The Quest episode 10: "One True Hero"

Previously on “The Quest”: Twelve people were brought from our world to Everealm to defeat Verlox the Darkness. One by one they were banished, in search of the One True Hero. The last four paladins left were captured by the Rana, along with Ansgar, Crio, and the Queen. Everyone had to convince the Rana chief why they were worthy, and Lina jumped the gun in her eagerness to convince them. They had to make her stop so they could take out an hourglass to time her. Later the paladins had to escape from cages and free everyone, and Andrew finished first. Lina, Patrick, and Shondo had to cross a rickety bridge on a bog, carrying eggs, to appease a banshee. Shondo was first there. When it came down to the vote, it ended up being a tie, so Andrew was the deciding vote since he won the badge that day. He kept his vote for Lina, and Patrick was banished. Was it a strategic move? Or was it because Lina got further than Patrick in the Fates’ challenge? Or because of her argument about being the One True Hero? Because that really impressed me. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 9: "Escape from Rana Village"

Previously on “The Quest”: Verlox took over Sanctum, and everyone had to flee into the woods. They found a dragon, and then a burned-out village. Everyone had to trap the dragon in its lair, because dragons sleep during the day, down in hatches with grates and locks. Andrew and Shondo were the first to finish (Andrew first), and then they helped everyone else because they have to trap the dragon. The Fates’ challenge was to lift dragon eggs out of a pit, without touching them. Patrick was first, but Lina was right behind him. Patrick tried to tell Andrew and Shondo that Bonnie was further along than Lina, but it didn’t look like they believed him. Bonnie was banished, and got a whole montage of scenes and everyone talking about how much they’ll miss her. Even the Queen said so! I will also miss Bonnie but I’m also kind of surprised by how far she got, for someone who hated running. And that no one decided to vote for her to have someone “easy” to beat in the finale. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 8: "The Dragon's Lair"

Previously on “The Quest”: everyone had to flee the castle as Verlox showed up to take over the place. The vizier gave the queen an amulet for “protection” and then promptly vanished for the rest of the episode. The paladins had to split into two teams to create a message out of signal flags, and the girls failed partially because two of them don’t know how many sides a pentagon has. The boys finished first, with Patrick taking the badge. The Fates’ challenge involved sitting in a tree and remembering details about an enemy patrol. Bonnie remembered the most, and then everyone voted for Lina, which is rude because Leticia was the one person who voted for Christian so no one would have to be abandoned. That bugs. Back at the camp everyone is interrupted by noises, and then they run up to a ridge to be super obvious, backlit targets and stare at something we haven’t seen yet. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 7: "Verlox Attacks"

Previously on “The Quest”: the traitor ended up being someone Ansgar knew, who had fought by his side and then got kicked out of the castle for stealing. He’s planted “fire orbs” around the castle, which have to be located by watching footage from a “falcon”. Lina is the first one to find an orb, followed by Bonnie, Shondo, and Patrick. The remaining three must line up swords with circles on them to allow a beam of light to hit a map, telling them where Verlox is coming from. Andrew overcomes his ADD and wins the Fates’ challenge. Adria loses the narrow vote and is banished. While drinking with Ansgar, the paladins are interrupted by Verlox himself. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 6: "A Traitor in Sanctum"

Previously on “The Quest”: everyone fails at making that giant crossbow weapon while Ansgar fights an ogre single handed and looks hot. Christian decided to scheme and throw the challenge (which was to barricade and then break down doors). Asshat. So of course his team lost, because he picked a lame team, but then he lost the Fates’ challenge (run through the woods wearing a cage). No one wanted to support him after he was a jerk. Woo! Weirdly I am fully behind everyone on this show playing with “honor” and “integrity” and all the things I hate on Survivor. Patrick gave himself a black eye and then sprinted out to “save” Bonnie when she fell even though she ended up being fine. That’s what I want to see. Lina won the challenge, by the way, because Shondo said she’s the smallest and she kept up so she deserves to win. After some chores (and another of Bonnie’s songs) everyone freaks out because there’s a “spy orb” flying around. Spying on them, I guess. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 5: "Under Siege"

Previously on “The Quest”: a drill proves to Ansgar that the paladins are not battle-ready, so he makes them pick teams and then battle to the death in the Battle Dome. Well not really to the death. Leticia wins, because she let the boys knock each other out. Jasmine, Adria, and Lina were sent to the Fates to smash skulls, which Adria won. For some reason everyone thought Lina was more worthy of staying, so Jasmine was banished. Then there was an ogre. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 4: "Battle Dome"

Previously on “The Quest”: the Queen was poisoned, so the paladins were sent into the woods to open some doors and get ingredients for the antidote. Andrew was the fastest, and was allowed to mix the ingredients and give the antidote to the queen. The vizier continued to be evil. Bonnie, Jim, and Christian were the worst again. Christian is terrible. The Fates’ challenge required grinding rocks and balancing a scale, and Bonnie was the fastest. Despite telling Christian last time that no one was going to save him again, everyone did which is dumb. So Jim was eliminated. The cliffhanger is that the castle is under attack and the paladins have to suit up. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 3: "Save the Queen"

Previously on “The Quest”: the remaining paladins were introduced to Queen Ralia XXIII. They were also told Verlox is within a few days of the castle. When everyone was learning to ride, Leticia lost her piece of the Sunspear. In case you were wondering, she just got yelled at a little bit instead of being disqualified. The main challenge was to shoot arrows and spears and joust on horseback. Shondo destroyed the challenge and earned “the Dub” as he says. I love Shondo. Andrew called the Queen “my lady” and everyone acted like it was a big thing. Jim, Ashley, and Christian were the bottom three, which is sad because Ashley is a horse trainer and Christian has been going on about how he does this kind of thing for a living. I mean, he goes to Ren Faires and does demonstrations. Jim won the Fates’ challenge (this very long thing involving horseshoes) and then Christian was saved by the vote, sending Ashley home. The other paladins told Christian this was his last chance. Later at dinner the Queen appeared and then was poisoned! Gasp! Can the paladins save her? Spoiler: yes. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 2: "Tournament for the Queen"

Last time on “The Quest”: twelve people were chosen to live in an RPG video game. Destined heroes? Check. Evil guy who wants to rule the world? Check. Magic women who brought you here from the “real” world? Check. Evil vizier? Check. Everyone is really into it, playing their characters and interacting with the actors and basically buying into this idea that one of them is the One True Hero. This is continued into the part where they’re nice to each other and play “honorably” for lack of a better word. Teams of three try to launch arrows over a wall and hit scarecrows. When the winning team is asked to choose one winner they quickly pick Bonnie and don’t argue about it. The losing team must complete a challenge put forth by the Fates, which basically is to shoot arrows at dummies and hope your dummy has the fewest arrows. Then there is a public vote, which was prefaced by a rational discussion of everyone’s strengths and the idea that maybe getting rid of threats like you would in “Survivor” is not how this show works. Maybe you should keep the strong people around to help you later. Katie was the first person sent home, or technically she went to “meet her fate”. Which means she walked through an archway and “melted” into smoke. (click for more)

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The Quest episode 1: "The Quest Begins"

“The Quest” is what happens when you admit that all of those challenges on your reality show are fake anyway, so you might as well make your entire reality show “fake” and have a story and actors. I’ve been watching this show on ABC for a few weeks. I started a little late, but then I thought “You know, I should at least say on the blog to watch it” but then I forgot. And then they started burning off two shows a week and it’s almost over. But you can watch all the episodes on Hulu or on ABC’s website. Mostly all of them; they take a week to be available (unless you have Hulu Plus). Clearly this is just me recapping something for fun instead of being timely, because if all I ever write about is “Project Runway” I will lose my damn mind. But I think this show is great and I hope the two-episodes-each-week is because of poor planning and not poor ratings. (click for more)

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