattern, and a black bikini top. Over the top of that is a beige “cover-up”. It’s cut like a long vest, that clasps over her boobs and then flares out over her hips. Her model looks fat. She looks like she has a huge chest and a thick waist and is trying to camouflage it. The back of the vest (which is not much longer than the shorts) has panels so it looks like pleats, but they move oddly when she walks. Andy: very long and flowing purple cover-up. The purple shades from lavender to dark at the hem. It unties to reveal a one piece bathing suit with a very deep V. Imagine if you took fabric from each shoulder, through her legs, and then put a belt on it. Like that. But it looks fantastic.

Andy, Casanova, Mondo, April, Ivy, and Mike D. are called out. Everyone else is safe. Heidi cuts the bullshit and tells Andy, April, and Mike that they have the high scores. This is so she can kick the other three out of the room. The models come in, along with the “sample makers” a.k.a., partners. April’s outfit looks like her and is well done. She looks sexy but not vulgar. Kristen says she’d wear it on the red carpet, which bothers me. Andy wanted something versatile. It looks expensive and is beautifully done, and works in many sizes. Mike D. praises Ivy’s sewing skills and talks about how he loves his garment. For some reason, Heidi wants to know how Ivy liked working with Mike. “It was a challenge because he doesn’t really know how garments go on and off and I had to help him with that.” Mike admits they don’t speak the same jargon so it probably was difficult for her. Kors is like, shut it, the end result is important, and the end result is great. Ivy is quick to agree with him. Everyone seems to love it.

Loser gong! Not really. Mondo likes to play with colors. Nina says it looks cheap and junior, and she doesn’t buy that he doesn’t know what resort wear is, that’s not a good enough excuse. Kors claims that all designers do a resort wear collection, which I doubt is totally true. Kristen wants something more adult. Mike C. praises him though, and Mondo says he’s proud of their working together. Ivy wanted movement, but she then says that when she found out she was working with Mike D. and his “limitations of skill” she edited down her look. She also blames the lack of pants on him, which is true since she did ask him how he felt about palazzo pants and he said “not good” (although she claims he can’t make pants at all). She admits she changed her designs several times because she worried he wouldn’t finish. He says he told her he “felt uncomfortable” but he does know how to make pants. Kors points out she had like 7 fabrics (“I had four”), so she bought so little of each fabric she couldn’t do much of anything with them. Ivy argues that with her original idea she could have. Don’t pants take more fabric than a skirt? Kors is like, whatever, there is no personality. Ivy keeps agreeing, and I wish she would just be quiet and listen. Nina wonders if she has the ideas to be a good designer. Mike C. is loving every minute, and Heidi calls him on it. He says that since he’s worked with her before, he knows where other Mike is coming from. Ivy complains he shouldn’t roll his eyes, like she’s never rolled her eyes or been the bitch of the show. Kristen informs Ivy that she should have played to Mike’s strengths, and she claims she did do that. Heidi reminds her that with all this explanation, she still threw Mike under the bus. Ivy says she’s here for the competition, and needs to defend herself, and that’s not throwing him under the bus. Now that Mike C. knows people are watching him he’s making faces. Stop that. The judges all agree that Ivy blamed her crappy outfit on Mike’s lack of sewing skills, and that is throwing him under the bus. Casanova says a bunch of stuff that doesn’t make a lot of sense…I think he’s saying he doesn’t mean to design for his grandmother. His look is not vacation-y but it is matronly. Nina worries there is no middle ground with him; either he is vulgar or matronly.

In the Scrap Bin, Ivy thinks she’s going home. Mike D. reveals he told Ivy to throw him under the bus, as she complains that she was just trying to tell them how it was going and it was misinterpreted. Mike is all choked up with how poorly he made that garment. But he didn’t force Ivy to keep dumbing it down. She did that before he even put needle to fabric. He thinks that her not trusting him screwed with his head.

Andy’s outfit was wearable and good-looking. Mike D. was interesting and clean and polished, plus he could explain what he wanted. April kept true to herself and made something wearable. Mondo had random colorful clothes that didn’t go together. Ivy had no design and was bland. And Nina is suspicious of how she blamed Mike. Casanova is confused and is certainly not modern or cool.

Mike D. is in. He is thrilled to not win, actually, because he’d feel guilty. Out of all the pairings, Mike/Ivy is the only one where one person was top and one was on the bottom. He says he didn’t throw her under the bus because that would be childish. April is the winner. It was good, but I think Andy should have won. Andy is in, of course. Mondo is in. Oooohhhhhhhhh I see where this is heading and I don’t like it. Ivy was responsible for her fabric and dumbing down her design. Casanova was inspired by his grandmother. Ivy is in. Heidi tells her she must wow them next time. I knew it. Now I’m sad. Casanova comes into the Scrap Bin and pretends to hang himself from the door with his scarf. He says that he’s disappointed but not sad. Montage of Casanova quotes. Hee. Tim is super upset too. He says he grabbed one ball of NY and NY grabbed one of his. Yeah.

Next time: Jackie O. Tim Gunn says “Jackie Kennedy would not have camel toe”. Hee.

1 comment:

MoHub said...

For what it's worth: Kristen Bell said she'd wear April's look on the red carpet if it had another layer added. So she's not quite as weird in her taste as one might think.

And I will miss Casanova.