Monday, May 3, 2010

TAR16, Recap Leg 11, 5/2/10

Welcome to Leg 11! Last time, on Smoking Will Stunt Your Growth, teams flew from Singapore to Shanghai. Jet was a noodle master, and Jordan’s got tangled. We saw the first ever double roadblock leg. And it was Louie and Michael who were not eliminated in the final non-elimination leg, and now face a Speed Bump soon. Who will be eliminated. . . next? (click for more)

Arrival at the pit stop last episode:
1st – Jet/Cord, The Cowboy Brothers
2nd – Brent/Caite, Team Like The Iraq Such As
3rd – Dan/Jordan, Team I Love You Bro!
4th – Louie/Michael, Team Sherlock

Shanghai Science and Technology Museum, Shanghai, China

8:02 AM Jet/Cord (1st)
Clue: Make your way to the Garden Bridge. You have $22 for this leg of the race.

What racers don’t know is that the Chinese don’t know the bridge as Garden Bridge, but as Wàibáidù Qiào. This makes things fun for the racers.

Cord talks about how he had his skull crushed by a hoof in 2004. Ouch. Good thing hot cowboy is still alive to be on my television screen.

8:36 AM Brent/Caite (2nd) – Caite can’t understand why people still make fun of her three years after she was on the Miss Teen USA pageant for her answer in the interview portion. (Toyouke: “Making the final 3 will not make people forget you are Miss The Iraq, Like Such As.”) Well, I know that CBS didn’t show it again, but let me load this up . . .ok, yup, she’s still an idiot. Youtube FTW!
8:53 AM Dan/Jordan (3rd) – Dan was very set on helping his brother fulfill his dream. And now he wants to win. Bad. Oh, this could get fun.
11:00 AM Louie/Michael (4th) – They never quit, apparently.

Teams find taxis and arrive at the Garden Bridge in the following order:

1- Brent/Caite – who found a local who looked it up on her cell phone internet.
2- Jet/Cord – who had their taxi driver call the dispatch to find the information
3- Louie/Michael – who help by calling a translation service. (Toyouke: “There's a translation service in Shanghai? Awesome!”)
4- Dan/Jordan – who decide that they are going to wait for the team behind them that is leaving TWO AND A HALF HOURS after them and get help that way. Cute but stupid boys. Is there no end? (Toyouke: “Ouch. That is a very long time to wander around. I don't know that your strategy of "let's wait for the last place team and beat them later" is such a good idea.”)

Once at the bridge, teams are instructed to find Longhua Temple, but they must not take a taxi in order to get there. (Toyouke: “Excellent, public transportation.”) Teams arrive at the temple in the following order:

1- Brent/Caite – who found the place thanks to Caite’s map reading. (Toyouke: “No one said you couldn't read a map. They said you were an idiot.”)
2- Jet/Cord – (Toyouke: “Did they just walk by Brent? Hee!”)
3- Louie/Michael
4- Dan/Jordan
– (Toyouke: “Jordan and Dan haven't had the best strategy today. They needed to get their driver to listen to the person on the phone. Or something.”)

When they arrive, Louie and Michael find the Speed Bump.


A speed bump is a task that must be performed by the last place team on a non-elimination leg. Once they complete this task, they may return to the place where the speed bump occurred and continue the leg. In this, the third of three speed bumps, teams must find the large incense burner at the Longhua Temple complex. Team members must then toss one coin each into the top window of the burner in order to be able to return to the race.

Really? No going away? No physical task? Throw a COIN? *Sigh*

Teams complete the Speed Bump in the following order:

1- Louie/Michael

They throw their coins quickly and return to the task at hand: the tenth roadblock.

Who thinks they can sum up Buddha?

In this roadblock, one team member must count golden statues. Once they come up with the correct sum (523), teams can check with the monk to get their next clue. If they are wrong, they must wait ten minutes before trying again.

The following team members complete the Roadblock.

1- Caite – who takes it to prove she’s smart. And then takes four tries. (Toyouke: “OK, counting is not that strenuous of an activity. I mean, people fail at it, but counting correctly will not make up for harping on one comment one person made a month ago. Especially when you count wrong.”)
2- Jet
3- Dan
4- Louie
– who takes two tries.

After much Buddha counting, teams complete the Roadblock in the following order:

1- Jet/Cord
2- Brent/Caite
3- Dan/Jordan
4- Louie/Michael

Teams are then instructed to choose a motorcycle from a select group and take a ride to Yuyuan Gardens and search for the next clue. Teams arrive at the clue box in the following order:

1- Jet/Cord
2- Brent/Caite
3- Dan/Jordan
– Jordan: “I got to wear these cool goggles and gloves, and I got to hold this strange Chinese man. Oh, yeah, I kinda liked that.” Oh yes, honey, you and me both.
4- Louie/Michael

Teams now get the Detour Clue.

Pork Chops OR Pork Dumplings
*Pork Chops: Teams must travel to Art Stone and find two chops (name stamps) in the store. Each shop will have one of the team members names on it and the picture of a pig. Once both are found, the owner gives them their next clue.
*Pork Dumplings: Teams must travel to a restaurant and pick up ten orders of dumplings, deliver them somewhere, and return to get their next clue. Not that it matters, because no one delivers dumplings.

(Toyouke: “Both of these Detours sound long and annoying and luck-based.”)

1-Jet/Cord choose Pork Chops – (Toyouke: “Aww...I wanted Jet to hide Brent's chop.”)
2-Brent/Caite choose Pork Chops – Brent really has to pee, and Caite won’t let him. Whatever. Caite: “These things are big like you.” Brent: “I know, I’m huge like everything else.”
3-Dan/Jordan choose Pork Chops
4-Louie/Michael choose Pork Chops
– Louie: “I’m leaving no stone unturned.” *rimshot*

Teams complete the detour in the following order:

1- Brent/Caite
2- Jet/Cord
– (Auburnium0513: “Did he just say "muy rapido" in Shanghai?”)
3- Dan/Jordan – (Toyouke: “Dan's getting pretty competitive for someone who is only on the race to make their partner's dream come true.”)
4- Louie/Michael

Teams are now instructed to travel to the Huangpu River and find the Riverside Promenade. This is the PIT STOP of the eleventh leg of this racearoundtheworld. The last team to check in WILL be eliminated.

1- Brent/Caite – and they win a luxury trip to Coastal Spain to see Seville and Cadiz. Not that they really know where that is. (Toyouke: “You have proved nothing except that you are a whiny beauty queen who can't tolerate other people joking about her but doesn't see the irony of making the same comments yourself. I hope you fail in the last leg. “) Oh, and they are checked in by Bao Xishua, the world’s tallest man. (Toyouke: “WTF is with this Guiness Book of World Records nonsense??”)
2- Jet/Cord
3- Dan/Jordan
4- Louie/Michael

And Louie and Michael are eliminated. But they are still good friends and are happy to have raced with each other.

1st – Brent/Caite
2nd – Jet/Cord
3rd – Dan/Jordan

Next week: Final Leg! San Francisco! Scaling Coit Tower! Who will win? (Toyouke: “Caite has not changed my mind about her. Virtual Reality? Really? Weak. Although, I do enjoy Cord peeking around the corner to make fun of Jordan. It's just pwning n00bs on PS3.”) Until next time!

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