I think the show is supposed to be about cooking

OK, I wasn't going to write about "Hell's Kitchen" this season, but then I watched the first episode(s) and it was surprisingly not bad. I mean, doing the first challenge in front of an audience so Ramsey can have people laugh at his jokes, that part was dumb. Dumb, but unsurprising, because it's "Hell's Kitchen". And then the sous chefs come out, and...wait, where's Scott? Where is bad-ass hot chef Scott? He left? What the crap is that!? I mean, Andi's cool and all, but MAN. That is not a good sign right there. (click for more)

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Hell's Kitchen 9/10/12--"Winner Chosen" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Christina and Justin are the final two. They picked out menus and then had that one last competition so they can decide who gets to have first pick of the eliminated contestants for their team. Christina won (in a thrilling tiebreaker, of course). She picked Dana, Patrick, Kimmie, and Robyn. Not sure why she picked Robyn. Justin picked out Barbie, Brian, Royce, and Clemenza, who is kind of annoyed to be last. As they talked about menus, Clemenza was less than thrilled, and when Justin gave him some crap about how Clemenza should want to help Justin to win for Clemenza’s sake, Clemenza bailed.

       

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Hell's Kitchen 9/4/12--"2 Chefs Compete pt. 1" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Dana won the first challenge, which is the “make a dish for cheap that someone would charge outrageous prices for” challenge. It didn’t seem to help her run the fish station though. Christina and Justin were more successful, and Barbie was mostly fine. Then suddenly Ramsey eliminated Barbie, and then we were left with a “To Be Continued” to see which other one goes home.

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Hell's Kitchen 8/27/12--"4 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: everyone was required to teach beauty queens to cook, which mostly went well. Barbie won, somehow, because she’s decided to stop blending into the background and just float by. During dinner service Barbie further distinguished herself by bringing up crappy risotto four times in a row. But everyone is tired of Clemenza’s general suckage so he was sent home, finally.
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Hell's Kitchen 8/20/12--"5 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Clemenza and Dana won the first challenge, which was not very exciting, and then the contestants all worked together in one kitchen for the first time, without any giant hangups. Well, except for Dana on fish, but she just got behind. She also didn’t want Robyn or Clemenza to help her, because they suck. Also they had to compete against a team of runner-ups, although nothing happened with that either. Long story short: Robyn went home.  

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Hell's Kitchen 8/13/12--"6 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: I know it was a while ago, but there was a ton of bickering and Brian was sent home, which was sad. Everyone failed the first challenge but the girls did mostly well in dinner service. Also apparently we have to showcase Ramsey’s new show, so only one episode of Hell’s Kitchen a week until it’s over. On the one hand, I only have to deal with this show once a week. On the other hand, it just drags out this circus forever.

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Hell's Kitchen 7/24/12--"6 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Southern food was featured, and even though Robyn brought up raw chicken more than once, and every single chef was kicked out of the kitchen, Kimmie was sent home. She wasn’t cooking the fish well, and she never stepped up, even though she talked all the time about how she cooked Southern food and that was her wheelhouse.
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Hell's Kitchen 7/23/12--"7 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: dinner service was not that exciting, people were terrible, the usual things. Barbie took forever on prep and then sat back and let everyone fail and was smug about it. Clemenza had trouble keeping track of how many orders of things he needed. The whole men’s team (and Robyn) got kicked out, but Tiffany finally went home. Ramsey was pissed because the teams made their own menus and still couldn’t execute because everyone appears to suck this season. (click for more)
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Hell's Kitchen 7/17/12--"8 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: an eating challenge. For no reason. Then the blind taste test, which everyone always fails. Except Justin, he got all his foods correct. And Kimmie, because she’d rather volunteer to sit out and then bitch about how everyone else sucks. Barbie and Kimmie sort of get into it, but Kimmie is not threatening, unless you’re threatened by crying.  The teams have to come up with menus, and Kimmie is shot down, sort of, and also Robyn. The menus are OK, and mostly pass muster with Ramsey (no thanks to Barbie spending forever cleaning mussels or Clemenza spending forever cleaning his jacket). However, Clemenza has just served quail that hasn’t been boned properly and Ramsey is not happy. (click for more)
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Hell's Kitchen 7/16/12--"9 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: there was another “make a dish out of random ingredients” challenge. The men (and Robyn) won, which was nice to see. Everyone on the women’s team blamed Dana, but then nothing happened with that except Kimmie cried AGAIN and then made a bunch of empty threats about how she was going to kick Dana’s ass. AGAIN.  David Beckham also showed up but nothing came of that because he was super nice about everything. The men fail, the women save them and their tickets, everyone thinks they were fine. It’s like I’m watching the same episode over and over, except this time, no one said anything about Robyn. In fact, she seems to be getting some respect. Royce finally went home, and Clemenza almost did, but I think he’s probably on his last chance. But no more Royce, which is pretty great. (click for more)   
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Hell's Kitchen 7/9/12--"10 Chefs Compete" summary

    Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: nothing happened with Kimmie and her burns, but she went back to the kitchen and made Robyn look stupid as much as possible. I know Robyn isn’t the best chef by any stretch, but Kimmie looked mighty suspicious. Patrick and Royce both failed, and the entire women’s team also got kicked out. Robyn and Kimmie never actually came to blows, and the fight seems to be about how Robyn thought Kimmie, her “friend”, should not call her a bitch. Yeah. Anyway, Patrick was finally sent home, and Robyn was sent to the men’s team, with the promise from Ramsey that if she continues to complain, he’ll know it’s not the women but her. (click for more)
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Hell's Kitchen 7/3/12--"11 Chefs Compete pt. 2" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Kimmie and Robyn fight, and then Tiffany and Barbie fight, and the men win a challenge and then Kimmie burns herself. Also Royce needs to shut up. I think that’s about the gist of it. The DVR description says it all: “Personal dramas distract some contestants.” (click for more)
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Hell's Kitchen 7/2/12--"11 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: the women went to a spa, while the men had to clean the dorms. That’s about how much drama there was with that. The women all still hate each other, but unlike the men, they are able to ignore that to finish dinner service. The men try to get rid of Clemenza and Brian, but Ramsey sees right through all of that nonsense and nominates Roshni for screwing up meat, and Patrick for generally not being a leader. Roshni tries to repeat Clemenza’s passionate defense of himself, which worked for Clemenza but does not work for Roshni, who is sent home. (click for more)
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Hell's Kitchen 6/26/12--"12 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: We finally finished that dinner service with the fashion show, which was not exciting, but since the men are all horndogs this season we had to listen to all of them drool over the models. Whatever. The women did reasonably well, even though Tiffany wasn’t so hot and Robyn ran out of beef. The men had to deal with Clemenza getting slammed on the fish station and the rest of them not really helping. In the end, Clemenza’s passion and ability to stand up for himself saved him from elimination, and Guy went home. (click for more)   
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Hell's Kitchen 6/25/12--"13 Chefs Compete pt. 2" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Poor timing resulted in an entire episode focused on the first challenge, where Robyn didn’t listen and made Kimmie cry (while simultaneously prompting Kimmie to make threats). Also it is “Fashion Night”. Danielle was eliminated early on, but then we didn’t even get any of the dinner service before the episode is over. (click for more) 
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Hell's Kitchen 6/19/12--"13 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Mexican night, the women all hate each other, most people get kicked out of the kitchen, and then for some reason we had to wait until now to see who gets eliminated. Guess we needed those extra few minutes to watch Tiffany get so drunk she mistook Royce for one of her own teammates. (click for more)
   
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Hell's Kitchen 6/18/12--"14 Chefs Compete" summary

    Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Don lost and Roshni switched teams. In other news, how come sometimes the title of the episode is “# Chefs COMPETE” and other times “# Chefs REMAIN”? Also the women seem to all hate each other, while the men are at least pretending to be a team. (click for more)

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Hell's Kitchen 6/12/12--"15 Chefs Remain" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: Barbie made everyone hate her, but for some reason Ramsey likes her. Couldn’t be because everyone else hates her and causes drama. Patrick decided to be the leader of the men’s team, which pissed off the rest of the team. Somehow that helped, though, because the women eventually got kicked out of the kitchen. Briana was sent home for failing to cook cod properly. (click for more)

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Hell's Kitchen 6/11/12--"16 Chefs Compete" summary

Previously on “Hell’s Kitchen”: it was the second episode, so everyone had to wake up super early and humiliate themselves. This time, everyone had to dig through ice and find scallops in the shell. Royce got hit in the face, but it looked like an accident. Contrary to the preview. Then the women cooked scallops properly to win a reward, a skill that lasted…until dinner service. Royce and Guy fight, and Barbie and Tiffany fight, and Barbie and Robyn fight. The women managed to make it to entrees, but Barbie continued to screw up so no entrees ever made it out of the kitchen. Chris couldn’t cook scallops either so both teams got kicked out of the kitchen. Tiffany’s kind of scary when she’s pissed off. The women were so desperate to get rid of Barbie that they put her up against Roshni, who didn’t do anything wrong. The men put up Chris and Royce. Chris ends up being sent home. (click for more)

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Hell's Kitchen 6/5/12--"17 Chefs Compete" summary

I’m not sure why Fox likes to air these episodes over two days. Why not just make two hours of “Hell’s Kitchen” one night and then two hours of “MasterChef” the other night? Anyway, people failed at cooking, cursing was rampant, “customers” were not fed. Tavon was sent home for generally being unhelpful. (click for more) 

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