Friday, November 11, 2016

Project Runway 11/10/16--"Life Is Full of Surprises" summary

Previously on “Project Runway”: we pretended “pop up” meant “have some models stand in a store window for a couple hours”. Everyone got assigned a team and a “color palette” from the hair people. Laurence, Roberi, and Rik were Team Zero Drama and won, Roberi being the winner for a weird-ass skirt but whatever. Erin, Dexter, and Cornelius, Team Super Drama, were the losers. Erin and Dexter ganged up on Cornelius, not like Cornelius is a genius or whatever, but they ganged up on him. Later he and Dexter had a stupid argument, where everyone pretended to regret all the shit they said about each other. In the end, even though the judges knew Cornelius wasn't as bad as his team said, Cornelius was eliminated anyway. But that was just so Tim could Save him. I think the Save is dumb, but it was kind of worth it for how uncomfortable Erin and Dexter looked afterwards. Also I think the judges either knew Tim was doing it, or the producers told him to, and that's why they got rid of Cornelius instead of Dexter. (click for more)

Cornelius is excited about his second chance. He's not speaking to Dexter or Erin, obviously. I wouldn't either. Dexter claims he's OK with people being upset but there's a line? OK but you could have guessed Cornelius would be upset about your saying he should go home. Dexter clearly can dish it out but cannot take it. Erin is all “no one deserved to go home on this challenge but I had to say to keep Dexter because he and I aesthetically get along better”. Whatever, GRETCHEN.

We all meet in the workroom (Dexter bitches some more) and Tim comes in with someone from AARP. Are you fucking serious. Your sponsor is AARP. Anyway, there's some dumb stuff about “a new chapter” so Mah-Jing knows it's makeovers. Also it's loved ones. Still going to be giving the win to whoever gets the biggest most dramatic makeover and the loss to whoever does whatever the client wants. OK so many tearful reunions and so forth. Lots of moms but some sisters and best friends. I'm a total bitch but I'm not going to rag on family reunions, everyone seems genuine. Anyway, clearly it's the makeover challenge. The winner will get $25,000, and your family member gets the same amount. I still think this is a dumb sponsor but that's a good chunk of change. As Mah-Jing points out, that's nearly half of the grand prize of the whole show. Tim gives them two days so twist alert in effect. It may be that they're letting them have time to hang out, but they never give them two days.

I think they sent everyone out to breakfast. Mah-Jing's mom does underground hip-hop. She's starting a record label. Your mom's cool, Mah-Jing. She wants origami. Laurence's daughter is gorgeous, of course. I think she's opening a store. Rik's mom is going back to school. He promises her if he wins, he'll give the money to her to pay her back for his student loans and stuff. Aww. Dexter's friend is launching an “ecommerce” app. Sigh. Cornelius says his mom is traveling, as is Nathalia's mom. Erin is making another damn coat. She says her mom is Mormon, but not intense Mormon. Also Erin is wearing a shirt that says “Dexter” on it, which is pretty obnoxious. Jenni's mom lists a bunch of things she's going to do, but she's not really “starting a new chapter” like everyone else seems to be. You know? There are several upcoming events but no big life-changing things. So Jenni has no idea what to do. Tim says at least she knows her mom won't throw her under the bus.

Six hours left today. Someone makes fun of Cornelius for relying on his Save, but he laughs. Roberi calls him “The Resuscitated”, heh. Nathalia explains the joke (“because like, Jesus was resuscitated”) and ruins it. Erin is making a very embellished dress and a coat. Because of course. Nathalia's mom is going to Paris so the outfit has to be chic. Jenni makes a bunch of stuff for options.

Day two. Rik seems to be doing a lot of fiddly cutting out diamonds and whatnot. He jokes about putting his mom to work. Model fitting. Mah-Jing is making some pants that maybe aren't the coolest? He may be getting a loser edit.

Tim Time! So he can talk to the family members too. Tim tells Cornelius he did a fantastic job last week and he is still mad at the judges. Don't oversell it, Tim. Anyway, he seems to be doing fine. Mah-Jing has a very complicated jacket but it should be awesome if he pulls it off. Jenni has weird things happening. Her mom suddenly has opinions. Again, Laurence's daughter is super tall and thin and model-like so, advantage. Roberi might be over-designing. Nathalia has some great leather but her jacket has to be perfect. Erin's mom has a new job, but she has to wear lab coats at work so the outfit is for going out. Tim hates Erin's lace for the dress and it's floral lace and pastel blue. Tim says it's too junior but I think it's too old lady. Then he puts the coat back on and says “Erin? How many times have we seen this coat?” It's true. Dexter made a sweater dress with some weird cording? Like a cable knit but in a weird design with a small triangle over her navel and then two pieces along her hips? OK to be fair to Dexter it's interesting. Rik's mom hasn't worn a dress in a long time.

Erin loves her coat so she is ignoring Tim. Jenni is also not changing anything, just making sure the fit is perfect. Rik sews a heart on the dress with some thick white stitching in a design. Erin interviews that her mom was a designer but had kids and couldn't do anything and now Erin is living for her or whatever. Nathalia is behind. More than usual. Mah-Jing sings at Cornelius? I don't know. He loves the origami thing he made though. Jenni talks about maybe she needs a backup plan and Dexter tells her she's doing that thing they all do. She claims she can't figure out if the pants will fit, because of the dress form, but people have adjustable dress forms so why isn't she using one of those?

Runway Day. Nathalia is starting to freak out. Jenni puts the pants on her mom and they're terrible. But she is like “oh it's fine”. Non-models can't wear high waisted pants, Jenni. Cornelius's mom tells him to quit complaining and do what he needs to. Not hot makeup guy Scott. OK no one is getting actual makeovers, no hair and makeup changes, just clothes. So I will revise to Laurence winning because her daughter is the most model-like, and maybe Jenni losing for doing what her mom wanted. Also for her terrible pants. Nathalia has ten minutes to hem her jacket. I think most people are happy. Nathalia is putting her mom in the outfit as everyone is leaving, and she has to leave it pinned.

Guest judges are Olivia Culpo, “fashion and beauty expert”, and Katia Beauchamp, CEO of Birchbox. Roberi: simple tank dress, with a fit-and-flare silhouette. The top and bottom have two different prints, black with random white lines on top, and dark blue sort of floral on the bottom. The prints maybe don't go together but the dress fits really well. Jenni: yellow pants, a white top and a gray jacket. The pants are tapered to the ankle, so her hips look weird and big. The jacket is cropped with a high neckline and some embellishments of black sequins on one hip. The jacket (or is it a sweater?) is cute but loose fit tapered leg pants are not flattering on anyone. Dexter: very short dress with giant sleeves. The whole thing is knit, with some cables making a design on the front, and studs over the crotch panel. It's so short, you guys. But it's very Fashion. Rik: black dress with a cropped jacket. The dress is knee-length and has thick white stitching making a wavy path around it, with the heart over her left breast. The jacket has elbow length sleeves and a black and white square pattern, I think it's a tweed, with red piping. It's actually a cute outfit I would totally wear. Erin: giant oversized coat like always, with giant patch pockets like always. This one is light gray. Under this is a baby blue dress with lace down both sides. The lace is actually floral with half-circles of colored flowers throughout. The lace covers the whole back of the dress. It's weird and old-fashioned. Honestly it looks like something you'd find in your mom's closet and dress up in all the time and later find out it was a bridesmaid dress from her sister's wedding not that I've ever done that.

Cornelius: skirt and jacket in a beige with a nautical rope pattern on it, and thick orange stripes for accents. Under the jacket is a plain black shell with a boatneck. The skirt is high-waisted but it first really well and it looks pretty good. Laurence: fitted black skirt and a jacket that I think is black leather. The jacket has one hook and eye closure at her waist, and there's a red shell under this. It's not actually that exciting and the skirt and jacket look too tight. Mah-Jing: black pants, or maybe dark denim, and a big jacket with leather on top and maybe some other fabric from the waist down? I can't tell on my TV and it's all in black. The coat looks oversized, but it cinches at the waist and she has such attitude she looks badass. There are a lot of folds but it's hard to see. It's also androgynous which is cool. Nathalia: big wide legged pants in burgundy, that are maybe too long? The jacket is white and dark brown leather, and is pretty oversized. And it doesn't look oversized on purpose. It's brown leather on the shoulders and cuffs, and white everywhere else. The pants don't look right either, I think because they're high-waisted and that doesn't look flattering.

Laurence, Dexter, and Cornelius are safe. Yeah, sounds about right. I was wrong about Laurence and that's fine. Roberi's friend is a graphic designer. It fits beautifully and the thin pink lines on the bodice are things he added to bring in the bottom print. That's cool actually. Nina says he carefully thought of everything. Erin says something about caterpillars and cocoons. Nina doesn't like the confusion about the simple coat and the busy lace dress. The lace actually is longer than the blue dress. Heidi accuses her of making something she herself wanted. Nothing goes together, but at least Erin's mom says she likes it. Rik talks about his mom's outfit and they all love the heart. It fits very well, and Zac says a tweed jacket is just a symbol of chicness. He did really well.

Jenni somehow thinks her mom would wear that outfit to work. To a school? No. It's bad and it looks sloppy. She does look like she's trying to be young. Mom says that she loves it and this is how she would dress. So since she likes it Zac has to take the tack of “You can't wear this to work to be the director of a preschool”. The pants are distracting and the T-shirt under the jacket/sweater/whatever is lazy. They do seem to agree that if the pants fit, it wouldn't suck so much. Mah-Jing's mom wanted to be a superhero. It's badass and it fits her attitude. She says this outfit fits what she feels on the inside. Mah-Jing is crying because he cries easily. Nathalia is sending her mom to Europe with this schmatta with the giant patch pockets for her passport and whatever. The coat is way too big, and Zac spied the pins. They take the coat off, and the shell is baggy too, and super wide-legged pants. She had two days and she still had pins. Not acceptable. She's drowning in the clothes. Nathalia cries so hard her mom has to hug her and Heidi asks if she's OK. She says it's just very emotional with her mom here and everything and then she apologizes for distracting them with it. That...was actually a really great way to respond.

Nathalia's mom's outfit hid her great figure. Jenni's sweater is very high at the neck but also cropped. Not appropriate for a woman at work. They like the blue Erin used but not the lace. Zac thinks the back of the jacket is too big. Mah-Jing's jacket is different fabrics and is really well made and high fashion. They love Rik's dress and detailing. Roberi I think fit this dress so perfectly. Better than they usually fit the professional models.

Rik is the winner! I think Mah-Jing should have won but fine. I liked Rik's outfit. Everyone cries. Mah-Jing and Roberi are in. Erin is in, because of course she is. Sigh. Nathalia is in. Jenni is out. Nathalia makes a big deal about crying and promising to do better and so forth. Jenni cries too. She does eventually laugh at something. She also does the usual thing to promise not to stop designing.

Once again no preview so FINE. I won't be tricked into watching your other shows, Lifetime.

1 comment:

Duabe said...

Thanks Toyouke for a very thoughtful and amusing recap. I did like Rik's outfit for his Mom and glad he's able to repay her some of the money for his education. Now it's her turn to go to school and hope she does really well.

Erin can go home now.

Roberi's outfit was really pretty and he worked so hard to make his friend a nice outfit. Can't say anything nice about Jenni's outfit, so I won't.

Don't care about Lifetime's new designer show - a rip-off and waste of energy.

Bring back the kids Lifetime - they were at least enthusiastic and imaginative.

Okay, I'm off my soap-box now.