Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Project Runway 2/6/08--"Raw Talent" summary

Previously on Project Runway: God, when was the last episode again? I feel like it was months and months ago. There was denim? I think? Yeah, there was a ton of denim and random dresses and train wrecks. Ricky won for some reason, not that I would be surprised at a first-to-worst this week. Victorya was out. She showed at Fashion Week this week and her collection was pretty cute. You can find it over here at Project Rungay, which is a fabulous blog that is much bitchier than me. They also have Elisa’s collection, which…is not like Victorya’s, is all I’ll say. (click for more)

Jillian complains that she doesn’t want Fashion Week to be all boys. I guess she and Sweet P are the only girls left. Well, but Christian and Ricky are still around. Over in the boys’ apartment, Christian is still bitching about Ricky. Ricky knows he hasn’t earned any more respect from winning but he’s decided not to care about that.

Heidi is wearing some shiny gold today, I tell you what. Model time, Ricky chooses, blah blah like Ricky would abandon his model. Heidi gleefully tells them they have to wait for Tim to tell them about their challenge tomorrow morning.

That night everyone all hangs out together and brainstorms. I was going to repeat the choices, but they are all challenges that have been done in the past and they’re all wrong, so what do we care?

Tim makes them go on a fieldtrip. I’m tired of field trips. Christian is wearing red leggings. He tells Tim it had better be fierce. Chris talks about drag queens and I am excited because that would be crazy and so so entertaining. The field trip actually is just downstairs to the room where the runway usually is. There is loud yelling, and the more you listen the more violent it sounds. Christian says it’s sexual, but if my partner yelled like that I would be worried. They open the door: and it’s a bunch of female wrestlers kicking each others’ asses. SO. AWESOME. Rami is confused. Chris when he describes it calls them “ladies” and you can hear the quotes. These are the Divas from the WWE. Tim gets into the ring, which is hilarious. None of these people know who these women are. I am loving this. One girl as she introduces herself basically tears her clothes off. They have to make a costume. Oh man. You can see how much everyone freaks out, except for Chris. Everyone has to get into the ring and pick one of the divas. Ricky picks Layla. Jillian, Michelle McCool. Chris takes the redhead Maria. Christian takes Kristal. Sweet P takes Candice (the stripper). Rami is last and gets Torrie. You know what else this means. No models this week. Why did they even bother to pick models before?

They have 30 minutes to design together, then they have 30 minutes and $100 to shop at Spandex House. Let me repeat. SPANDEX HOUSE. Haha! Chris references “hooker-tranny wear”. Hee. Rami doesn’t think this is very fashionable, and he actually admits this is not about him. Sweet P is terrified. Christian wants to make chaps. Why do I feel he is not ignorant of chaps?

Spandex House. Heeeeeeee. Chris is buying leopard. Lots of shiny. Hee, Spandex House. I can’t get over that.

They have 5 hours left tonight, and then all day tomorrow. Someone has left DVDs of each wrestler so the designers can see their clients in action. Rami’s picked a strong red-pink. He’s making shorts. And draping again. As I suspected, Christian is wearing the chaps he’s making. Sweet P asks him if he likes her two fabrics together, and Christian laughs in her face. She won’t let this cuckoo challenge take her out. Even though Christian called her fabric “tranny ice queen”. (Kmanpat: “I would be careful who I mocked while I was wearing women’s chaps, missy.”)

In the morning there is more working. Chris is cool with this challenge but he mutters that some people are not. Sweet P thinks she has the robe down, since her client always has a duster coat that she tears off. I guess that’s her thing. She wants to go for pin-up, I guess. Jillian has bright blue. Chris has lots of straps and leopard. He points out that they could have dressed male wrestlers and everyone would be way more interested. Sweet P and Christian arm wrestle and I thought I knew what would happen but then Christian won. I know! Weird.

Tim appears to let the divas in for a fitting. Chris’s diva jumps up and down and giggles, she‘s so excited. Sweet P gets “going to the WWE hospital“. They talk about rhinestones and stuff. Sweet P is horrified at the tacky, except that Tim told her to add stuff because it’s boring. He also tells Ricky to be concerned about the color. Christian…somehow…has a cropped jacket with puffy sleeves. He starts babbling about fierce but I am still annoyed by his STUPID PUFFY SLEEVES ALL THE DAMN TIME. How can you complain about people always doing the same thing when you have managed to make a jacket with puffy sleeves FOR A WRESTLER. And no one ever says anything about it. They get on Rami for doing the same thing all the time. And the judges don’t want to sleep with Christian. Ricky asks for a snap, and Christian snoots that he didn’t want to help but Ricky’s outfit sucks anyway so it doesn‘t matter if he helps. “It’s a bathing suit, but I’m not going to tell him that. That’s how people get weeded out.“ Lovely. Sweet P, Chris, and Christian discuss their diva personalities. Sweet P’s name is “Spread Eagle” and her move is “the thighs”. Chris will be Wonder Woman and he will smother his opponents with his large breasts. Hee. Also I have seen him dressed up like Wonder Woman and he does has some large breasts. Christian’s name is going to be “Ferocia Cotura” (sigh) and her signature move is to spray other girls in the eyes with hairspray. OK, the last part was kind of funny.

Tim comes back again, yay! He tells Ricky not to use a ton of gold, and Rami has a color that could get him eliminated (please, they won’t do anything to him). Jillian has boy shorts and a bra, but she gets a pass when Sweet P was told her boy shorts and bra were boring. Christian’s is “fierce”, blah. Sweet P has the same thing as Jillian, but I guess her fabric sucks more? I don’t know. There aren’t any straps, I suppose. Tim calls it “Green Acres”. She doesn’t get much helpful advice, and then they edit everything to make it look like everyone is watching Tim yell at her.

Christian offers to be perfectly honest (as if he usually isn’t) and he basically tells Sweet P that her outfit sucks ass. But she can’t do anything now, and if she doesn’t give the client what she wants, she’ll get in trouble anyway. But as past challenges have shown, you get in more trouble for doing what the client wants, if it sucks.

Chris speculates about what Nina could possibly say about pink rhinestones. Sweet P is worried about her client. Tim gives them 90 minutes. Everyone comes in and fawns over everything. Sweet P is going to scatter the rest of her rhinestones on the robe. Christian’s client tells him he is too much. I agree. Ricky has an orange bikini with gold trim, and then a gold dress? I don’t know. It’s a lot of fabric, so it would hide the orange bikini completely. Hair and makeup time. The world stops spinning as Christian says that Sweet P turned her outfit around.

Commercials. You know that Levi’s commercial where the guy is putting on his pants and the street below comes up through his apartment and there’s the hot girl using a public phone because apparently there are still people who use public phones? I just saw that commercial, except with a hot boy using the phone. I didn’t know they made a gay version of that commercial.

Heidi gets in on the sparkles with her dress, but she looks super flat-chested so I don’t know what‘s up with that. Guest judges are Richie Rich and Traver Rains from Heatherette. Awesome. Christian: lace leggings with chaps. The chaps have cut outs so you can see the lace. The top has more lace, and only one arm. Then over the top is the silly jacket which she’s just going to take off anyways, it’s not for fighting. Those chaps are cut out pretty high in the back. Jillian has electric blue with boy shorts and straps, and then thigh high silver leggings. Alrighty then. Ricky’s gold dress was to be torn off, I guess. Which is good because it’s not exciting at all. It’s basically a really cute orange swimsuit, with gold buckles, and fishnets. It would have been great for the swimsuit challenge that first season. Chris has leopard and very dark green sparkles. The top has a ton of straps and is in the leopard print, and then the boy shorts are in sparkles. There’s also a cropped leopard hoodie that he lined with the sparkles. He wishes he could wear it. Sweet P, it’s sliver and blah, but the robe isn’t exciting either. It’s just a bra and boy shorts, and a long duster robe with feathers on the bottom like you’d buy at Victoria’s Secret. Rami has made a horrid skirt, and there’s weird boobs, and wraparound straps. God. The top has ruffles or something, that make her boobs look huge. The skirt tears off and there are sparkly bottoms that look so odd with the giant boobs.

Jillian’s client says she likes the outfit. Kors has to stop and say he feels like the Pope at a sex club. That’s probably more female skin than he’s ever seen. He likes Jillian’s outfit, but of course he‘s like, this would improve the entertainment value, I guess, I wouldn‘t know. Yes, Kors, we all know you‘re a big queen. Travers secretly likes the booty shorts. Kors reads some description about Rami’s model and something about gingham? Huh? I think he decided that Torrie was an “all-American girl” and so Rami should have made some slutty country dress or something. He wants more Americana. Nina hates the color. Christian babbles about stuff. Richie is reminded of Prince. Heidi pretends she could fight these women. Right. Sweet P was going for retro glamour. They wish she had made more of a robe. Like, one that covered her more. Kors then tells her that she should have gone for the drama. Sigh. Kors knows that Chris did not have trouble with this challenge. Her outfit looks expensive. Chris is glowing. Ricky…sigh. Nina likes it as a bathing suit. They don’t’ like the gold thing, it‘s not flattering.

Everyone loves Christian, he made her sexy but not vulgar, etc. They loved Chris’s, it looked expensive. Nina’s favorite was Jillian, it fit her model‘s personality. Ricky didn’t even answer the challenge. She stuck out in the lineup. Rami’s wasn’t strong enough, her boobs looked huge. Sweet P’s client wanted all out crap and wickety whack trim, and they think Sweet P should have gone for it.

Jillian is in. Chris wins. Yay! Maria is going to wear his outfit in the ring. He giggles that he won the tackiest challenge. Christian is in. Rami is in. shocking. Ricky messed up the challenge. Sweet P didn’t get her model’s image. Sweet P is in. What did I tell you? First to worst. Ricky starts talking about stuff and I’m not listening because I’m looking for tears and I don’t see that many. It’s not the end of him, blah blah blah, not crying. Bye, Ricky, and bye Ricky’s hats.

Next week: one last field trip. Sigh. They’re very excited. Sweet P freaks out again, Christian says something about Jillian and she tells him to shush and then he’s like, don’t get bitchy. SHUT UP YOU ARE MAKING PUFFY SLEEVES AGAIN I SAW THEM!! God.

I know this was kind of short, but it’s been a long week. I promise for the finale I’ll have really good descriptions of everything, plus the decoy collection, or collections, or whatever the hell they’re doing this year.

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