Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Project Runway 11/14/07--"Sew Me What You Got" summary

Well, it’s about damn time. “Project Runway” is back after a very long time away. I have to admit that I’ve lost some interest because of the break. Hopefully it’ll be fine and there will be good drama and crazy fashion.
More after the jump.

Arrival time. Rami is first; he has a studio in LA and he’s made clothes for people like Jessica Alba. He meets Chris in the apartments (not Atlas this year). Chris dresses drag queens. Like, seriously. Anyone who needs a crazy over-the-top costume that no one in their right mind would ever wear, he’s the guy. He’s made an outfit out of lettuce. Christian is very fey and name drops people as he introduces himself. He says that he’s “kind of fierce”. Yeah. It helps if you don’t sound like a 15 year old girl when you say that. He tells everyone that he sleeps on the floor at home because he‘d rather pay for clothes, and his roommates look disturbed. Carmen used to model, and she looks like it, but her hair now is crazy. It’s tall and 80’s. Jillian is wearing what looks like a figure skating outfit. She works for Ralph Lauren but now she wants to make her own stuff. She says she’s not going home. Yeah. She and Carmen plot to take over the bathroom before anyone gets there. Just then Kit shows up and kind of giggles at everything. Kevin looks like Joey Fatone; he’s designed jeans but he’s branching out and mentions straight designers are more prevalent now, I guess to justify himself. Jack is very hot. Steve works in Chicago for the Museum of Science and Industry. He draws also and his video is very self-conscious although I did giggle when he showed the naked man he had been sketching and he lamented that he lost the guy‘s phone number. He says he just missed being cast last year. Simone comes in and then Elisa, who makes marionettes. And costumes to perform with the puppets. Marion is also cute. Ricky has a leather hat. Sweet P introduces herself. I‘m sorry, but her name makes me not want to talk to her. She started her business two years ago, and now she’s broke so she has to make some money. On one arm she has a tattoo of “Sweet P” and on the other she has “Mean P“. OK, that’s entertaining. They’re in the Gotham apartments this time, and they have notes to meet Heidi and Tim at Bryant Park.

Simone introduces herself and talks about her unique vision and whatever. Then she explains why Bryant Park is important for fashion, which, we know. The designers descend on a table with champagne and start drinking without waiting for anyone. Marion designs clothes out of his flower shop. Jack makes active wear? That’s what the graphic says. He wants to work for himself. Victorya has that ageless look many Asian women have. She is an overachiever. Oh my gosh, Asian overachiever! None of my relatives would ever do well in school and be nerds! Just kidding, my uncle was 4th in his class and his sisters call him “the stupid one”. Kit says that “Kit Pistol” is her alias. I am not sure I like her clothes but they do fit the name Kit Pistol. She says “Life is too short to have on a bad outfit.“ Hee. Ricky designs lingerie. His hat is like, black mesh. It is exactly what you would see on someone dressing up in black leather to go to a gay bar. He started in New York as a dancer but now fashion is his life and he’s in tears about it. Heidi and Tim bust in on the party and demand attention. For once, Heidi is not pregnant. She also announces that there will be 3 finalists this year, so none of that “you are all so awesome we decided you can all have collections“ nonsense. Tim welcomes everyone. Then he says they raise the bar every season, so they are the strongest group ever (just like last year was the strongest ever). Once Heidi establishes that they’ve been having fun, she tells them fun time is over. Tim says this time they won’t be making clothes out of random stuff (aw!), but they will be using tents. Across the grass there are those cheap ass collapsible tents. All the designers, and me, think they have to make clothes out of tent fabric, which might be plastic for all they know. But inside, where they can’t see, are dozens of samples. They even took the time to drape white fabric so when you look in the open door, all you see is white. So it’s not just the tent fabric. $50,000 worth of fabric from Mood for them to choose from. Sweet P has taken off her shoes. Now they make them run across the grass to fight for fabric, and I wanted so badly to see Tim lean backwards like Phil does on “Amazing Race” but he doesn’t. Ricky runs “like a Mexican running to the border”. Kit says she spied some plaid, but Kevin also is running for it. Kevin wins the race. Poor Chris is the very last. Sweet P is just pulling random crap that looks good. Chris says that the stuff he wanted was left behind anyways. Elisa is staining the silk chiffon with grass stains as Tim looks on in horror. No, really. She’s got the fabric on the grass and she’s grinding it into the turf with her knees. There is one lone fabric sample left behind: some fake fur.

Everyone unloads their stuff at Parsons. Tim comes in to remind them to use the outfit to show who they are as a designer. They have until 1am, and it’s about 11:55am right now. Tim says to make it work and everyone applauds. Victorya talks about the pressure to put yourself into one outfit. Ricky admits that he didn’t need all his fabric for his baby doll dress with lingerie overtones. Simone does vintage. Rami drapes to make a feminine but edgy dress. Elisa says she’s making a mythical gown. This involves folding the fabric like a fan, and then taking scissors to it in a random fashion. Also she is using words like “avant-garde”. When she’s done cutting it looks like the edge of the fabric got caught in a thorn bush, but it’s what she wants since she wants magic flowing out of the back of the dress. She sews using herself as the dress form and Chris kind of is freaked. Christian makes fun of her “rain goddess” strangeness. You have emo bangs and a vest. Shush. Jillian says it has to be elegant and sophisticated. Kit thinks the judges might be a little confused by her clothes. Steve is classic and pared down. Carmon wants to borrow pinking shears with a different shape and she is the first one to flirt with Jack. She says he looks like a superhero, and someone (a girl) asks if she’s see his abs (it could be ass, either way). He reminds them he’s in the room but you know he likes it. Plus, how many superheroes are naked? There are mostly-naked pics of him on the internet.

Tim comes to visit. Rami’s dress is gorgeous, but Christian thinks it’s been done. Christian’s top is cute, with plaid, and Tim tells him it’s not symmetric and he’s been meticulous with it everywhere else. Heh. He pretends he did that on purpose. Simone talks about color contrast, but she has a lot of finishing to do. She’s gotten a little lost but she thinks it’ll get done. A new development: no Macy’s wall. Now it’s Elisa begins to talk about body conscious and…oh God. There’s a train, but it’s like what Santino would do: tack a bunch of random crap onto the garment for impact. Bleh. She thinks she’s done, and she’s heard Tim’s argument, but she doesn’t want to compromise. Chris is all, uh, WTF? The edges aren’t done, the train is made of 6 different fabrics and none of them go together. And I can’t find the grass stains. Elisa declares she’s done and takes a nap. Lots of frantic working. Someone says “don’t go into fear box”. Finally the day is over and everyone can go home.

Next morning. Gratuitous shot of Jack in boxer briefs! Chris and Christian giggle about how other people aren’t done. Christian’s hair doesn’t look that bad half done and not all spiked and whatever. Elisa does yoga and talks about her finishing. I bet this means she gets done. Upon further inspection, Carmen has cornrows on the sides of her head, and then the rest up like a Mohawk. But in her interview she has two short pigtails on top of her head. Tim gives them their two hours to fit models and all that stuff. The wall does have fabulous shoes on it. Chris is very pleased with his model, who looks kind of like Camille. Elisa is “hand measuring” her model. A lot of models are praising the clothes to the designers. Chatty this season. Simone has to stitch her model into the dress. Carmen gasps at something, but we’re not shown what. Elisa has her model do a test walk, and discovers that her model can’t walk in the dress because of the stupid train. She says she had an impulse to chop it all off but she didn’t. Christian is catty about how other people suck. I have the feeling I might need a macro for that.

Aa! Heidi’s been tanning with Kors! She’s all orange! The winner this season can sell their line on Nice. Kors and Nina are here, and the guest judge is Monique Lhuillier. Notice that Heidi says the highest score will win but not that the lowest score will be out. Elisa’s dress is great from the top about to her knee. It’s turquoise and has flutter sleeves and it’s fitted. Once you get to the knee there’s that ridiculous train in the back. The poor model has to hold the train up so she can walk and she still trips on it anyways. Chris has gorgeous eggplant satin and the train attached to a bracelet. The bodice is a dark olive green and a print, and it twists into a halter top. Kevin has a short skirt with black pinstripes, a red stripe along the hem, and then this weird silver tin foil bodice. Sweet P has made a poofy dress. It‘s not a bubble skirt, but it flares out from an empire waist and then the hem is about the same width as a pencil skirt, so it emphasizes the hips. It‘s also in an odd khaki eyelet fabric with red underneath. Simone’s bodice is not fitted well and it’s very simple. It looks like there’s also a jacket that’s just a rectangle with armholes and a tie. Jillian’s dress is an orange halter and bobble skirt. Color is great; it looks exactly like something she would wear. Christian’s jacket has puffy 80s sleeves and the skirt is sort of a bubble hem but it‘s longer in front and flatter. Victorya has a simple black dress, very loose, with a big silver flower. It’s got regular straps but then some horizontal straps, like her bra straps slipped down. Rami’s gray gown is draped goddess style and it’s beautiful. Ricky presents a very simple dress with shiny stripes. I can see someone like Paris wearing it. Jack has a black and white print, a halter top, with a turquoise sash. It‘s really cute. Marion has a sheer top that looks like lingerie, and an asymmetrical hem in a much heavier fabric that looks almost like vinyl tablecloth material. Steven has a black suit but it’s cut very well. In the back of the jacket it looks like there are ruffles lined with another fabric. Carmen has black wide-legged pants and a shiny gold jacket, with a melon ruffled blouse. The blouse looks like it‘s got a tie or a huge flower thing up at the neckline. Kit has a black print with a red bodice. One shoulder of the bodice has a ruffle sleeve on it, but the other side is cut underneath the model’s breast. So the overall effect is that the model’s boob is hanging out. Perhaps that is what Kit Pistol stands for.

Heidi has Chris, Kevin, Sweet P, Jillian, Jack, Marion, Steve, Carmen, and Kit step forward. They’re all safe. Aww, Jack didn’t win? Or Jillian? The rest of them get grilled. Christian says he was going off a sculptural European piece. Monique likes the volume, Kors says it’s polished, Nina says the fabric is boring but the siholutte is great. Simone wants to express a “modern romantic” feeling. Without the jacket you can see the poor construction, and now that the model‘s not moving with the jacket on it looks terrible. She ran out of time. Kors thinks that with the jacket she looks like she dressed in the dark. Rami gets lots of praise. Kors has to add in that the flower on her shoulder is “a little mother of the bride”. Ricky explains that he does lingerie, and Nina thinks it’s boring. So does everyone else (including Heidi--did she used to talk that much?). Victorya gets some praise for how sweet it is. Victorya herself is wearing a sack. No, I am serious, it’s a sack. Kors makes fun of the straps, like she can’t lift her arms, but then he says some women will bleed for fashion. Huh? I can see bleeding for shoes, since shoes that don’t fit can actually make you bleed. How will a dress make you bleed? He says nothing about the flower. So, big shiny silver flower = OK, small flower in the same fabric as the dress = mother of the bride. Elisa babbles about her dress being alive, water, air, a haiku of a cut and Kors laughs at her. There are sound effects. Not from the editors, but from Elisa herself. Nina points out that the train drags the fabric down. The top of the dress is wonderful but the train is stupid and she should have stopped. She admits she had the impulse to cut it off. Yeah, should have done that.

Victorya’s dress had some flirtiness and charm. Christian had intricate detail, it was well made, even the back was great. Rami knows what he’s doing, and they want to see more. Simone’s dress, on the other hand, was very boring and poorly made. Elisa just did some crazy stuff. Heidi says her model looked like she was pooing fabric. Hee! Backstage Elisa is tearing up her train. Ricky’s dress is OK but very simple and it doesn’t wow them very much. Heidi and Kors agree it’s not good enough.

Victorya is in. Now for the winner: Rami. He gets immunity for the next round. Christian is in. Ricky is in. Simone and Elisa are left. Simone’s dress was too boring and it was sewn poorly. Elisa was creative but her dress needed serious editing. Simone is out. Oh good, at least one more episode of Elisa. She sounds kind of like Daniel Franco when she talks. Simone thinks she said what she wanted to say, and she didn’t think she’d be the first to go. She thought she’d be in the final 3, but she seems confident that she can make it to Fashion Week on her own.

This season: everyone laughs and stuff, there’s a special guest that people cheer for, bitchery, Jack has something to share (I know what it is and it sucks). Some judges slamming people but no really awesome sound bites. That makes me sad.

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