My monkey could do that

Tuesday, April 28, 2026

Top Chef 4/27/26--"Restaurant Wars" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: the Quickfire was to make a dish that fits into the existing Cracker Barrel menu. I think this is a great challenge, but not when you make everyone get into groups of three and then they have 45 minutes but only one person can cook at a time. Why do we need to only have 15 minutes? Also this is the day after the BBQ challenge where they stayed up all night. Anyways, the twins and Anthony won, mainly because Jonathan made steak smothered in bourbon pan gravy and it did seem exactly like something you could buy at Cracker Barrel. Then everyone had to take a Southern dessert to reinterpret, for the judges and 60 “superfans”, with three hours. Starting immediately, no going to the store, no time in the car to think about what you're doing. The superfans voted on the winner, which was Anthony, for making a twist on apple stack cake. Justin picked out ambrosia salad, which the excellent logic of “this way I don't have to bake a cake”, but then he didn't have enough cream and everything was too cold, so he was eliminated. Kristen called everyone back and said that Restaurant Wars starts right this second, with 36 hours until service. Oh also you must do takeout. Jenn (whose face was pulling and drooping and painful) was sent to the hospital, and they asked her to leave. But she can come back in a future season. Kristen pulled Justin from wherever he was to tell him the news and that he can return if he would like. Justin called Jenn, and then said he couldn't think about competing while she was in the hospital, which is totally fair. Then the episode ends. (click for more)

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Tuesday, April 21, 2026

Top Chef 4/20/26--"Desserts Fit For a Queen" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: at first they said there was no Quickfire, because it's BBQ time. Smoke a whole pig overnight, in two teams. Each chef took one part of the pig and they battled head-to-head for [product placement] money. There did end up being a Quickfire, but it was “optional” and it was just to make s'mores. Oscar won some cash. Laurence won the Elimination challenge, partially because he made some pork floss at Sherry's suggestion. Sieger put himself in charge of his team's pig, and he did get a little superior about the other team removing the pork loin before it could dry out, but his pork loin was too dry and he was eliminated.(click for more)

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Tuesday, April 14, 2026

Top Chef 4/13/26--"Going Whole Hog" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: everyone had to cook with “random” ingredients because of kids, which wasn't super terrible. Brandon won by basically making a kids' meal. Jennifer sat out again, but didn't go to the doctor this time. After the Elimination challenge, the judges asked if she wanted to stay, and they offered her a guaranteed spot in the future if she wanted to quit. But she didn't, so Jennifer cannot sit out any more challenges or she's out. The Elimination challenge was to highlight dehydrated ingredients. Anthony won, for making a soup that already has dried ingredients in it. Rhoda undercooked her monkfish and was sent home since Jennifer wasn't quitting. (click for more)

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Monday, April 6, 2026

Top Chef 4/6/26--"Cut and Dry" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: Everyone had to do teams of three and do “food flights”, which is where you get three wines and match them up with all the same ingredients? Techniques? Whatever you want, I guess. Justin, Jennifer, and Sieger won that one, with eggs. Then the Elimination challenge asked the contestants to take classic Southern side dishes and make them into main courses. Sieger won by making smothered cabbage with pork belly. Brittany thought the steamer was on, realized it was not on, tried to cook her sausage and re-stuff it into collard greens, but it never happened and she was sent home. (click for more)

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Tuesday, March 31, 2026

Top Chef 3/30/26--"Pick a Side" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: The Quickfire asked the contestants to cook with livermush, which is a local “delicacy”. Anthony managed to keep Laurence from winning more money. Then everyone had to make “colorful” dishes with natural food dyes. Despite not ever saying so, or correcting anyone during the walkthrough, Tom and the rest of the judges decided that what the contestants had been told to do was color every component of their dishes in random unnatural colors. Not enhance whatever colors the food was in nature. So everyone got yelled at for being boring, when they didn't tell them to be weird in the first place. Then Nana got sent home for failing to plate her dish, for the second time out of three Elimination Challenges. Laurence made bao in different colors, so that was “unnatural” enough and he won. (click for more)

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Tuesday, March 24, 2026

Top Chef 3/23/26--"True Colors" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: we had to deal with the stupid gelato sponsor, and talk about regional ingredients or whatever. Just go with it, you would hate it more if the [product placement] was for the Elimination challenge. Laurence won some more money. Then everyone had to make progressive menus, in teams, with hot peppers. Sure. Rhoda made a very spicy short rib dish that everyone loved, and she won again. Jassi doesn't do any spice, but then ended up having to make the spiciest dish, and he couldn't do it. So he was sent home, and now everyone left can go to LCK. (click for more)

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Monday, March 16, 2026

Top Chef 3/16/26--"Puckerbutt" summary

 

Previously on “Top Chef”: we began season 23 with NASCAR and cooking outside in a team Quickfire but only for as long as it took to circle the track 23 times. Just go with it. Jennifer (who is part of the couple), Jonathan (who is one of the identical twins), and Laurence (just here) won the Quickfire and some money. The Elimination challenge was to make something with a variety of sweet potato, but you only have an hour to cook. Rhoda made a street food dish, and the judges enjoyed the meaning and the dish so much she won. Even though Nana had a panic attack that Kristen talked her out of, in the end Tom thought her dish tasted good. Day undercooked both her fish and her sweet potatoes, so she was sent home. Not to Last Chance Kitchen, since she and whoever loses tonight are not eligible. (click for more)

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